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#what sort of tomdickery?

THIS ISN'T A JOKE ON-LINE photo
THIS ISN'T A JOKE ON-LINE

BREAKING: Stanley Parable dev promises new 'MMO with poetry mechanics'

Responding to recent reports of Titanfall 2's promises for a single-player component that is "science meets magic," co-creator of The Stanley Parable and director of Dr. Langeskov, The Tiger, and the Terribly Cursed Emerald: A Whirlwind Hei...

 
WHAT!? photo
WHAT!?

GameStop is publishing a game AND 'not trying to be a publisher'

Hahaha. The new hotness from Insomniac (aside from the Ratchet and Clank tie-in) is Song of the Deep, a 2D, underwater metroidvania. It's $15 for PC, PS4, Xbox One. And GameStop, the retailer, is publishing it. But don't call GameStop a pub...

 
GOTY 2015 photo
GOTY 2015

Mike Martin's picks for games that he picked in 2015

Hello everybody! Your (not so) favorite, foul-mouthed, perverted, shit-posting Community Manager here. 2015 was a helluva year for games. All bullshit aside, we are starting to see some truly amazing games come out. When I was a babby, play...

 
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8===D

Friday Night Fights - It is here!

It is almost Christmas and there is a new Star Wars movie out. *drops mic*

 
Mario's li'l dick photo
Mario's li'l dick

Mario's silhouette shows off his li'l dick

Mario has been with us for a long time. He's an icon. He has been scrutinized, discussed, and deified among gamers. That doesn't matter at all right now. What matters right now is Mario's silhouette looks like it has a li'l dick. Originally...

 
Game changer photo
Game changer

Upcoming PhysX update introduces state of the art dick physics (Fauxclusive)

Game developers around the world will soon be able to create the most naturalistic penises ever when NVIDIA releases the next update for its popular PhysX SDK. Codenamed “Woody Womb Pecker,” the update is being called a game-c...

 
Rustic photo
Rustic

Rustic: Rust generates avatar cock size by Steam ID

Haha, rustic. I think it's time for Jordan to take another Rust adventure. The open world survival sim is fascinating. It recently made headlines when players flipped out after it randomly assigned face and skin tone to users' Steam IDs. An...

 
Cage'd photo
Cage'd

The most unrealistic thing that has ever happened in a video game

"I liked Indigo Prophecy, but Heavy Rain and Beyond sucked." Oh, is that right? Heavy Rain is a little bit bad, and I haven't played Beyond, but let's never get rose-tinted when talking about Fahrenheit/Indigo Prophecy. Because for its exc...

 
Jiggly photo
Jiggly

Jigglypuff punching Mario straight in the dick

The Destructoid staff workshopped this headline together, as we usually do. We decided that it was straight to the point, kind of the way that Jigglypuff's arm-paddle thing is straight to the point ("the point" is Mario's dick). All this di...

 
Don't get cocky photo
Don't get cocky

Expensive dick moderation helped kill the last LEGO MMO

Someone think about the children! Like my own personal brand, LEGO is a family-friendly, name-stealing company. And so the open-ended, Minecraft-like builder LEGO Worlds has some problem what with immature idiots' propensity to build cock. ...

 
Nuts, baby! photo
Nuts, baby!

Oh hell yeah! Ashen Rift has dog testicle (balls!) physics

Ashen Rift is a nice-looking, post apocalypse shooter, etc. There was a Kickstarter, now there is a new one. It'll come to PC and PSN eventually. Now that the housekeeping is out of the way... DOG BALLS PHYSICS!!! My enthusiasm was sl...

 
Penis
Far Cry's new thing seems to be free flowing painted/tribal tits, nipple slips be damned, and those feature prominently in this video. But if you stick around, you'll see that there is also a little, flaccid penis! I never l...   read

Lil dick pt 2 photo
Lil dick pt 2

That expensive, gold Monster Hunter statue? Doesn't have a lil dick!

Last month, we brought you an investigative, penetrative look at this $29,000 gold Monster Hunter statue. Particularly, "does it...does it have a lil dick?" we asked. It wasn't immediately clear. All the photos provided by Capcom ...

 
Schrdingers' cat's dick photo
Schrdingers' cat's dick

Does this $29,000 gold Monster Hunter statue have a lil dick?

Capcom is selling a $29,000, solid gold Otomo Airou statue to commemorate the 10th anniversary of Monster Hunter.  Does it have a dick, though? We at the Destructoid virtual office thought it might. "does it...does it have a lil d...

 
Tokyo Jungle photo
Tokyo Jungle

America wasn't as into Tokyo Jungle as Europe

Asked how Tokyo Jungle fared outside of Japan, director Yohei Kataoka gave Siliconera a rather discouraging response for us fans in the United States. "Europe loved it, and we got a lot of great feedback from that audience, but [in] America...

 
Far Cry: Blood Dragon photo
Far Cry: Blood Dragon

Is Blood Dragon III: Vietnam War 2 just an April Fools' Day joke?

Look, my attitude to April Fools' Day is that if it looks like bollocks and it sounds like bollocks, then it probably is bollocks. However, after last year's reveal of the amazing Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon on April Fools' Day, I'd be hesitant...

 
Frog Fractions 2 photo
Frog Fractions 2

Is there a Frog Fractions 2 ARG already underway?

The original Frog Fractions was one of the most bizarre things you could play in in a web browser, so it wasn't a surprise to see a potential sequel arrive on Kickstarter last week. What is odd is that, if the Kickstarter is successful, Fro...

 
Dtoid TV photo
Dtoid TV

Live show: Soldier of Fortune: Payback

[Mash Tactics airs Monday through Friday at 4p.m. Pacific on Dtoid.TV. Watch Rick 'King Foom' Olson play a variety of games, each day with its own theme. With a heavy focus on community and viewer interaction, you can be as much a...

 
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8===D

Browse Destructoid with your arrow keys like a boss

Would you like to browse Destructoid posts by just using your arrow keys? Here you go. The tool was created by the folks at Nextly, a cool browser app that lets you skip from one post to another at the click of a key, and also lets you impo...

 
Curiosity photo
Curiosity

Curiosity goes a bit mad with new in-app purchases

I had long since deleted Curiosity from my iPhone after spending admittedly far too much time (see: more than five minutes) tinkering with the cooperative game about chipping away layers of a massive cube. But now, here I am, redownloading ...

 
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8===D

New Dtoid site feature violates Trademark! Help!

Last week Destructoid rolled out a new feature, as requested on our Uservoice forum, that allowed our editors to group clusters of stories together around a specific product (instead of using related tags or creating a tag for every un...

 
Ni no Kuni pee-pee photo
Ni no Kuni pee-pee

I helped a girl take a piss in Ni No Kuni

It wouldn't be fair to say that Ni No Kuni has a specific urination quest. It's more of a side story or side effect of a larger task, if you will.  Nevertheless, when I came upon this girl who needed to whiz, I immediately wrote it off...

 
2 Legit 2 Quit photo
2 Legit 2 Quit
 
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8===D

EVE Online update overhauls bounty hunting

EVE Online is one tough cookie to crack. Sure, it's a massively multiplayer online game. It's also one part space-faring strategy game, business simulator, and space-pirate dream fantasy as well. Much of the game is filled with people that ...

 
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8===D

Peter Molyneux and the curious case of the 50,000 DLC

Peter Molyneux can't simply make a game; it has to be an experiment. With Fable, it appears that he wanted to see how interaction would work when you were restricted to farting or doing a chicken dance. Maybe there was more to it than that....

 
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8===D

Paradox Interactive Con 2012: We're in a castle, b**ch!

Welcome to another installment of Destructoid On Assignment: the extravagant lives of videogame blogging where you, our supportive readers, wish to swiftly murder us for doing cool things nobody should be gainfully employed to do. Ther...

 
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8===D

Get high scores with your urine!

When I'm doing mundane day to day rubbish I frequently wish I was playing videogames. Especially right now, with so many impressive games that have been screaming to be played. However, the few seconds it takes me to empty my bladder has ne...

 
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8===D

Dtoid Comments overhaul cometh! Please update your email

Yep, we're overhauling our comments system at last.  We've tried building our own but the spammers always win, so we're bringing in the big guns.  I'm happy to announce that Dtoid will be powered by Disqus shortly. The new feature...

 
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8===D

PlayStation 3 kiosks freezing up ... on purpose!

Have you ever spent any time in a Best Buy, EB Games, or GameStop playing their PlayStation 3 demo unit and have it freeze up on you? No, you haven't... or so I was told by a Sony rep a few days back. Just before the launch of the PlayStati...

 

Nick ChesterFeatured blogger

Editor-in-Chief @ Destructoid.com nick at destructoid.com

 

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King's Quest: Once Upon a Climb"A tale of two princesses"

 

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Koi"Fish out of water"

 

Severed"Cut my life into pieces / Slash into me"

 

ZEN Pinball 2: Aliens vs. Pinball"Not the Alien's most terrifying incarnation"

 

Alienation"Welcome to Earth"

 

Zenge"Slide, slide, slippity slide"

 
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DISCUSSIONS | setupPosts by everyone - post yours

DanteKinkade

Way too many catgirl things so, welp here is another of the boy <3

 
Parismio

Came back to ds3 and still not being summoned for Its been 20 minutes

 
OverlordZetta

Pokemon Trainers! Out of nowhere, Spain has a Shiny Yveltal event and North America and Europe have a Regular Zygarde event going Dunno if these are ORAS exclusive or if XY are included too, but be sure to grab

 
Lex

So, I heard the Attack on Titan game is coming to the west and has an online component? The models could use some work,

 
iam16bit

Just seeing all these catgirl posts is making me

 
BlazeWii

Things always get whenever I

 
Dr Mel

My job aint But they buy me coffee made the way I like usually without even And thats just

 
Torchman

No comment

 
OverlordZetta

Friendly reminder that dogs

 
MeeGhoulz

you said?Now check whats going on in the couldnt help it!

 
ScionVyse

Gonna finally download Oris Definitive Edition tomorrow, since Im going to a place with internet that I can use to I cant wait to play a better version of my 2015

 
Sailor Zebes

Gotta get in on that cat girl

 
Occams

I could watch public access tv

 
Fuzunga

Before the day is done, have another picture of best cat Bonus bunny girl included!

 
Sir Shenanigans

Sitting down with a lot of coffee and a wee slice of creme brule to WATCH The

 
DSBrad

Beyond Two Souls is no where near as smart as it wants me to think it

 
Torchman

I sometimes wonder if I quickpost too then I tell myself thats a stupid thought and keep

 
Larxinostic

100% convinced the radio station at works controlled by Internet How else to explain Never Gonna Give You Up, then Whats Going On? Yes,

 
DSBrad

Really struggled with Mirrors Edge LOVED Mirrors Edge but the open world slowed the game down so Spent some time discussing this

 
StriderHoang

Im glad Ive decided to be more liberal in spending my SP in Bravely I had 3 SP in Bravely Default literally until the final few hours of True

 
Nekrosys

So theres now a teaser for the third season of the Wakfu animated This makes me very And Mostly With some happy thrown Okay, many kinds of Im currently Just having a Rubbing my

 
Megas75

I dont really have any catgirls to So instead heres RVD turning his head into a spring

 
EdgyDude

Has anyone here played Rabi-Ribi? I heard its a pretty damn solid metroidvania but I have yet to see any more than 2 reviews for The games Steam page is loaded with positive user reviews

 
JayfromtheSun

Lets see what todays quest is in Stardew

 
Inquisitive Ravenclaw

Not sure why, but I get antsy when the devs of an indie game are in the comment section of an article about said

 
Pixie The Fairy

I went with this

 
Nathan D

Tis but a scratch!

 
KeithTheGeek

That feel when you get the sick 0-to-death but then your net cuts out preventing you from saving the

 
DeadMoon

Cat Girl

 

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