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2:30 PM on 11.30.2012

Wii U is blatantly better than PS3 and Xbox 360 COMBINED

The Wii U has had a chance to settle in North America, and just recently hit shelves in Europe. The question on everybody's lips is, of course -- is the Wii U the best home console in the world, and should I throw away every ...

Jim Sterling


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10:00 AM on 11.16.2012

How Xbox Live is blatantly better than PSN, animated

Thomas Truong, the man responsible for the excellent New Adventures of Podtoid, has been working on another project, and it's quite glorious. He's gone and taken a section of an old article I wrote, How Xbox Live is Blatantl...

Jim Sterling



The Wii is blatantly better than Barack Obama  photo
The Wii is blatantly better than Barack Obama
by Jim Sterling

This year, two reigning incumbents are looking to win themselves a second term of power. I am, of course, talking about president-elect of the United States, Barack Obama, and president-man of the eighth console generation, the Wii home entertainment gaming family device.

Really, the difference between the two situations is practically non-existent. Both became world leaders from humble and unlikely beginnings. Both have won praise and criticism for their unorthodox ways. Both have great marketing departments. Also, Obama said "videogames" once a few years ago, so he is totally videogame-related and that makes this post okay.

Anyway, the point is, this upcoming election is not about Obama vs. Romney. It's clearly about Obama vs. the Wii U, and I urge you all to cast your vote for Nintendo this November. Why? Because the Wii's reign was blatantly better than Barack Obama's reign, and the Wii U shall logically run America better.

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DmC's new Dante is blatantly better than old Dante photo
DmC's new Dante is blatantly better than old Dante
by Jim Sterling

Ninja Theory's redesign of Dante in DmC: Devil May Cry is easily one of the most controversial overhauls in gaming history. Lengthy arguments have been made, explicitly detailing why the new Dante is such a bad character, and yet others vehemently claim Capcom will never get their money again. Opinions are heated.

Opinions are, however, meaningless without me being around to point out the scientifically correct ones. For, indeed, the quality of the new Dante is a scientific fact, not something you can have a so-called "opinion" about. It's like saying the Sun is cold or that birds can't fly -- you can't have your say in this debate, because it's a matter of reality versus fantasy.

The reality is this -- new Dante is blatantly better than old Dante. If you disagree, you're fighting science. 

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How Xbox Live is blatantly better than PSN photo
How Xbox Live is blatantly better than PSN
by Jim Sterling

Since medieval times, humanity has debated, argued, and sometimes even fought over the eternal question -- which company is better, Sony or Microsoft? Angry diatribes have been written and blood has been spilled, but neither man nor beast have found the answer.

However, each side can score points in less encompassing criteria, and it is on these smaller battlefields that the war is being waged in earnest. One of the greatest war zones, the realm of online services, is the most hard-fought, but it's clear who is winning -- Microsoft. Yes, Xbox Live is blatantly better than PlayStation Network.

If you don't believe me, you better shut your stupid mouth before I slap it off your gormless face. I have facts backing me up, you little idiot. What have you got? Sit down, shut up, and listen to the truth that's literally growing out of my head like hair.

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Diablo III is blatantly better than Torchlight II photo
Diablo III is blatantly better than Torchlight II
by Jim Sterling

Diablo III launched a few scant months ago, but its PR snafus and controversial business decisions have soured a fair few players. Meanwhile, Runic Games has sat back and capitalized, as jilted dungeon crawlers look toward Torchlight II and hail it as the answer to their prayers. 

Sadly, however, these poor misguided fools are as misguided as they are poor. They are also foolish. They are poor, misguided, and foolish because only a poor misguided fool who is foolishly misguided would be poor enough to consider Torchlight II anywhere near Diablo III in terms of asskickingness. I swear by the blank check in my shirt pocket that I will defend Activision's beautifully made game against all criticism, because there is one simple truth that you need to understand. 

Diablo III is blatantly better than Torchlight II.

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4:00 PM on 02.28.2010

Deadly Premonition is blatantly better than Heavy Rain

Yesterday we reviewed Deadly Premonition and gave it a score of 10. This comes just weeks after we reviewed Heavy Rain and gave it a score of 7. Obviously, this means one thing. We love the Xbox 360 and want to have sex with ...

Jim Sterling

4:00 PM on 02.09.2010

How Aliens are blatantly better than Predators

Aliens vs. Predator is out next week, and while opinions are divided as to whether or not the game will be any good, there is one universal truth that cannot be denied -- Aliens are blatantly better than Predators. This is an...

Jim Sterling

4:00 PM on 01.17.2010

How Darksiders is blatantly better than Zelda

Darksiders is considered by many to be a great game, albeit one that suffers from an intense case of plagiarism. Comparisons to the The Legend of Zelda run amok, with even the game's developer, Vigil, happily confessing to bo...

Jim Sterling

4:00 PM on 12.06.2009

FFXIII Xbox 360 will be blatantly better than FFXIII PS3

At E3 2008, Square Enix shocked the world by claiming that, for the first time, a major Final Fantasy installment would be coming to the Xbox 360. Previously a PS3 exclusive, Final Fantasy XIII was the jewel in the crown of t...

Jim Sterling

4:00 PM on 10.11.2009

How Bayonetta is blatantly hotter than your girlfriend

Any man with a sane penis will acknowledge that Bayonetta, star of Platinum Games' Bayonetta, is the hottest female to have ever been invented. From the sexy giraffe legs to those prim-yet-sultry librarian specs, Bayonetta is...

Jim Sterling





2:00 PM on 09.13.2009

Why the PSP is blatantly better than the DS

It's an established fact that if you like one thing, you must hate everything else. You cannot enjoy two of any similar item in this world, which is why bisexuality has been scientifically proven not to exist. With this in mi...

Jim Sterling

5:20 PM on 08.03.2009

How Fat Princess is blatantly better than Feminism

Titan Studios' Fat Princess was released this week and, server issues aside, it's great fun. Stuffing princesses full of cake and utilizing the game's varied and fun classes makes for an incredible fun online experience. Howe...

Jim Sterling

3:00 PM on 07.05.2009

How Pokemon Red is blatantly better than Pokemon Blue

Pokémon Red is blatantly better than Pokémon Blue and if you disagree with me you are a spastic. Some of you may feel that one can't successfully draw discrepancies between two games that are essentially the sam...

Jim Sterling

1:00 PM on 06.14.2009

How Prototype is blatantly better than inFAMOUS

Two games have recently been released that bear several striking similarities. Both of these games are open-world sandbox titles featuring superpowered antiheroes who begin to realize a host of awesome abilities with which to...

Jim Sterling

5:20 PM on 03.02.2009

How Killzone 2 is blatantly better than Halo 3

Killzone 2 launched exclusively for the PlayStation 3 this Friday, generating much bias from biased people who are biased. It also sold quite a few copies and has been setting the PlayStation Network afire with grenade spam a...

Jim Sterling