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These Goat Simulator patch notes are funny

12:45 PM on 06.03.2014 // Jordan Devore
  @DtoidJordan

New map, local splitscreen, and more in patch 1.1

Coffee Stain Studios clearly had fun detailing patch 1.1 for Goat Simulator, which adds four-player local splitscreen, wallrunning, more goats, bike riding, and other stuff at no additional cost to you, valued player. Here's a sample of what's gone into the update:

  • Poured several buckets full of Optimization™ into the game
  • The Humans have learned how to ride Goats
  • This woman made her skin look 20 years younger DOCTORS HATE HER click here
  • Removed Flappy Goat, I hate that fucking game.
  • Got 11 points on Flappy Goat; readded Flappy Goat.
  • Added five new colors, all of which are unseeable by the human eye.
  • We actually bought a stuffed goat head IRL for our office, we have no idea what to do with it.
  • You can now play ragdoll goat hockey!

That last one sounds like good fun. Much of Goat Simulator's charm comes from its spontaneity, so humorous or not, I like that the patch notes aren't overly specific in their descriptions.




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Jordan Devore, Managing Editor
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Jordan is a founding member of Destructoid and poster of seemingly random pictures. They are anything but random. Disclosure: I backed Double Fine Adventure and Awesomenauts: Starstorm on Kickst... more   |   staff directory

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destructoid's previous coverage:
Goat Simulator


  Sep 23

Goat Simulator is selling very well on Android and iOS

Developer calls the mobile version a succeess


  Sep 17

You can now play Goat Simulator on the go

I like the idea of playing it at the DMV


  Aug 13

All the assets in Goat Simulator were actually bought online

Where the giraffes are goats, and the goats are skateboards


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