For once in my life, I actually attempted to read the the (f**king) manual that came with the PS3's first party MagicGate (PS2) memory card adapter and like Johnnie Cochran's Chewbacca defense, it did not make sense. You would think that attaching an accessory as basic as this would just work out of the box. Wrong!  Sony -- I know you have loyalties to the guy that designed VCR programming, but it's time you cut him loose already. This was rocket surgery!

All jokes aside, setting up a PS2 memory card on a PS3 actually does take more steps than setting up the console itself.  It also requires the curiosity of a monkey willing to prod around, poking at things randomly until something happens. In the midst of my struggle I tried looking on the internet for answers, but most of the sites I found only got me halfway through the process where the data was in, but the games couldn't see it. I swore that if I ever figured it out, I'd put it online with pictures and step by step instructions. Thus, this article is dedicated to the next irritated bastard attempting to figure it out.

Step 1: Plug in your PS2 memory card into the adapter, then plug the adapter into the USB port. It does not come with one but you can use the same cord that you use for Sixaxis. Don't expect anything to happen. There will be no Windows "boo-bump!" sound. It will just sit there like a coconut.

STEP 2:  Don't look for your memory card in the utilities, storage, accessories, or any menu that actually makes sense. The PS2 memory card icon and it's utility will appear under the "Games" menu.  

You can't use a PS2 memory card directly; this is was a published let down from last year. Instead, you must import the data into the hard drive as a virtual 8MB volume. I'm more than happy to embrace new technologies, so here we go! 

STEP 3:  Assign a slot.  You can give the virtual memory card a name, a slot number, all that good stuff. Unfortunately, some video games will not give a damn about what you're about to do in this step. You will have to do this twice in a completely different menu later. I learned this through osmosis, which only required much self-yelling and raising fists at the sky.

Yeah, it seems like it's working but wait till you start that PS2 game up!
 

Ok, so you have your virtual memory card created. Try to play your PS2 game.  

SQUACK!!! 

Seriously, I nearly punched my PS3 when I saw this. But you said! You said!!!  Here's the solution: have to assign slots again. 

MYSTERIOUSLY HIDDEN STEP 4:  Hold down the P button for five seconds to get the quit game menu and a new "Assign Slots" button will appear there.  This will let you select your virtual memory card. So the other slot thing you did apparently went ignored or isn't compatible with Final Fantasy XII. Good thing it's an old unpopular game! Oh, wait.

STEP 4.1: Follow the same steps and full memory card emulation will be complete. Praise Allah.
 

At the very least, this is all software related junk from a first generation console launch that can be fine tuned and corrected in the long run. Xbox Live, it is not. More than anything, I'm just happy it's there and it works. The lack of instructions in both print and on-screen made the installation experience difficult, but if you're like me and are damned determined to finally back up years and years of PS2 merits and continue them on your PS3, the journey is ultimately  worth it. The adapter retails for roughly $20 online and the instructions are on me.