Yeah, you're l33t as hell. You can trounce waves of fearsome baddies without breaking a sweat. You've made your friends scream in anguish over Xbox Live and humiliated them with your mad skills. Little girls cry at the mention of your name. Somewhere in your past though, there's a filthy secret: The boss you just cannot beat. Tonight, I came face to face with one of mine.
I spent hours trying to beat Soda Popinski as a kid. I hurled the controller across the room in a fury as he laughed in my face as if to say, "You will never beat me, you pathetic weiner!" I saw him in my dreams, chasing me and eventually catching me and crunching me up in his frightning, oversized Russian mouth. Ok, actually I made that part up ... but I did read on Wikipedia that his name was changed from Vodka Drunkenski to avoid the stereotype of Russians being alcoholics. Not that it matters either way, because he still haunts me even as I watch my friends defeat him with ease. I know, he's easy. Please don't tell me.
Are you brave enough to show Destructoid your weak spot? The bosses in your past that you can't beat, no matter how many times you try?
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Contest:
3:23 AM on 01.03.2007
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I spent maybe an hour or two a day for a week straight trying to defeat her, coming close often but never winning. I finally just gave up and sold the game out of frustration.
Of course, the game IS backwards compatible... perhaps it is time to try again...
I hate those freaking jellyfish so much! :'(
More recently, I can't beat the backgammon mission in Clubhouse Games. I suck hard at backgammon.
Cheers!
The original Metroid though, for the NES, there's one boss I never beat. I also never beat any of the Weapons from FFVII, which I don't own anymore so that might be a while (or never happen).
Dr. Wily's final form in Mega Man 7 always game me a run for my money, but that wasn't as much of a childhood problem as it is for me now.
JESUS CHRIST!!!! The fucking KELP that would shock you over, and over, and over, and over. . . grrrrrrrrr - I haven't thought about that mayhem in years and now the mere mention leaves me ready to punch babies!!!!
I really can't think of any other boss that held me back for as long as he.
I don't have enough games with bosses in :(
The Dragon twins in River City Ransom gave me a hell of a fight before I bested them, too. <3 RCR and its DS port.
FWIW, my wallet's weakpoint is Square-Enix games. Even remakes. (Massive damage, lawlz)
Stop healing yourself!
I remember my eyes beginning to tear up because I was giving everything my little heart could muster... eventually I was broken and i threw the controller at the NES causing it to reset and flashing pretty colors on my screen.
Okay, why the hell were those guys so much harder than the end boss? You get to the top floor and that Double Dragon theme plays...urgh, that was some scary shit.
Aside from the twins, the toughest boss for me was Donkey Kong. I mean, every time I got close enough to make my move, he'd grab Pauline and climb up that ladder.
I hate him and his son.
The controller lands right on the reset button and I missed the whole thing. It's a lot more outrageous when you take in to account that it was the 1st generation Gensis. The reset button is almost impossible to even hit with fingers and the controller was so rounded.
Needless to say, I beat the Genesis within an inch of it's life and every game it played afterwards was tinted red and fuzzy. (I like to think it was console blood.)
I wrote too much. I'm sorry.
Hell to the yes dude. Give that bitch a good cunt punt!
Besides her i''m gonna throw in the last boss from Beyond Good and Evil and that whole last level in Metal Slug 3.
Golden Sun, couldn't beat the fucking Fusion Dragon, because I saved after the elevator. Stupid point of no return.
Diddy Kong Racing, the second (I believe) Wizpig race. When I was little, I played this game for weeks to get that far, then got frustrated and almost broke my controller. Then I curled up into a ball and cried. Just recently, a friend gave me the damn game for Christmas, and after playing for five hours I'm up to the first Wizpig.
I can't beat him. D:
Only other game...Shining Force II on GameGear. There wasn't a boss I couldn't beat, I just got to the end and the game reseted on me.
Oh and like, the 3rd level in battle toads, god battletoads was such a bitch to get anywhere in, never mind the bosses
Oh, and props to Cloudiroth on the Tyson Code. I thought Tyson was 10 times harder than Popinski, although, that damn "Moose Mating Call" or whatever he did, really got under my skin.
Amazing thing is, my little brother did it when he was only 8. Incredible.
No matter how many lives I saved up throughout the game the boss right before the last boss (kind of a double) would either wipe me out entirely or leave me with no hope of competing with the last boss :(
I went back years later and completed it, but the nightmares went on for 13 years :(
Also Sigma from Mega Man X. It was a rental, and it just wasn't worth it.
Ikari Warriors. Anyone ever beat that WITHOUT A,B,B,A? I'd like to shake your hand...
X Samus at the end of Metroid Fusion I thought was nearly impossible until 4-5 days later when I finally found a pattern that worked. I was angry about it though and still am.
And the last boss from metal arms took me a couple of weeks to take down and that was simply b/c I could not figure out what to do.
Recent (ish) mention goes to Shin Akuma in Capcom vs SNK 2. Try beating that bitch with a Gamecube d-pad.
what about akuma in SF2T, not only was he a pain in the ass to actually GET to,(secret boss), the double air fireball totally dominated matches
I also echo the comments about the TMNT water level. That was freakin' hard. And then there's this part in Tales of Phantasia for the SNES where you have to press a button and then run like hell to a door that opens up farther up the screen. I never could get the timing right and spent the time inventing swear words instead.
And oh, first Dtoid post and stuff!
Are you serious? I demanded an NES for Xmas when it was first released, just to play Kung-Fu.
Mr. X is simple - kneel and kick. Over and over again. Easiest boss in the history of bosses. The midget magician on the other hand was totally a douche.