[Teenage Pokemon is a cartoon show about Pokemon in their middle stage of evolution -- they take your weak resistance and throw it in your face. New episodes every week.]
While last week's Teenage Pokemon was a cautionary tale about high speed internet connections and fully firing amygdalas, this week's "Too Hot for Machinima" episode takes a different look at how mixing humanity's most powerful tools with its underlying primitive instincts can lead to some massive problems.
We live in a world today where videogame-style power-ups are a reality. Having trouble concentrating on a test? Get your doctor to prescribe some ADHD meds. Want to be the very best at sport? Buy some hormones and/or red blood cell invigorating stimulants (but just don't win too often, lest you get investigated later). Don't like the shape of your butt, face, or buttface? Get them powered-up with a spread-shot of collagen or blast of laser surgery. Need to increase your damage output and hit points in order to conquer the last boss of the dungeon? Just take one of these, and call a doctor if erection last for more than 3 hours. It's gotten to the point where it's hard to tell which people are made from their original code and which are mostly Game Genies and ROM hacks. Where will this pursuit of perfection through physiological cheat codes lead us?
It was questions like these, as well as the arbitrary standards of Pokemon racism and homophobia, the moral implications of Ditto's life as a Day Care bound prostitute, and the wonder of poly-sexual purple putty people in general that inspired this week's episode of Teenage Pokemon.
Thanks again to our own Jim Sterling for voicing Ditto. You were perfect.
Unsavory comments? Please report harassment, spam, and hate speech to our moderators, and flag the user (we will ban users dishing bad karma). Can't see comments? Apps like Avast or browser extensions can cause it. You can fix it by adding *.disqus.com to your whitelists.
Mike Martin Older. Grayer. Wiser. Dick still works. #BallinFlanxLycanth Wow I just want a mic for the PS4...why are they so expensive ;_;ikiryou Went to play MGSV, got prompted to download the MGO data; it's not on the PS Store yet. Or maybe it's Kojima-san's way of telling me it's not the real MGO data, but is instead a janitor who once protected me from a puddle of pee and now wears my face.CJ Andriessen Going grey >>>>>>>>>>> Going baldRudorlf Recently watched the Cannon Films documentary, by the director of Not Quite Hollywood. Super entertaining, hilarious, and it almost made me want to watch some of the Cannon films. Almost.CaimDark Reloaded PEOPLE! PEOPLE! PEOPLE!
Tomorrow I'm meeting Shade of Light in RL!able to think Tip for those who have plasma TVs and are playing MGSV; go into settings and make the weapon icon only appears when you're aiming. I had to buy a new TV because the weapon icon got permanently burned into my plasma.FlanxLycanth Any of you cute little butts gonna be at London Comic Con?Jiraya You felt your sins crawling on your back...
[youtube]https://youtu.be/B2jVbSI9H4o[/youtube]Halflocke what was the first game that used crowd motivated you to contribute ?Mike Martin Mad Max, Critters and some The life and times of Tim to finish the night. T'was a good day. techsupport I was excited to learn one of my favorite Philip K. Dick novels, The Man in the High Castle, would be receiving its own TV show. After watching the pilot, I'm cautiously optimistic. Looking forward to the rest in November.Nekrosys I'm going to be honest; this is my new favourite line in anything ever. GOTY 2015 and all that. Also cocks: [img]http://i.imgur.com/jAJl3gf.jpg[/img]VIRGO I thought Laura Kate's Destiny piece for Polygon was pretty neat.Barry Kelly Bungie have decided Kojima isn't the only one who can do 4th wall breaking shenanigans. Congratulations Destiny players, you're all now The Taken King.VIRGO I have (jokingly) wanted a remake/sequel to Geist. And then I went to YouTube to watch a longplay to see it in action again and thought, "nevermind!" The humblest person I know I'd been worried that Jim had been losing his sanity with all the Steam sludge he's always attacking. If you've been feeling the same way, good news. His new vid warmed that void and reminded me that I follow him because he had no sanity to start with. ;)CoilWhine Reading the Star Citizen expose reminded me of the whole Firefall mess last year. [url="http://www.gamefront.com/no-win-situation-the-troubled-history-of-firefall-and-red-5-studios-part-1/"]Found the gamefront article [/url]
GoofierBrute I went from listening to the soundtrack of SMT IV, to the soundtrack to Mario Kart 8, Smash 4, Fire Emblem, and now chilling with some Mother 3. All of it was pretty awesome by the way.Pixie The Fairy After the 11th, I'm going into cryosleep until SMT IV Final is out. I'm sure Mike, Occams and Strider can manage without me. [img]http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/avp/images/a/a7/Ripley_in_hypersleep.PNG[/img]