Quantcast
Silent Hill Arcade is like playing vomit - Destructoid




Game database:   #ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ         ALL     Xbox One     PS4     360     PS3     WiiU     Wii     PC     3DS     DS     PS Vita     PSP     iOS     Android


Silent Hill Arcade is like playing vomit


5:52 PM on 07.16.2007



I'm a big supporter of IPs staying true to their origins. Paul Anderson's vision of Resident Evil? Raul Julia's vision of M. Bison? Uwe Boll's vision of anything? As a devout gamer, I kinda take them personally.

Take Star Wars for instance. How do you think fans of Star Wars would like it if somebody took the classic trilogy and just shat all over it with sequels so bad they'd be laughable if only you weren't comatose with awe by the fact that somebody could screw one of the most beloved franchises in film history up so completely, and then try to act as if they had done something to be proud of. That's like if your dog came in to the living room and just projectile diarrheaed all over you, your new girlfriend, and your brand new HDTV, and then awaited a bone and perhaps a platinum-studded collar for "treating" you to such a spectacular display of awesomeness and originality.

Jesus Christ, what the hell was I talking about? Oh yeah, Silent Hill. Like Resident Evil Umbrella Chronicles, Silent Hill Arcade is an extremely unnecessary spin on the classic survival horror series. Whereas you spend most of your time in Silent Hill with a crowbar or sledgehammer, now you are equipped with guns and an unlimited supply of bullets. Hmm, I guess that's the same thing.

And don't worry about getting scared either, because due to the nature of arcade games you're going to move along at a brisk pace while player two screams at pretty much everything. Gone are the moments of wandering down a dark hallway only to hear the static on your radio become increasingly louder. Gone is the complex and emotionally compelling story. Gone is the anticipation and terror, or pretty much everything that makes Silent Hill what it is. But you know, why make an original arcade game that actually makes sense when you can just rape and pillage an existing title that is cherished by gamers across the world?

Anyway, hit the jump for more projectile diarrhea. I'm done. 
Thanks to Zak Bentz for ruining my life! 





Comments not appearing? Anti-virus apps like Avast or some browser extensions can cause this.
Easy fix: Add   [*].disqus.com   to your software's white list. Tada! Happy comments time again.

Did you know? You can now get daily or weekly email notifications when humans reply to your comments.



Review: Size DOES Matter photo
Review: Size DOES Matter
3:00 PM on 09.15.2014






Arcade

5:30 PM on 09.17.2014
Like Robotron and Smash TV? You might dig Iron Fisticle

Silly name aside -- and, you know, at least it's memorable -- I'm all about Iron Fisticle. This is a twin-stick shooter inspired by the likes of Robotron, Gauntlet, and Smash TV, which are such terrific games to borrow from ...more



2:30 PM on 09.16.2014
Possibly seizure-inducing arcade racer The Collider smashes into Steam today

Shortbreak Studios, a part of Techland (Dead Island, Call of Juarez), has just released its PC port of the iOS and Android arcade racer The Collider today on Steam. You might recognize that name as the studio behind the mobi...more



3:00 PM on 09.15.2014
Review: Size DOES Matter

Simple graphics, twitch gameplay, and fresh music constitute a good formula for mobile gaming. Titles like this allow for a quick bit of play during minutes of downtime, and can paradoxically keep players going for long perio...more



View all Arcade






Back to Top




All content is yours to recycle through our Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing requiring attribution. Our communities are obsessed with videoGames, movies, anime, and toys.

Living the dream since March 16, 2006

Advertising on destructoid is available: Please contact them to learn more