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#Also cocks

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The Elder Scrolls V: Penisfinger

Thanks to the Destructoid community blogs, I now cannot look at this formerly beautiful screenshot of The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim without seeing a terrible truth. That truth is the unquestionable penisfinger standing proud on the end of tha...

 
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Destructoid shirts will protect your torso from sun rays!

Sun rays are bad! Didn't you know? The government secretly created videogames to keep people inside and away from the sun after all. Still, you sometimes have to leave the the house for things like candy brain fuel. Lucky for you, Destructo...

 
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Hey! Watch this episode of This Week in Videogames!

Last week I was a guest on web talk show This Week in Videogames. I am not posting this video of the episode to put the focus on me – I can’t even watch myself on video for more than five seconds without throwing up. I really w...

 
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Here is Sega's game machine, control it with your pee

I don't know who it was that came up with the idea to paint a little fly or dot or target on the inside bowl of your average public urinal, but he (or she) was a genius. It took advantage of man's need to urinate, and combined it with man...

 
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Tune in to GameTrailers TV tonight to see me NAKED!

Not really. I have a t-shirt on. I just can’t wait for my parents to Google my name and see that headline show up in the results. But I will be on GameTrailers TV tonight! I was one of the “gaming experts” (fan...

 
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Gather around old man Niero: Destructoid turns four

Friday night, 11pm at the Destructoid + Astro party:   "HEY! HEEEEY! SHUT UP! YOU! QUIEEEET!" Then, again, somehow in unison: "SHUT THE F**K UP! WE'RE GOING TO MAKE AN ANNOUNCEMENT!" (Here's the party in pictures) Today marks a...

 
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Gears of Whores is a real thing and is utterly dismaying

"Finally, porn for the XXX-treme gamer in you!" Not my words, but the words of GearsOfWhores.com, a new Web site dedicated to gamer porn. Of course, by gamer porn I mean, "low budget porn stars doing their normal sex but wearing headsets wh...

 
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A Dtoider won that No More Heroes 2 t-shirt contest!

I've been sitting on this info for a little while, waiting to get a proper screen grab of the two winning t-shirts in action, but my screen grabbing equipment sucks and I can't wait any longer. So here there are, the two winners of the No M...

 
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Analyzing No More Heroes 2, part 1: The bosses

[These posts on No More Heroes 2 are purely speculation. I have no idea what the team at Grasshopper Manufacture intended for the game to mean; I can only speak to what I've taken away from it, so if you don't enjoy potentially bullsh*t int...

 
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Jeff Minter pitches Video Game Hero

Space Giraffe developer and notorious industry whingebag Jeff Minter has been hard at work on a new game that he is hoping to pitch to Activision. Not really, but his idea for Video Game Hero could be a pretty good prospect nonetheless. Sur...

 
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Genitals ruin Christmas with help from PSP

Shon Goodman of Omaha, Nebraska thought he had his holiday shopping all worked out when he picked up the used PSP at a local store. Little did he know that the handheld contained a horrible secret that would destroy Christmas for his ten ye...

 
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From our community  

Handys X-mas X-travaganza begins now!

[Handy created this awesome Destructoid themed Christmas poem! Merry Christmas from everyone at Destructoid!] It’s that time of year again. The time of year when we forget about all our problems and just try to enjoy ourselves for one...

 
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ESRB: Dante's Inferno contains demon penis

Oh yes, it's that time again! Time for another brilliant ESRB rating. We've had Street Fighter IV's flexed gluteus, Mass Effect 2's future blouse, and Final Fantasy XIII's breast side portions. Now the ESRB has given us the most amazing men...

 
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The return of the F**khead: No More Heroes 2 ESRB listing

We haven't heard too much about No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle lately, which had me worried that the game wasn't going to make its January 2010 launch date. Seeing the ESRB rating for the game has put those worries to rest. Unless the...

 
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Tim Langdell is a dick, indies respond...from the EDGE

Tim Langdell, founder of EDGE Games and former IDGA board member, is evidently not a big believer in freedom of speech -- at least, not in respect to the word "edge."  After managing to remove Mobigames' EDGE from the iPhone app store ...

 
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Water Sports coming to the Wii

There is only one reason why I chose to run this story. You already know exactly what that reason is.

 
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Katamari Forever launch trailer is ... uh, yeah

I'm sure you all remember the first trailer for Katamari Forever that Joseph posted a while back. It had a monkey in it, which is really the only reason I remember. Above, you'll find the new launch trailer for the game, which also features...

 
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Penultimate experience in gaming arrives in Love Death 4

You knew it was coming. You knew that one day man would devise a way to control videogames with his penis. We think with it most of the time. Most of the games we play have something to do with proving who has the bigger wang, and let's not...

 
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Nier Replicant will be getting sexy hermaphrodite fun

Nier Replicant has been revealed has been revealed as a PS3-exclusive version of Square Enix's upcoming action RPG, while Nier Gestalt will be an alternative Xbox 360 version. We don't yet know if the two games will have some form of intera...

 
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Send a greeting with some Dissidia flavor

Have you been stuck sending greeting cards without Final Fantasy characters all over them? I know, me too. It's a tough world for us gamers. A world in which we are forced to send electronic greeting cards without our favorite Final Fantasy...

 
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Gackt getting sexy body involved with Samurai Warriors 3

I have a big fat wobbly man-crush on Gackt, and really, who could blame me? The androgynous Japanese singer looks quite unbelievable, and I have made a mission in life to mack Gackt's sack, whether he grants me permission or not. Further pr...

 
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Watch Mindfreak, get free couch in Home

Are you tired of sitting on things not shaped like coffins in your virtual home in Home? It's just a pain, isn't it? But who wants to go out and buy a virtual something shaped like a coffin? There's the awkward looks from the virtual store ...

 
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Warner Bros. hands a rose to The Bachelor videogame

Yup, this is happening.Warner Bros. Interactive Entertainment and Ludia announced today that they will be creating videogames based on the hit reality shows The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. According to the press release, the games will b...

 
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Lars Von Trier's Antichrist getting the game treatment

Antichrist, Danish director Lars Von Trier's newest film, hit Cannes this year and divided critics more than two rival console fanboys arguing over which system should be able to use the only outlet left in the house. Some thought it was a ...

 
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Podtoid 100: Podtoid 100

Yay. You can listen to it here, or subscribe to us on iTunes.- Do you people really want a Sportstoid podcast? Really? - Adam Dork's Podtoid soundboard- We retrospect the hell out of everything- Why the hell is Topher on this podcast - Sami...

 
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Videogames are stupid and babyish, states 'games journalist'

A group of "videogame journalists" scaled a soapbox this past week at GDC in order to rant about the industry and bad jurnalizmz, basically calling out everyone and everything in existence. While a lot of it seemed to be self-sati...

 
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GTA IV's male nudity sparks controversy: Anti-game groups run like cockwork

The self-styled "media watchdogs" are so very predictable. No sooner has Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned been released for download, than the moral fearmongers get up in arms about it. Responding to the GTA DLC's full-fro...

 
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Left 4 Bed: Post-Valentine Priapism

Offworlder Joel Johnson spotted this over in the Bay Area Craigslist personals while cruising for a "casual encounter".  You know: bowling shirts, some brewskis, couple games of Fumble the Crumble (peach). FRWARGGHH GHUURR (L...

 
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A guy gets his knob out in GTA IV: The Lost and Damned

Hey you! Like GTA IV? Love penis? Then you'll be thrilled to know that Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned comes complete with a pubic mushroom and all the trimmings. That's good to know. I can already hear the likes of Jack Thompson a...

 
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Presenting the pinnacle of gaming controllers: Your schlong

I suspect just about everyone has made the joke comparing male genitals to a joystick at some point. Some people take it further than others.Take the guys at SF Media Labs, for example. They have devised a way to transform a tadger into an ...

 

Conrad ZimmermanFeatured blogger

An avid player of tabletop and video games throughout his life, Conrad has a passion for unique design mechanics and is a nut for gaming history. He can be heard on the comedy podcast () and str...

 

Reviews

The Climb"You rock, rock"

 

Soda Drinker Pro"Like explaining an inside joke to someone else"

 

King's Quest: Once Upon a Climb"A tale of two princesses"

 

Stories: The Path of Destinies"Choose your own adventure/death"

 

Koi"Fish out of water"

 

Severed"Cut my life into pieces / Slash into me"

 

ZEN Pinball 2: Aliens vs. Pinball"Not the Alien's most terrifying incarnation"

 

Alienation"Welcome to Earth"

 

Zenge"Slide, slide, slippity slide"

 
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DISCUSSIONS | setupPosts by everyone - post yours

Sarah Jane Farron

Theres been lots of talk of cat I play a cat lady in FFXIV so Ill post my character! I really need to get back to this

 
GundamJehutyKai

Curious about Koihime Enbu, theres an EU stream on now with possible key giveaways

 
Inquisitive Ravenclaw

I just remembered: Free Comic Book Day is in a week! Theres a lot this year I dont recognize (and no Mouse Guard for some reason), but there are more than a few familiar favorites,

 
Torchman

Ama blog? Sounds like it could be

 
Fuzunga

Whats that you say? You want me to post MORE pictures of Blake? Well, if you

 
DanteKinkade

Cute foxy Yousuke, and yes more then just cuddling

 
Nathan D

Good lord, heavy drinking really makes me go balls to the wall, with blatant disregard for my girly Hunters I hardly ever use that many Next up on my Skill build, run like a crazy person through the Hunters Nightmare just to get the

 
Roxas1359

Saw the Ratchet and Clank movie It has its problems but its not nearly as bad as critics are making it out to Ive definitely seen

 
Vadicta

Weve finally made it into the world of

 
Parismio

Ive been putting this off for too long but Im disapponted yall didnt mention the actual best catgirl:

 
Scrustle

I beat the boss of Farron Keep in Such a cool boss, which had me wishing that I could use the same move Luckily you can get their weapon from their soul! So Im levelling up strength so I can wield

 
Gamemaniac3434

Ive done I have so very Bask in my Unless you desu WITNESS MY ASCENDANCY!!! HAHAHAHAA!!!!!!!!!

 
Chris Bradshaw

Shits getting weird around

 
gajknight

Im not a fan of Calvin Harris music, at But man, this track from 2007 is Why cant he make more of that stuff?

 
ChrisHannard

Well, that was an unexpected turn for the

 
EdgyDude

PSA: Only 48 hours left in GOGs sale, go check it and grab whatever you like before its over

 
Torchman

500 Fuck Now how to celebrate this milestone of glory?

 
hlarge4

My last day of gaming before baby arrives and power is out while construction is being Le sigh

 
BlazeWii

Oh hewro! I write animu blog 4

 
Inquisitive Ravenclaw

Cant we just admit that ALL catgirls are clawsome!?

 
KnickKnackMyWack

For NX I can see Nintendo charging a premium like PSN+ during the PS3 days, but my gut tells me they wont lock online multiplayer behind a I think the service would be a little cheaper

 
SpielerDad

I just dropped my Persol sunglasses into a public I should just burn them now, right?

 
jake oti

You guys could stand to listen to more people talk about the NX/Zelda news, right?

 
Torchman

We interrupt your stream of catgirls to show you a mech turning into a giant That is

 
Lex

As someone else Catgirls are not always just fun and Sometimes they are also a fetish one could and possibly should die

 
Vadicta

A whole day of cat girls goes by, and no one mentioned the actual only and truly best one there is? This is true

 
EdgyDude

All this talk about catgirls and no one has mentioned the best one there is? you disappoint me Dtoid

 
ShadeOfLight

I just opened a temple door by reflecting sunlight off the bare midriffs of beach-going girls, who I convinced to take their clothes off by filling a pool with the saliva of a giant Also, ham was Video games!

 
JDelwynn

Need for Speed is bad at making first First it crashes in the very first race, and after I choose Play Alone, it boots me back to the main menu because it cant connect to a The future of gaming is here folks!

 

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