7:45 PM on 01.20.2007
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Niero
Oh, you crazy Japanese developers. Here's a clip sure to piss off half of the internet and make the other half run for lotion and a tissue. The object of Sexy Beach 3 is apparently to interrupt a bikini woman's rest of a secluded beach by groping her until she has an orgasm. In other words, if you've ever wanted to know what it was like to be a dirty old Japanese man, you can now practice for the job at home.
Warning: not safe for work, home, or backyard bushes. This is dirty stuff. The game was released last quarter and is available online for peanuts if you know where to look (hint hint). Check out 30 Sexy Beach 3 videos and screenshots in the gallery below. If this is your kind of thing, I you might want to see this.
LAUNCH GALLERY (30 IMAGES)
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Contest:
then played the expansion disk
loved that too!
it was ok but not very deep
so easy that got bored of it in 30 mins
( note: beat one girl's story then you can go to the hotel and raise the other girl's levels up to the max lvl where you can yada yada yada... )
x-change 2 and 3 are the best H games I've played and enjoyed
http://tinypic.com/view/?pic=4brnupl
this works for evey thing so you can unlock them without an doing anything but clicking menus
Anyway,
All these chicks... Are japanese chicks naturally that oily? All H-anime or CG games I see pictures of, there's these oily boobed women. It there no talcum powder over there? Is boob rash a problem? I mean, if it's that much of a problem, lets leave Saudi Arabia alone. I'm all for a national effort for us to all go to Japan and drill their women for oil.
Double entendre or political message? You decide...
and yes the girls acually do tan
The platform game in DOAX2, that's a whole platform.
This one blows my mind. How's a chick going to keep her balance on this?
http://www.illusion.jp/sb3_plus/img/cap_cg23.jpg
fucking Japanese, the most perverted bastards on earth. I love 'em!
The other thing is those breasts were almost like an entirely different creature perched on her freak body. And the disembodied hand reminded me of Lynch's Eraserhead.
Weird.
And largely pointless.
I'd say just seeing about 10 seconds of the trailer pretty much gives me as much as I'd like to see of that game.
However, videogaming a virtual person to orgasm should DEFINITELY be the next huge gaming genre. Call it... Wiigasm.
However, I'd like to see a Katamari type game where you roll up like FIFTY women and bring them all into a giant, ball-like orgasm. Or some sort of Metal Gear type stealthgasm gaming, where you sneak up on (male or female) terrorists and bring them to orgasm...
In a cardboard box.
Or better yet.
A game where you run around firing beams at people that bring them to orgasm instead of killing them. How funny would that be? Imagine Gears of War except all of those zombie dudes collapse in spasms of herky jerky bliss?
Of course, that would never fly because blowing a sticky red hole through someone's face is considered entertainment while sex is considered sick and wrong.
WHAT?!
Reality is far better
Are you kidding me? I'd spend good money to find a girl who would reproduce them at the right time.
Why do I know this? Because I had to review it. :(
http://tinypic.com/view/?pic=4brnupl
"Upload yours" is a nice caption!
By the way, speaking of stealth meeting sex, I had an idea of a game about a rubber robot doll in a world dominated with feminist women who enslaved the men, not allowing them to have sex. So she pleasures the men, freeing them. It was called Rubber Zina, and I had a working prototype, which, unfortunately, was lost along with my IBM XT.
You say sex robot like that's a bad thing and not, in actual fact, the coolest damn thing ever known to man.
I'd let Mr Destructoid 'do' my sister any day.