Max would date a woman who gets that hype on Taco Bell
In the third part of our ongoing investigative series on what it would be like if heavy metal pioneer Ronnie James Dio was, in fact, a mage in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. In this installment, we forget more lyrics, and Max's girlfriend gets home from work, only to find a very special surprise waiting for her. Is it tacos? (Yes. That's exactly what it is.)
That raccoon is probably Dio's pet in the netherworld
Continuing our adventures through Skyrim; Max lays out the lengthy tale of what he did the day Dio died. Max's romp involved bottomless mimosas, a 40oz of malt liquor with a condom taped to it, and a deformed raccoon named 'Scary'. I don't really remember what I did that day. Probably listened to Dio.
We've been down too long in the midnight sea
Max and I decided to start a playthrough of The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim as the late Ronnie James Dio, the heavy metal legend who had a music video that kinda looks like Skyrim. There's only one problem; Max can't remember any Dio lyrics correctly. It's okay though; we had good beer and bad tacos.
Rorschach is telling you to buy this game
Ever wanted Watchmen's Jackie Earle Haley to taunt you? Now you can with Haley lending his voice as The Evil Within's main antagonist, Ruvik. But he's not the only recognizable celebrity to have climbed aboard The Evil Withi...
The evil contained within slightly less evil than anticipated
So Japan gets the ability to cattle prod moaning, ass-up anime girls and the rest of the world doesn't (quite). Meanwhile, we get a gross out Evil Within, while in Japan it has been edited down. I assume the same people mad a...
ZeniMax is after that Facebook money
ZeniMax sued Oculus VR and founder Palmer Luckey over trade secrets related to the Oculus Rift virtual-reality headset, and now we have the defendants' side of the story.
A representative of Oculus shared the company's court ...
You just knew this was coming
The ZeniMax vs. Oculus VR situation has escalated following comments from both sides about how intellectual property and key technology driving the Oculus Rift virtual-reality headset may or may not have been worked on while ...
Enough news to Baja Blast your brains out
Lots of things happened in the game-o-sphere this week. Kevin Spacey scored the manliest name for his character in Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare. We found out the Halo TV series may be produced in conjunction with Showtime,...
'We are disapointed but not surprised by ZeniMax's actions'
For those just tuning in, ZeniMax Media sent a formal notice of rights to Oculus VR and new parent company Facebook over intellectual property claims. Long story short, ZeniMax feels that work that happened with them carried ...
As a thank you for dealing with gold spammers and bugs
It's been about four weeks since The Elder Scrolls Online launched, so we've reached that fated point in any subscription based MMO's life -- the date where everyone who got their first month free now has to choose ...
Asserts Carmack worked on IP while at id that went into the headset
id Software parent company ZeniMax Media has sent a "formal notice of its legal rights" to Oculus VR and Facebook over intellectual property worked on by chief technology officer John Carmack while he was still at id that Zen...
I will not apologize for the following wordplay
Wolfenstein: The New Order’s new trailer is out, and the good folks at Bethesda play the same segment twice for our amusement: the first, a little like Hitman, and the second time, like Serious Sam. From the moment I s...
It's definitely not for a beverage
Could a new Fallout game or property be in the works? Recently, ZeniMax Media, parent company of Bethesda Softworks, quietly filed three separate trademarks for "Nuka Cola." Delicious and informative, yes?
Nuka Cola is a favo...
It's not in-game
As I've mentioned in my review in progress for The Elder Scrolls Online, the game did not ship with an Auction House -- a system in place in nearly every MMO that allows players to conveniently buy and sell goods within the g...
Info from playtesters
If you play as many MMOs as I do, one of the first questions you'll probably have is "what is the maximum level cap, and how long does it take to reach it?" Well with The Elder Scrolls Online, we may have an answer. According...
Doom 4 with a virtual-reality headset 'would have been a huge win'
As much as I want John Carmack to do good work at Oculus VR, it was sad to see him depart from id Software. In an interview with USA Today, he elaborated on why he chose to leave instead of working at multiple companies simul...
Plus here's a new developer diary
Bethesda announced on their Facebook page that The Elder Scrolls Online will be rated M for Mature. The statement from Bethesda stated the company disagree with the ESRB's rating, but they also "do not plan to challenge" it....
Console versions to follow in June
ZeniMax Online Studios has come out with a suitably memorable release date for The Elder Scrolls Online: April 4, 2014 (aka 4.4.14). That's when the massively multiplayer online role-playing game will arrive on PC and Mac --...
Argonians for life!
I've come to warm up to The Elder Scrolls Online after seeing it at a few different events. One aspect that never disappointed me, even early on, is the MMORPG's character creator. Granted, I wasn't able to dig too deeply, a...
The Destructoid Show pounds the starfish
Hey gang! Here's that darn Destructoid Show again! Hooray!
The news: Steve Ballmer's gonna retire from Microsoft, Elder Scrolls Online has a subscription fee as well as a cash shop, there's some talk about exchanging your cu...
The Destructoid Show does a little dance
Hey gang! I'm back from my important business trip to give you hard-hitting news about video games! Hooray!
Today we talk about Grand Theft Auto Online, which sounds totally nuts, and apparently involves submarines?! Dying L...
The Destructoid Show has to go to the bathroom
Hey everybody! Here's another episode of The Destructoid Show! Because Tuesday!
Some sneaky Redditors have uncovered evidence pointing to the existence of Left 4 Dead 3, Bethesda has finally shown off The Elder Scrolls ...
Dishonored's initial plan
Don't call it steampunk. Or do, but it's not meant to be.
Arkane Studios’ Sebastien Mitton gave a talk at GDC in which he revealed the warmly received Dishonored was originally set to take place in medieval Japan. Mitton continued, “We thought medieval Japan was not goo...
The Destructoid Show makes fun of a giant corporation
Hey guys! Here's today's Destructoid Show.
Big news, in terms of business stuff -- EA's John Riccitiello has resigned from his role as CEO. EA is offering a generous choice of one of eight free games for customers ...
A welcome hybrid of old and new school MMO mechanics
The Elder Scrolls Online has a lot to prove.
Not only does developer Zenimax have to placate the fans of old, and sell them on the idea of a subscription based MMO, but they also have to bring in fans who have never played th...
Most of them will have an endgame 'part two'
A big concern I had going into the Elder Scrolls Online preview was their plans for endgame content, which I drilled Zenimax for information on.
As we all know, MMOs may offer a unique experience at launch, but if they don'...
Breaking news straight from Zenimax
Fans were pretty upset after learning that the first person mode in The Elder Scrolls Online, a feature long time players have been rooting for, would be extremely limited. After all, it's kind of expected with this franchise...
Playable for the first time
With PAX East nearly upon us, Bethesda has given the heads up that The Elder Scrolls Online will be playable this week in Boston. When the game was first announced, some of us who are more into TES than we are traditional MMO...
Elder Scrolls Online beta
See what all the fuss is about
In a recent FAQ, Zenimax answers most of your questions regarding the beta program for The Elder Scrolls Online -- including the announcement that it's coming later this month.
Like most MMO betas these days, later this month...
Elder Scrolls Online beta
Just go to the website and have at it
Bethesda has just let us know that beta signups are happening right now for The Elder Scrolls Online.
All you have to do is go to www.ElderScrollsOnline.com, sign up, and you'll have a chance to get in. All of the detai...