Ok, maybe I'm being a bit melodramatic. After all, the news I just came across isn't even Boll-ian in nature. Still, having Paul W.S. Anderson now attached to direct the upcoming action-racer-to-film adaptation is the Hollywood equivalent of having your little brother trip over the controller cable right when you reach the boat level. Unfortunately, your parents are home, and they're still upset about last week when you broke his nose over a game of Gyromite.

You may remember Mr. Anderson from films such as Aliens vs Predator and Resident Evil. Two flicks that should have been amazingly fantastic, yet managed to bore the hell out of anyone lacking a cocaine nosebleed. If you need it stated more simply, Paul managed to make the Predator, a creature defined primarily by his ability to have sex with your mom, punch your dad in the face, and steal your brother's Camaro, all while invisible and shooting razor-sharp nets, boring!

This does not bode well for Spy Hunter ...

[Via AICN] 

Legacy Comments (will be imported soon)

Knivy

No car crash pic?

Anyway, I never saw alien vs predator, missed it on opening weekend and then heard from friends that it sucked, so never watched it.

Also, Spy Hunter: The movie should be a guy playing it for 2 1/2 hours :P.

Aaron Mxy Yost

This movie was doomed as soon as the Rock was attached to it. The Rundown was cool though.

Knivy

And his weapon of choice!

Aaron Mxy Yost

bleep

Knivy

@Bleep
You need more cowbell

tazarthayoot

@Mxy

You're crazy. The way that The Rock stares mockingly, and hits someone, and then stares at them mockingly, and then makes a witty comment, and then STARES AT THE MOCKINGLY!

I have to go change my pants now.

TheStripe

Someone has a samoan eyebrow fetish.

TheStripe

Someone has a samoan eyebrow fetish.

Rockvillian

Yes I want to tell him... your mouth looks like a vagina!!!!! But honestly, your vagina was much easier on the eyes in the original Predator than Retard Aliens vs Emo Predator vs Ethnic Woman

trydizon

i fancy the predator's fishnets.

hawt.

Aaron Mxy Yost

Did someone say mouth that look like a vagina?

LongCat

I'm still surprised they jumped the gun and released the game based on the movie, that still hasn't been released. I haven't played it yet, but the last time a game that was made based on a movie, that was based on a game sucked bollocks. Yeah, remember Street Fighter: The Movie Game? It was horrible, beyond anything I ever played.

But back on topic, I'm not sure how they're going to do a story on SpyHunter. All I remember about the arcade game is it was an overhead racing type game where you blast baddies on the road.

What's next, a movie based on Road Blasters? o_O

BlindsideDork

Hey...I posted this story earlier today....sup with that yo? :P

tazarthayoot

From the people who brought you White Chicks, Magnolia, and Alone in the Dark, comes Custer's Revenge: The Movie

SLiFE

Paul "Weak Sauce" Anderson?
Everything that man touches is gold.