This morning a Dtoid reader pointed out to us that while resplendent with amazing features, the site was missing an essential display of artistic ability -- the game related limerick. Here was his offering:
I'll tell you the story of shop-owner Nick,
Whose hardware department was very big.
During all penetrations
He called girls his "PlayStations"
Before putting inside them his Memorable Stick.
Well.....I get the gist. After all, the key to a good limerick is that is makes you laugh, right? It seemed to me that while game related limericks were good, it was even more in the spirit of things to involve our staff. Here is my contribution, to get us started:
There once was a boy named Rob
Who seemed to be a bit of a snob.
"Nintendo is gay,"
he often would say
and he caused all the fanboys to sob.
Bring em on, readers.
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Contest:
7:49 PM on 12.23.2006
| 
who had a ...
If Dtoid was Brokeback then Ron would be a beggar
On Ventrilo he'd say sweet nothings to Gregor
"will you make love to me"
"colon parenthesis"
Bend over Joystick, I'll be Heath Ledger
You have no idea.
But you will.
Yes.
You will.
Who bottled his jizz in a jar.
To mod up his new Wii-sel,
He went biodiesel.
Fifteen gallons to power his car.
Catch me if you can.
This crapwich confirms all my fears.
Still, I'll shitcan this Whopper.
To feed my 360 proper.
Sneak King is better than Gears.
Upon this day Jesus was born.
St. Nick left a PSP just this morn.
The games suck, but there's one consolation.
I don't need UMDs for masturbation.
This refurb is loaded with porn!
There once was a web site so cheesy
With a video that made me uneasy:
The guy liked his big screen,
And humped ladders with glee -
So viral the vid made me queasy.
There once was a man from Nintendo
Who crushed bears with his fists and his toes.
Though he'd eat you alive,
He'd rather you survive
And played with his Wii, sans innuendo.
A fanboy once exclaimed from his soapbox,
"OMG the [console name here] 'effin rox!!!1!"
With thoughts incomplete
Toward those who compete,
He'd say, "Oh yeah? Well I'm hung like an Ox."
Yeah, I know they're bad, but hey, they're limericks.
Who was always in vent with Tom Fronz
But when Tom goes to bed
Ishaan's forging ahead
up all night playing Rag in his long johns.
Who built this bitch up from ground zero
Filled his robot with gas
And commenced kicking ass
and has since become everyone's hero
and now that i have ragnarok im putting all them bitches to shame. i fell asleep in my chair at 7am last night ><
The very picture of gamer girl class
We say fuck Florian E.
(Biggest douche there could be)
And kotaku can kiss Dtoid's ass.
I'm not gonna get it, though, cuz I don't want to get divorced.
I'd be on that sucker all day.
You guys ROCK.
he would make all the kids commit larsons
one day he say a wii,he became happy as a bee
But his time's something that must be rationed.
If he played Rag all night
His wife would start fights
And then kill him in stealth ninja fashion.
she found guitar hero quite funny,
then one day she played,
she obsessed right away,
so she's now in my bedroom playing the game.
Which made all the zelda fans blue
The fanboys got pissed
But he's on the friend list
on my wii cuz he's cooler than you.
Who made it onto the video gaming scene
With Princess Lana on her back
Captain N made a play for her crack
Too bad his controller wasn't clean
why haven't you covered/ridiculed it?
this is supposed to be a haiku.
if I lost to this Boss one more time,
So I'm resolved to tear him apart,
and rip out his friggin heart,
so that the next level will be mine
Not that I'm not an ass, but, you know...
Nagiko is totally hot
the boys all hope they've got a shot
to meet in real life
and make her their wife
and each night blow in her game slot
Don't flame me, ladies, she asked for it.
which did follow the word hush
when he takes a dump
lim'ricks fall and jump
right out of his ass called... hush-gush junior?
that's supposed to be a compliment btw, meaning you don't need to think to make a good limerick :P i didn't mean it as in "your limericks suck!"
I got comic art and limericks. I'll be rich in no time.
who was as strong and fast as a puma,
he beats on his wii,
and shouts with such glee,
when he splats the shit out of a goomba