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Mario's li'l dick photo
Mario's li'l dick

Mario's silhouette shows off his li'l dick

Also he shares animations with Kid Kool
Aug 04
// Darren Nakamura
Mario has been with us for a long time. He's an icon. He has been scrutinized, discussed, and deified among gamers. That doesn't matter at all right now. What matters right now is Mario's silhouette looks like it has a li'l d...
Game changer photo
Game changer

Upcoming PhysX update introduces state of the art dick physics (Fauxclusive)

Schlong live the new era of gaming
Jul 18
// CJ Andriessen
Game developers around the world will soon be able to create the most naturalistic penises ever when NVIDIA releases the next update for its popular PhysX SDK. Codenamed “Woody Womb Pecker,” the update is being ...
Rustic photo

Rustic: Rust generates avatar cock size by Steam ID

Jun 23
// Steven Hansen
Haha, rustic. I think it's time for Jordan to take another Rust adventure. The open world survival sim is fascinating. It recently made headlines when players flipped out after it randomly assigned face and skin tone to users...
Cage'd photo

The most unrealistic thing that has ever happened in a video game

Jun 22
// Steven Hansen
"I liked Indigo Prophecy, but Heavy Rain and Beyond sucked." Oh, is that right? Heavy Rain is a little bit bad, and I haven't played Beyond, but let's never get rose-tinted when talking about Fahrenheit/Indigo Prophecy. Beca...

Jiggly photo

Jigglypuff punching Mario straight in the dick

Highbrow stuff
Jun 04
// Brett Makedonski
The Destructoid staff workshopped this headline together, as we usually do. We decided that it was straight to the point, kind of the way that Jigglypuff's arm-paddle thing is straight to the point ("the point" is Mario's dic...
Don't get cocky photo
Don't get cocky

Expensive dick moderation helped kill the last LEGO MMO

Minecraft competitor? Don't get cocky
Jun 03
// Steven Hansen
Someone think about the children! Like my own personal brand, LEGO is a family-friendly, name-stealing company. And so the open-ended, Minecraft-like builder LEGO Worlds has some problem what with immature idiots' propensity ...
Nuts, baby! photo
Nuts, baby!

Oh hell yeah! Ashen Rift has dog testicle (balls!) physics

Havok? More like have-dick (and balls!)
Dec 03
// Steven Hansen
Ashen Rift is a nice-looking, post apocalypse shooter, etc. There was a Kickstarter, now there is a new one. It'll come to PC and PSN eventually. Now that the housekeeping is out of the way... DOG BALLS PHYSICS!!! My en...
Penis photo
Also, cocks
Far Cry's new thing seems to be free flowing painted/tribal tits, nipple slips be damned, and those feature prominently in this video. But if you stick around, you'll see that there is also a little, flaccid penis! I never l...

Lil dick pt 2 photo
Lil dick pt 2

That expensive, gold Monster Hunter statue? Doesn't have a lil dick!

Schrödingers' cat's dick no longer incumclusive
Sep 05
// Steven Hansen
Last month, we brought you an investigative, penetrative look at this $29,000 gold Monster Hunter statue. Particularly, "does it...does it have a lil dick?" we asked. It wasn't immediately clear. All the photos prov...
Schrödingers' cat's dick photo
Schrödingers' cat's dick

Does this $29,000 gold Monster Hunter statue have a lil dick?

Schrödingers' cat's dick
Aug 03
// Steven Hansen
Capcom is selling a $29,000, solid gold Otomo Airou statue to commemorate the 10th anniversary of Monster Hunter.  Does it have a dick, though? We at the Destructoid virtual office thought it might. "does it...does ...
Tokyo Jungle photo
Tokyo Jungle

America wasn't as into Tokyo Jungle as Europe

But, but, it has Poms!
May 02
// Jordan Devore
Asked how Tokyo Jungle fared outside of Japan, director Yohei Kataoka gave Siliconera a rather discouraging response for us fans in the United States. "Europe loved it, and we got a lot of great feedback from that audience, b...
Far Cry: Blood Dragon photo
Far Cry: Blood Dragon

Is Blood Dragon III: Vietnam War 2 just an April Fools' Day joke?

I sure hope not
Apr 01
// Alasdair Duncan
Look, my attitude to April Fools' Day is that if it looks like bollocks and it sounds like bollocks, then it probably is bollocks. However, after last year's reveal of the amazing Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon on April Fools' Day, ...
Frog Fractions 2 photo
Frog Fractions 2

Is there a Frog Fractions 2 ARG already underway?

My head is spinning already and it has nothing to with actual fractions
Mar 17
// Alasdair Duncan
The original Frog Fractions was one of the most bizarre things you could play in in a web browser, so it wasn't a surprise to see a potential sequel arrive on Kickstarter last week. What is odd is that, if the Kickstarter is ...
Dtoid TV photo
Dtoid TV

Live show: Soldier of Fortune: Payback

The return of WTF Wednesday
Nov 06
// Rick KingFoom Olson
[Mash Tactics airs Monday through Friday at 4p.m. Pacific on Dtoid.TV. Watch Rick 'King Foom' Olson play a variety of games, each day with its own theme. With a heavy focus on community and viewer interaction, you c...

Browse Destructoid with your arrow keys like a boss

Test drive this curious contraption
May 04
// Niero Desu
Would you like to browse Destructoid posts by just using your arrow keys? Here you go. The tool was created by the folks at Nextly, a cool browser app that lets you skip from one post to another at the click of a key, and also lets you import your social feeds (or explore other favorite feeds, like Reddit). They're currently in beta and are curious to know what you think. Do want?
Curiosity photo

Curiosity goes a bit mad with new in-app purchases

A 'war of attrition' will ensue, hopes Molyneux
Apr 19
// Jordan Devore
I had long since deleted Curiosity from my iPhone after spending admittedly far too much time (see: more than five minutes) tinkering with the cooperative game about chipping away layers of a massive cube. But now, here I am,...

New Dtoid site feature violates Trademark! Help!

Feb 12
// Niero Desu
Last week Destructoid rolled out a new feature, as requested on our Uservoice forum, that allowed our editors to group clusters of stories together around a specific product (instead of using related tags or creating a t...
Ni no Kuni pee-pee photo
Ni no Kuni pee-pee

I helped a girl take a piss in Ni No Kuni

Sympathy for the NPC
Jan 23
// Niero Desu
It wouldn't be fair to say that Ni No Kuni has a specific urination quest. It's more of a side story or side effect of a larger task, if you will.  Nevertheless, when I came upon this girl who needed to whiz, I immediate...
2 Legit 2 Quit photo
2 Legit 2 Quit

The Mario Brothers expand their plumbing business in SF

Half-price plumbers hire half-ethical graphic designers
Jan 14
// Niero Desu
This is completely legit.

EVE Online update overhauls bounty hunting

In a game this crazy, the patch notes are just insane!
Dec 05
// Sterling Aiayla Lyons
EVE Online is one tough cookie to crack. Sure, it's a massively multiplayer online game. It's also one part space-faring strategy game, business simulator, and space-pirate dream fantasy as well. Much of the game is filled wi...

Peter Molyneux and the curious case of the £50,000 DLC

Jun 07
// Fraser Brown
Peter Molyneux can't simply make a game; it has to be an experiment. With Fable, it appears that he wanted to see how interaction would work when you were restricted to farting or doing a chicken dance. Maybe there was more t...

Paradox Interactive Con 2012: We're in a castle, b**ch!

Jan 19
// Niero Desu
Welcome to another installment of Destructoid On Assignment: the extravagant lives of videogame blogging where you, our supportive readers, wish to swiftly murder us for doing cool things nobody should be gainfully employed t...

Get high scores with your urine!

Nov 26
// Fraser Brown
When I'm doing mundane day to day rubbish I frequently wish I was playing videogames. Especially right now, with so many impressive games that have been screaming to be played. However, the few seconds it takes me to empty my...

Dtoid Comments overhaul cometh! Please update your email

Nov 02
// Niero Desu
Yep, we're overhauling our comments system at last.  We've tried building our own but the spammers always win, so we're bringing in the big guns.  I'm happy to announce that Dtoid will be powered by Disqus shortly. ...

PlayStation 3 kiosks freezing up ... on purpose!

Dec 26
// Nick Chester
Have you ever spent any time in a Best Buy, EB Games, or GameStop playing their PlayStation 3 demo unit and have it freeze up on you? No, you haven't... or so I was told by a Sony rep a few days back. Just before the launch o...

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