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The day the Zunes stood still: Every 30GB Zune in the world has died!? photo

This is not strictly videogame-related, but it's such an incredibly freaky story that I'm sure you'll all forgive a rather tenuous link. Unbelievable reports have come in claiming that every single 30GB Zune in the world spontaneously died at 2AM this morning and now refuses to work.

According to the reports, the Zunes reset, powered back up and proceeded to freeze on the loading bar screen at roughly the same time. At the moment, no conventional means of resetting has worked. Due to the bizarre simultaneous nature of the crash, a number of people are now referring to the event as Y2K9. 

This is incredible, and can't be good for a company that brought us the infamous red ring of death. Quite how Microsoft is going to live this one down after producing a terminally ill videogame console is beyond me. Just to test this problem, our very own Brad Nicholson called his girlfriend, who owns a Zune. Sure enough, it's broken. 

Rest assured, I'm laughing my arse off as I type this. It's probably the craziest story we've had in 2008, and right on the last day of the year, too. Thank you, Microsoft: your commitment to quality hardware never ceases to produce pure gold.

[Update: According to Major Nelson, they fixed the issue a very short moment ago. His Zune wasn't working, either, but magically fixed itself. Tech support had no clue of a fix when we asked them about it, though. Whatever happened might have happened of its own ghostly accord. Weird, weird stuff.]

[Update Update: Okay, now we're hearing it's NOT fixed. HAHA! This is the gift that keeps on giving. Apparently, the issue has something to do with the new firmware being unable to handle today's "leap second," where one extra second is added onto the day. Or something.]


Continue: More Zune stories





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next 50 comments

156 comments | showing # 1 to 50

Diomeneus's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:01
Diomeneus
just... wow
eternalplayer2345's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:02
eternalplayer2345
I laughed so hard, but seriously this is the most impressive tech failure I've ever seen.
Dan Luigi Mario's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:04
Dan Luigi Mario
i lol'd




a lot.
n0brein's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:04
n0brein
oh my godz the world is going to end, we're all gonna die
RUUUUUNN!!
masterninja's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:05
masterninja
Wow...I'm so glad I stuck to my PSP for my multimedia needs right about now...
Tha Meat's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:06
Tha Meat
They'll just extend the warranty and blind everyone by buying another exclusive, end of story.
Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:06
Justice
Incredible, what a way to end the year.
Vitamin Awesome's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:07
Vitamin Awesome
I just reached into my jacket pocket to look at mine...

Holy Fuck.
Rhyno's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:08
Rhyno
Are they just trying to create the biggest hardware failure ever? It seems like they just don't want "reliable" associated with them at all.
Oh well, glad I have on iTouch and not a Zune.
Rygiz's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:08
Rygiz
DAMN YOU KEANU!!!!
Brad Nicholson's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:11
Brad Nicholson
I've been on hold with tech support for over 56 minutes now, by the way. Awesome.
Cataract's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:11
Cataract
Mines still working. What "report" said this?
Looptron's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:11
Looptron
Yup. Both mine and my mother's are like that too. Noticed it last night and just thought oh well, when the battery dies it'll reset. Guess not :-(
mistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:12
mistic
lol this is just too fucking awesome!

too bad for the people stupid enough to get one of those pieces of crap though :p

jsut hope something like this won't happen to the 360's tonight :p guess a lot of devs at M$ will be spending their new years eve at work :-)
SephirothX's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:13
SephirothX
Wow. Just wow.
Mabui's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:14
Mabui
That is wow - someone didn't pay the programmers.
Shirley Temple's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:15
Shirley Temple
Just checked mine. ...wtf.

@cataract

Do you have the 30GB model?
kwaselow's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:15
kwaselow
If Microsoft makes a Zune announcement in the forest, and nobody's around to hear it, does anybody care?
El-Sveppi's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:15
El-Sveppi
Impressive.....most impressive
BattyAdroit's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:18
BattyAdroit
The Day the Zune Stood Still
Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:19
Justice
@Cataract
Apparently it's only the first set of 30GB Zunes.
Kathos's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:20
Kathos
I have an 80GB, guess we're ok huh?
Drach's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:20
Drach
Wow, Jim.. what a coincidence.. I just bought a used iTouch from a friend for $100 last night.. That's just messed up how I get a portable music player made by apple, and the same night Microsoft's Zune goes ape shit. Fucking weird! Sounds like they were rigged to go. That and hilarious pic, Jim.. made me laugh.
Sam Spectre's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:21
Sam Spectre
LMAO

Way to go Microsoft. Great way to end the year.
Sukes's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:22
Sukes
I'm sorry but Bill deserves a High-Five on this one.
ZServ's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:25
ZServ
<_<.. this sucks.
madmatt's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:27
madmatt
When I chose the 80gb they laughed at me. WHO IS LAUGHING NOW HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
youstolemykill's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:27
youstolemykill
Got to love M$Soft. Good thing I don`t have a Zune.
Drach's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:27
Drach
On a lighter note: How the HELL does that company stay in business?! Evey piece of hardware that says "Microsoft" on it seems to fail, whether it be a RROD or the Zunes all deciding to not work at the same time... STOP BUYING MICROSOFT CRAP PEOPLE. Obviously they can't make hardware, and their software seems to be equally as bad.
I guess this just shows my age.. When I was young, companies that sold shitty hardware didn't stay in business long... I'm baffled at how they keep selling things to people after all this..

(tries to hide his Xbox360 arcade)
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:27
Sharpless
Y2K 2: The Reckoning. This is hilarious.
Zombutler's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:28
Zombutler
My 80G Zune which I wuv very much is fine.
Also, major nelson just twittered "If you have a Zune 30 that was not working, I just found out that issue was resolved. You should be good to go." So.....
Detry's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:28
Detry
I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know that you're afraid... you're afraid of us. You're afraid of change. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it's going to begin. I'm going to hang up this phone, and then I'm going to show these people what you don't want them to see. I'm going to show them a world without you. A world without rules and controls, without borders or boundaries. A world where anything is possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.
Zombutler's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:30
Zombutler
Also to build upon what major said over at HardOCP.com they seem to have concluded that it's the latest Firmware for the Zune 30GB, it's having issues with the fact that 2008 is a leap year and this is the 366th day of the year.
Zune's that haven't been updated with more recent Firmware are functioning just fine, so are the larger capacity models.
FatherChesz's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:31
FatherChesz
So basically everyone that raced out to Toys R Us on Black Friday last year to snag the brown ones for like 50 bucks has got to be pretty pissed. That's hilarious to me, probably because I don't have one.
Holyetheline's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:31
Holyetheline
This kind of thing would never happen with an Ipod.
Cataract's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:32
Cataract
Wait, scratch that. Now mines locked up. Godfucking damnit.
whormongr's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:32
whormongr
I use an archos and a no name sylvania- and my wife is using my old creative zen, makes me glad
Azzurus's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:34
Azzurus
I was wondering why mine wasn't working. Now I'm laughing uncontrollably. Massive entire world Xbox 360 fail in 3..2..1..
Tehmtnlion's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:35
Tehmtnlion
So are they rigged to blow now? I'd suggest getting several dozen meters away from any 30gb Zune as of right now.
John B's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:37
John B
Major Nelson says that it's fixed? Exactly HOW? And how will every Zune know about this fix? What .. Microsoft throws a switch and they all start working again? "Big Brother", anyone?
Zombutler's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:38
Zombutler
OK major nelson just twittered that he was wrong and it's not fixed yet
Zenki's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:38
Zenki
Major Nelson just updated his Twitter there is NO FIX at this time. As a Zune 30GB owner I am ready to throw this brick at someone from Microsoft.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:40
Jim Sterling
This is the greatest slow news day ever.
Genki-JAM's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:40
Genki-JAM
.....
Fuck.

Well, maybe mine isn't affected by it yet since the battery's dead..? I hope I hope I hope I hope! Nonetheless, I'm looking for a new MP3 player right now, because even if they DO fix this, I'm done with it anyway.
grassr00ts's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:42
grassr00ts
@tehmtnlion

LMFAO
Pangloss's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:46
Pangloss
Oh hell yes this is hilarious. Y2K was a gigantic let-down (I was halfway hoping we'd all get our Road Warrior on), but it looks like the shit we were worried about was actually more or less real.

And for everyone that's screaming about Microsoft and hardware problems, this is pretty obviously a software issue.
Sam Spectre's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:46
Sam Spectre
I'm just waiting for my 360 to explode.
Zombutler's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:48
Zombutler
looks like it was survival of the fittest in Zuneland...80gb and 120gb zunes rule the land
NihonTiger90's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:48
NihonTiger90
I smell a lawsuit.

Also, the Xbox 360 ad on the side of this article is rather ironic.
Slique's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/31/2008 10:52
Slique
Microsoft: the company that just keeps on giving.
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