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The Princess is a cockteasing b*tch: the shirt!

9:57 AM on 12.05.2007, Anthony Burch 46 comments

     Mario

ERER

You read the evidence. You saw the wallpaper.  Now get the shirt.

That's right, ladies and gents (mostly gents, I assume, who aren't Chad Concelmo); you too can now own a piece of Destructoid history with our "The Princess is a Cockteasing B*tch" shirt, made courtesy of SplitReason. Here are the specs:

  • - American Apparel (not made by little Taiwanese kids in sweatshops)
  • - 100% cotton (doesn't feel like cardboard)
  • - 10.2 ounce crewneck T (better than 10.0 ounces)
  • - Double needle cover seamed neck, taped neck and shoulders, double needle sleeve and bottom. (No idea what this means)
  • - Pre-shrunk (Pre-shrunk) 
  • It's time to show your support in the fight against fascist, blonde cockblockery. These swank babies cost only $14.95, and a portion of the proceeds go toward 3rot1cn3rd and myself. So, in other words, buy one or two. Or a dozen. Several dozen.

    If you need to see what they look like on a human (sort of), check out the attached picture, Photoshopped by Mr. Niero himself. Still, though, you shouldn't have to be convinced that this shirt will, in fact, look good on you, and will get you laid.

     


    LAUNCH GALLERY (2 IMAGES)
    Photo Photo
     

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    Barcode's Avatar
    Barcode at 12/05/2007 09:58
    Yeah... it's true.

    Mario busting up bricks with his head just to try to get to her.
    Namelessted's Avatar
    Namelessted at 12/05/2007 10:01
    OH DAMN. that is an awesome fucking shirt.
    Spykron's Avatar
    Spykron at 12/05/2007 10:02
    praise destructoid for showing me the light!
    king3vbo's Avatar
    king3vbo at 12/05/2007 10:06
    HOLY GOOD GOD

    DO WANT!!!
    Riser Glen's Avatar
    Riser Glen at 12/05/2007 10:07
    Need.

    Need now.
    3r0t1c n3rd's Avatar
    3r0t1c n3rd at 12/05/2007 10:08
    BTW, If I ever see someone with this shirt, drinks are on me!
    Gemsi's Avatar
    Gemsi at 12/05/2007 10:08
    Right time you fine meself some more money
    Azereki's Avatar
    Azereki at 12/05/2007 10:14
    Ok, I bought one.
    Guagloves's Avatar
    Guagloves at 12/05/2007 10:18
    Finally the truth is shown to the world.
    kapshhh's Avatar
    kapshhh at 12/05/2007 10:23
    Nice. If only november didn't happen..I'm dry.
    VTSvsAlucard's Avatar
    VTSvsAlucard at 12/05/2007 10:28
    hotness... I love the reaction I get from people who see my wallpaper :P

    Destructoid gains +1 awesome skill.
    Nubc4kes's Avatar
    Nubc4kes at 12/05/2007 10:34
    Oh, man, Chad is going to pissed!
    Milofo's Avatar
    Milofo at 12/05/2007 10:39
    I love how you censor your blog post but openly display the uncensored shirt.
    atheistium's Avatar
    atheistium at 12/05/2007 10:54
    Ordered mine 2 seconds ago :D I can't wait for it to get here!
    Niero's Avatar
    Niero at 12/05/2007 11:04
    I apologize to Chad in advance.
    Jordan Grim Devore's Avatar
    Jordan Grim Devore at 12/05/2007 11:11
    I'm so tempted to get this. Need moar monies first.
    Teta's Avatar
    Teta at 12/05/2007 11:24
    Letīs see the shipping costs to Peru.
    Chad Concelmo's Avatar
    Chad Concelmo at 12/05/2007 11:28
    Even though I vehemently disagree with this atrocity ... I am so getting one ... :)
    Rockvillian's Avatar
    Rockvillian at 12/05/2007 11:34
    OOOO. I hope my lady gets me this for Christmas, even if Peach is her main in Melee.
    Shin Oni's Avatar
    Shin Oni at 12/05/2007 11:37
    why does that Mario face oh so remind me of Bluto from Popeye?

    I gonna get.
    The-Excel's Avatar
    The-Excel at 12/05/2007 12:02
    I can't see this shirt succeeding unless you ship at least 500 copies of the supporting article in pamphlet form with each shirt.
    sleepingagain's Avatar
    sleepingagain at 12/05/2007 12:03
    lol, im going to order one of these this week
    potter's Avatar
    potter at 12/05/2007 12:11
    I might just have to...
    Quazy v2's Avatar
    Quazy v2 at 12/05/2007 12:23
    That shirt just reminds me about how often you had to go save her which then reminded me of this comic.

    http://www.fanboys-online.com/index.php?cid=7

    She needs to first learn how to not be kidnapped and then learn to show Mario some appreciation.
    brad drac's Avatar
    brad drac at 12/05/2007 14:40
    Fucking love it. I'm strongly considering a purchase.
    Necros's Avatar
    Necros at 12/05/2007 15:13
    I'd tap that. If I had the money, that is.
    carrierj1's Avatar
    carrierj1 at 12/05/2007 17:11
    Oh yeh, real cool. This looks like something an emo kid would wear. Anyway, Mario has already f*cked the Princess. They just don't show anything on camera.
    BFeld13's Avatar
    BFeld13 at 12/05/2007 17:25
    So awesome. Too bad I wouldn't wear it outside the house.
    drkdmnluck's Avatar
    drkdmnluck at 12/05/2007 20:39
    Double-needle construction is more durable than single-needle construction. it uses teo needles threaded with two threads that go through each other and make the seams. Single-needle construction uses one piece of thread and can cause puckering at the seam, and is more shoddy.

    However, if you intend to sell a t-shirt in the US, or a dress shirt, it had better be double-needle. Though you can get ripped off with single-needle dress shirts.

    ... Are you still awake?

    Cover-seam neck means the seam there is not exposed; the threads will not irritate your neck, because they are rolled inside the cloth they join. Also a given.
    Paddylicious's Avatar
    Paddylicious at 12/06/2007 00:21
    yes! bought it, even though nobody (except maybe one person i know) will get what it means.
    Scape's Avatar
    Scape at 12/06/2007 16:50
    This was linked on collegehumor.com...nice.
    Fading Star's Avatar
    Fading Star at 12/06/2007 16:58
    I might buy this t-shirt.
    Mushman's Avatar
    Mushman at 12/06/2007 16:59
    woah, Dtoid speaks the truth like no other, now i need to find shipping costs to the uk,DAMN!!
    Husky Hog's Avatar
    Husky Hog at 12/06/2007 19:00
    holy shit!

    If only there was one for Daisy
    vexed alex's Avatar
    vexed alex at 12/06/2007 21:46
    I'll be buying this tomorrow. Checks come Fridays!
    SourGr8pes's Avatar
    SourGr8pes at 12/06/2007 22:17
    I'M IN!

    Although I find Rosalina to be more of a cocktease than Peach. Peach has got some massive PMS, as evidenced by that game on the DS she was in.
    3r0t1c n3rd's Avatar
    3r0t1c n3rd at 12/07/2007 11:24
    God, you give a mouse a cookie....
    J03yyz's Avatar
    J03yyz at 12/07/2007 14:21
    layme
    Ichigo Style's Avatar
    Ichigo Style at 12/07/2007 22:29
    "The Princess" Fail.
    I was definitely going to buy it until I saw it didn't read "Princess Peach", now I'll think about it.
    Anthony Burch's Avatar
    Anthony Burch at 12/08/2007 21:27
    Well, it's that or we get sued and the shirt gets taken down altogether. People will still know which princess you're talking about, trust me.
    joepaniic's Avatar
    joepaniic at 12/21/2007 09:19
    anyone notice this made it to collegehumor.com ?
    prev next

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