We haven't heard too much about No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle lately, which had me worried that the game wasn't going to make its January 2010 launch date. Seeing the ESRB rating for the game has put those worries to rest. Unless the game's publisher has a sudden change of heart, NMH2 should arrive right on schedule.
That's just the start of the good news. This ESRB rating summary for the game almost seems to be bragging about how awesome No More Heroes 2 will be. Details include talk of enemies pulling their own heads off, players being able to watch portions of Travis Touchdown's favorite anime Bizarre Jelly, and the confirmation of both breast and buttock-jiggle physics. Sorry ladies (and gentlemen), no testicle-jiggle here. Maybe you'll get your chance in No More Heroes 3.
That's not to say that the male genitalia is completely left out of the description. In fact, my favorite part of the posting relates to the entire male crotch. Specifically -- "The battery meter for Travis's sword is always represented by a cartoon-like penis icon in the upper-right corner of the screen: as battery power runs out, the icon starts to shrink—a sad face appears".
Hear that folks? The battery meter for Travis's sword isn't sometimes represented by a cartoon-like penis icon, it's always represented by a cartoon-like penis icon. GOTY 2010 confirmed?
I'm not joking. If No More Heroes 2 turns out to be anything but the most surreal, eye-popping release of 2010, I'm going to be highly disappointed. The ESRB-hype machine has done it again.
Content descriptors: Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Partial Nudity, Sexual Themes, Strong Language
Rating summary:
Players assume the role of Travis, an anime-watching assassin who fights his way through the ranks to become the number-one assassin. Being an assassin means using a retractable katana blade (i.e., a laser sword); it means slicing, chopping, and dismembering human enemies to death in this highly-stylized (somewhat "cartoony"), cell-shaded action game. The depictions of violence in the game are intense, yet somewhat exaggerated: men in black suits are sliced in-half as blood and money flow from their bodies; an assassin with a boombox does not recover after his lower torso has been chopped off—after blood shoots from his empty waist like a geyser; and two women (clad in bikinis) get suspended in mid-air, get caught between the flashing lights, lasers, and frenetic sword swipes of an assassins' duel—the women's heads slide across the floor once the men stop fighting. Cutscenes depict more dismemberment: assassins slicing each other into several pieces in slow-motion, enemies pulling their own heads off, characters displaying trophy-heads on silver platters. These over-the-top depictions of violence account for the Mature rating; they also account for the Intense Violence and Blood and Gore descriptors. The language is strong, too, as characters sometimes use the phrases "f**king a*shole," "f**khead," and "You gotta be sh**tin' me!"
The game contains sexual overtones and partial nudity. Players can watch portions of an anime show called Bizarre Jelly; the opening credits depict a female character whose clothes suddenly disappear, revealing her bare buttocks (one-to-two seconds). Game dialogue contains sexual references, including the phrases "dirty nympho," "the one that's throbbing," and "I feel like that pervy teacher in a porn." Female assassins are depicted in low-cut tops, thongs, short schoolgirl uniforms, and fishnet bondage-style outfits; breasts and buttocks jiggle, and the camera often lingers (there is no equivalent physics applied to male body parts). A couple of cutscenes contain strong sexual innuendo: when characters enter a store, a surprised clerk struggles with his belt buckle and zips up his pants (e.g., "I was just. Uh, doing inventory."); a woman moves a katana blade in front of a man's groin, kneels down, and kisses it (the blade), causing the retractable laser to extend. The battery meter for Travis's sword is always represented by a cartoon-like penis icon in the upper-right corner of the screen: as battery power runs out, the icon starts to shrink—a sad face appears.
AMAZING! I am truly in awe of the good (and disturbed) people at Grasshopper manufacturer, if i could, i would eat their brains to obtain such wealth of an imagination as theirs!
I dunno, I loved the subtleties of NMH, sucks that they are just going for 'HERE'S A COCK YOU GET ERECTED TO POWER UP LOLOLOL' approach... hopefully they don't over do it
@ Bigmoose- NMH 2 has not been announced for the PS3/360 as of yet. It took two years for Marvelous to bring NMH 1 to the PS3/360 (and it doesn't even have a US distributor yet), so I wouldn't hold your breath for the sequel going HD in this console generation.
@ Letters numbers and spaces are ok- That's the thing, unless the game has radically changed since October, the cartoon-like penis icon is pretty subtle.
That's him in the upper left.
I would have never guessed that it was supposed to be a penis, or even penis-like. It's almost as though the ESRB wants NMH 2 to sound more scandalous than it is...
sorry john im really happy for No More Heroes 2 and ima let you finnish, but The Last Guardian will be the most surreal game of all 2010... OF ALL 2010
team ICO always makes the most surreal games, not becuz the throw the most crazy shit into their games, but becuz their games represent a twisted reality with a depth meaning, and afterall, isnt surrealism exactly that?
Good lord those chicks are hot. It's a good thing I don't go to show like that, walking around with a raging hard-on the whole time would be uncomfortable.
@ pl0x kthanxbai - Honestly, I don't think The Last Guardian looks all that surreal. When I think surrealism, I think Dali and Cornell, not so much Di Chirico.
The Last Guardian does look awesome though. If it's somehow better than Ico and SotC, it could easily go on to be the greatest game of all time.
in my opinion ICO games are surreal, becuz despite being somewhat realistic, they feel completely unnatural, this is largely due to the feeling of loneliness those games have
you always feel like theres something wrong, is the kind of loneliness we humans rarely feel, worlds almost completely devoid of both human and animal life, with a dominance of the most absolute silence
not to mention those worlds are completely filled with symbolisms, for example, in SOTC white pigeons appears near mono, 1 for each colossus you killed, this can be interpreted as the fact youve been killing innocent creatures all along, despite your intentions or the fact ICO characters represent purity and innocence, both inherently linked
thats the magic of team ico games, a kind of magic thats felt, rather than blatantly expressed
but well, enough with the artsy fartsy i just wanted an excuse to bring the last guardian up, i havent seen more news about that game in a LOOONG time
@ pl0x- What you're talking about sounds more expressionism, which some would say is more difficult to pull off than surrealism anyway. To me, surrealism is like walking into someone else's bizarre dream, where the rules are constantly shifting all around you. The ICO games are like walking into someone's thoughts while they're meditating, with just a hint of the subconscious leaking into their perception; generally serene and stable, but never totally safe.
Anyway, from what I've seen so far, The Last Guardian actually reminds me more of one of Miyazaki's more subdued movies, like Totoro or something, except more realistic. That's about as awesome as it gets in my book.
So yeah, The Last Guardian could end up being my GOTY 2010 as well. Glad to hear that someone else is excited about it too.
i always tough surrealism relied on relatively familiar forms to express its content while showing completely unnatural scenarios
anyways not all surrealist works has be aligned with the dada movement, some may portrait more familiar scenarios than other, however now that i think about it both ICO and SOTC are more along the lines of expressionism, your right
Two additional thoughts I had. Family Guy was right when they said "America loves hot, white, jailbait ass! Also... These girls are only L4Sex with tanned, ripped abs, body hairless Tidus, Cloud, and other such character cosplayers.
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4:00 AM on 11.29.2009, Jonathan Holmes
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