Today is Memorial Day, which in the United States is a federal holiday. In many ways, it marks a true first day of summer -- pools open, we cook out, and many people even have off from work.
Such is not the case with Nintendo (or myself, it appears), as they're busy launching three titles onto the Virtual Console today: ActRaiser (SNES, 800 points), Kid Chameleon (Genesis, 800 points), and JJ and JEFF (Turbografx-16, 600 points).
I'm going to level with you guys -- I'm tired, a bit hungover, and I'm not really prepared to do much today. But since I like you guys, I've forced myself to spend five minutes with each of these games this morning. And instead of pasting Nintendo's press release after the jump, you'll find impressions that are sure to help you with your buying decisions.
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ActRaiser (SNES, 1 player, 800 Wii Points)
The game starts off with a naked cherub asking me my name; because I'm tired and juvenile, I name myself "BooB." That's funny, so I laugh to myself. The cherub then asks me (as if he can tell I was up all night and dragged myself out of bed to write a post about God damned Virtual Console releases) "Are you awake?" I'm really not, but what's the difference? He tells me I'm going to have to fight some monsters anyway. Well, that's great.
I'm then tossed into a frighteningly detailed menu screen, one that I only vaguely remember from when I received this game as a gift on Christmas day in 1991. I'm old, and it's way to early for this s**t, but I choose "Fight Monsters" because that seems like the thing to do.
The cherub wishes me, Sir BooB, luck and the game then launches into a killer Mode 7 sequence that brings me into the battle. It's at this point that I remember how awesome the game is -- I fight ghoulies, a pissed off ape creature falls out of the sky, and a tree with bad posture spits honey at me. Between this and the game's simulation elements, I'm sold.
Kid Chameleon (Sega Genesis, 1-2 players, 800 Wii Points)
OMG! There's a new arcade in a town ... a virtual reality arcade! Problem is, it seems that the game's boss has escaped and is molesting children (or just defeating them at the game, I can't remember). Apparently, this Genesis classic is the story of someone who was too tough to beat. Someone who, apparently, is so tough that he looks totally bad ass tucking his shirt into his jeans. Someone who is ... Kid Chameleon.
Fine, I'll buy that. Within my first few minutes in the game, I've turned into a knight and a samurai, attacking stumpy dragons and weird stone monsters with tank treads. I think someone was more hungover than I am when they programmed this. The game promises to turn me into midget versions of all sorts of things (hence the "Chameleon" half of the title), including Jason Voorhees and a tank that shoots skulls. That's totally metal.
J.J. & JEFF (TurboGrafx16, 1 player, 600 Wii Points)
From the short amount of time I've spent playing the game this morning, I think I've fully grasped the concept. It appears to be about a gay couple that make dog sounds at one another, instead of talking. They run around the woods kicking the s**t out of each other, fire hydrants, mosquitos, and ugly dogs. There also appear to be poop power-ups ... or poop enemies.
What's the difference? This game rules!
Now, can I go back to sleep?
Contest:
10:58 AM on 05.28.2007
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i fully agree, it was a great mix of game genres..sweet music too
I fucking hate bear traps, BTW.
@dvd - Yeah, bear traps suck nut. As do the guys with the chainsaws. And that idiot girl you have to drag around for the last half of the game. Well, I'd assume it's most of the last half. When I found out it was coming out on the Wii I stopped playing the GC version.
All VC games hold at least one save state. Does that count?
Oof at that bear trap. NOT cool... could you imagine all the poor bf's or ex bf's (myself included) out there falling for the old "let's fuck one last time and forget about you being an asshole so I can get my revenge by sticking your penis full of painful vaginal barbs"?!
Was that a subtle dig there?
I loved that game, and it had such an amazing soundtrack, too.
That sounds convincing =P.
I'll probably buy it eventually (im a sucker for old games) maybe next week if nothing i like comes out, this week it will be ActRaiser and Mystical Ninja (didn't have points when it came out)
There's even more reason to play Pulseman now.
The game doesn't work right on my GP2X, but the translation is ace. Also helps that the voice overs are already english.
And yes, I definitely approve of ActRaiser. Never played much of Kid Chameleon though, but maybe it'd be a good fit on my GP2X as a "play it when there's nothing else", since it's so long, and I have save states (10 per ROM image).
I loved Act Raiser. Played it through bunches of times. I will once again once I get a Wii.
Kid Chameleon was one of the strongest arguments for why the Sega Genesis didn't suck.
I got it and yeah it's crazy hard but still pretty fun.