[Teenage Pokemon is a cartoon show about Pokemon in their middle stage of evolution -- they take your weak resistance and throw it in your face. New episodes every week.]
While last week's Teenage Pokemon was a cautionary tale about high speed internet connections and fully firing amygdalas, this week's "Too Hot for Machinima" episode takes a different look at how mixing humanity's most powerful tools with its underlying primitive instincts can lead to some massive problems.
We live in a world today where videogame-style power-ups are a reality. Having trouble concentrating on a test? Get your doctor to prescribe some ADHD meds. Want to be the very best at sport? Buy some hormones and/or red blood cell invigorating stimulants (but just don't win too often, lest you get investigated later). Don't like the shape of your butt, face, or buttface? Get them powered-up with a spread-shot of collagen or blast of laser surgery. Need to increase your damage output and hit points in order to conquer the last boss of the dungeon? Just take one of these, and call a doctor if erection last for more than 3 hours. It's gotten to the point where it's hard to tell which people are made from their original code and which are mostly Game Genies and ROM hacks. Where will this pursuit of perfection through physiological cheat codes lead us?
It was questions like these, as well as the arbitrary standards of Pokemon racism and homophobia, the moral implications of Ditto's life as a Day Care bound prostitute, and the wonder of poly-sexual purple putty people in general that inspired this week's episode of Teenage Pokemon.
Thanks again to our own Jim Sterling for voicing Ditto. You were perfect.
Nekrosys Hell yes. Nekro just pulled this from a Pokemon card booster pack. Don't judge me, I find the game to be fun, even if my deck is terrible.KnickKnackMyWack So I decided to tinker around with some assets in Source Filmmaker and make a still image. Kind of a Jurassic Park-inspired thing with dino assets from that Ark game. Care to offer some comments, critique, etc.?LaTerry I think I broke it...Torchman I have joined the discord group! Now I can call your waifu shit in more than one place!TheBlondeBass Everyone's posting about waifus and I'm just here posting a blog about why I enjoy a recent game instead. This is why I'll never be promoted.Gundy There is a Spelunker themed dungeon in Megadimension Neptunia called Neplunker. It even comes complete with Spelunker music and dying from falling off waist high ledges! 10/10 would game over again.RadicalYoseph Reminder: We have an unofficial chat page on Discord! It's fast and easy to sign up and join, too! Just create an account and click this link to join: https://discord.gg/0koh7AdmqhhpYQe4
(Expires after 24 hours)The Dyslexic Laywer You know among all the bosses I've fought I didn't expect Vagina Tooth Dragon to go down like a bitch.TheKodu News Tip off for anyone who wants it. Seems Binding of Issac has been banned from the Apple IOS app store.
Nathan D Waifu Wars piece is up. But also, I got the Trails of Cold Steel limited edition in the mail the other day and just now looked at the pin you get with it. Wow, that horse is one smug looking son of a bitch. Kind of makes me want to punch him...
ScionVyse You can now buy Naruto movies on Steam. At least sell some good movies if you're going to get into anime Steam.Niwannabe All right, you guys, time for the important questions. Fuck, Marry, Kill: Tharja, Sully and Sumia?Fuzunga The time has come for me to play Earthbound.Pixie The Fairy As the Ultimate Waifu gazed down upon the Earth from her Celestial Throne, she sighed, for mainly shit-tier waifus were being chosen. But one fairy gazed into the stars, declaring her love, sacrificing dreams and spiders on an alter of glitter for her.ikiryou When a new Destiny article comes outAlphadeus Thanks to my girlfriend, we own a PS4 now. ID is Ikaruszino. I don't own any multiplayer games (yet) or have PS Plus (yet :p), but feel free to add me so in the future maybe we can play something.Bardley My absolute finest moment in all of Metal Gear. Also, the first time I had driven a truck.JohnSmith123 Ok.
That EDF 4.1 game is really really good. You can even sing and shout "EDF!" with your soldiers! Holy crackers.StriderHoang I want to goad my wife into playing RE Revelations 2 with me but I don't know if she can deal with the whole 3D spatial movement thing, even if she plays the supporting character.Lawman Heads-up: Mega Man soundtracks are free right now at the Capcom Store. Guessing it's a glitch. All of them are digital downloads, except for Mega Man 9, which is a physical CD that requires money for shipping. Link in comments.