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Ladies and gentlemen, straight from the Wii School of Cringe-worthy Commercials, we proudly present our latest feature. This is the official trailer for the New Xbox Experience, which truly cements Microsoft's position as "that company desperate as f*ck for a ride on the Casual Gamer Gravy Train."

It's all here -- cynically contemporary music, a bunch of conventionally pretty live-action jerkoffs parading around and showing off how normal they are, and ... Army of Two? Really, Microsoft? 

This trailer is not designed for people like you and me. That said, nor are videos of people taking dumps on each other's chests, and I'll criticize that as well. The only difference here is that the NXE video is slightly less sexy than scat porn.


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52 comments | showing # 51 to 52

Ffordesoon's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/13/2008 10:58
Ffordesoon
I was actually expecting something a lot worse. Like, you know, people jumping around and grinning and shit. Like the Wii commercials.

This just feels incredibly generic and cynical. Sorta like the whole update.

Don't get me wrong, I think the update itself is a smart move; getting the casuals into gaming can only be good. God knows most hardcore gamers aren't demanding completely new experiences. It's like the manga markets in Japan and America; by and large, America gets SF/fantasy/horror manga and the incredibly girly shit. There's very little room for new material in the American manga market, and meanwhile the Japanese have manga about salarymen who play go with their grandmothers. Not that I'd necessarily wanna read that, but the market's there, you know? Choice is always better than no choice.

With more integration of casuals into the market, maybe I won't have to have asinine conversations like this anymore:

"Gah, where's the kill button?"

"It's a puzzle game."

"GAY!"

To paraphrase Shawn Elliott: "When they started showing Sesame Street on TV, did that mean they had to stop showing Hill Street Blues?"
The Amazing Shenazin's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/16/2008 18:53
The Amazing Shenazin
I can literally count the number of teenage girls I've run into on XBL on one hand
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