Note: iOS 9 + Facebook users w/ trouble scrolling: #super sorry# we hope to fix it asap. In the meantime Chrome Mobile is a reach around
hot  /  reviews  /  videos  /  cblogs  /  qposts

Tomb Raider

Rhianna Pratchett writing the Tomb Raider reboot

10:30 AM on 07.12.2012 // Jim Sterling
  @JimSterling

[This post will come in two varieties: Standard and Cynical Collector's Edition. Following is the Dry version.]

Crystal Dynamics has announced that writer Rhianna Pratchett is on board to pen the narrative for the upcoming Tomb Raider reboot. Prior works The daughter of legendary novelist Terry Pratchett, Rhianna has contributed to various games including Mirror's Edge, Overlord, and Prince of Persia

"I grew up playing Tomb Raider, uncovering the world’s secrets and unearthing its treasures; I have lived and died as Lara Croft, but nothing comes close to the challenge of re-writing her," said the freshly announced lead writer. "Seldom do we get the opportunity to reimagine and reinvent a legend, so getting my narrative hands on Miss Croft was a once-in-a-life-time opportunity. It was going back to the genesis of videogame action heroines and exploring how to make such an iconic character meaningful and relatable for gamers today."

Pratchett's a solid writer, so that should be pretty good.

[Now, the Cynical version.]

Crystal Dynamics, furthering its attempts to distance itself from the word "rape" and any other tender gender issues, has announced Rhianna Pratchett, a woman, as the lead writer of the game. The studio has made extra careful that everybody knows that a woman is writing the game, therefore every controversy is now null and void. 

"I grew up playing Tomb Raider, uncovering the world’s secrets and unearthing its treasures; I have lived and died as Lara Croft, but nothing comes close to the challenge of re-writing her," said the freshly announced lead writer, who is a woman writer and will write a woman character with her woman's hands. "Seldom do we get the opportunity to reimagine and reinvent a legend, so getting my narrative hands on Miss Croft was a once-in-a-life-time opportunity. It was going back to the genesis of videogame action heroines and exploring how to make such an iconic character meaningful and relatable for gamers today."

"Many people think we are using women's issues as a cynical marketing ploy, but we're totes not, brah," someone at Crystal probably said. "Did you know, for example, that we actually KNOW some women? I'm not shitting you, son. I know about three of them and have even kissed one. We're letting one of them work on the game and also we have a Stevie Wonder LP in the cafeteria so we're not racist either." 

Patchett's a woman, so Crystal Dynamics isn't in trouble in anymore.



Jim Sterling, Former Reviews Editor
 Follow Blog + disclosure JimSterling Tips
Destructoid reviews editor, responsible for running and maintaining the cutting edge videogame critique that people ignore because all they want to see are the scores at the end. Also a regular f... more   |   staff directory



 Setup email comments

Unsavory comments? Please report harassment, spam, and hate speech to our community fisters, and flag the user (we will ban users dishing bad karma). Can't see comments? Apps like Avast or browser extensions can cause it. You can fix it by adding *.disqus.com to your whitelists.

destructoid's previous coverage:
Tomb Raider


  Mar 06

Post PS4, Xbox One release, Tomb Raider sales crossing 6M

5-6 million was the first month expectation -- it's taken a year


  Jan 17

The Tomb Raider reboot is finally profitable

Square Enix initially expected to sell 5-6 million units


  Jan 14

Tomb Raider: Definitive Edition comparison video

With blow-by-blow commentary from my wife


View all:powered by:  MM.Elephant

Ads on destructoid may be purchased from:



Please contact Crave Online, thanks!


Video Gaming Bits -- Rampage: Total Destruction

Roses are black, PS4 lights are blue; This is a game, and it has valkyries too?

Cblogs of 02/10/16 and WONDER-isms

Modern face of survival horror

Discussion Discussion on Games

PStoid Episode 38: Doomed from the Box Art

Cblogs of 2/9/16 - Only Slightly Late Edition

Narrative Mistakes: Mass Effect's Reapers As Primary Villains

Journey to Become a Jedi Knight - Jedi Outcast

Waifu Wars - The End

 Add your impressions

 Quickposts
Status updates from C-bloggers

Gameous avatarGameous
Quby - The Cube Jumper
Cannibal Steven avatarCannibal Steven
I know I'm making a 4th post by doing this, but for some reason my quickpost posted as multiples... Apologies for the clogging.
Cannibal Steven avatarCannibal Steven
We don't do Friday Night Fights anymore right? Any DTOIDers have Battlefront or WiiU parties that could use the company of An Eager to Cunnilingus Cannibal?
Cannibal Steven avatarCannibal Steven
We don't do Friday Night Fights anymore right? Any DTOIDers have Battlefront or WiiU parties that could use the company of An Eager to Cunnilingus Cannibal?
Cannibal Steven avatarCannibal Steven
We don't do Friday Night Fights anymore right? Any DTOIDers have Battlefront or WiiU parties that could use the company of An Eager to Cunnilingus Cannibal?
Luckrequired avatarLuckrequired
10 years of this. Yeeeah baby!
Vamessi17 avatarVamessi17
Xbox One proves that they're useless.They said that they are better than Sony's PS4 since they've got more and better exclusives and that doesn't mean that they should offer most of the exclusives to PC.Now there's no need to own an Xbox.
Nekrosys avatarNekrosys
Well, I just ordered in an Undertale shirt. Despite my being crap at the game, it's just so charming. So. Ridiculously. Charming. I can't get mad at it, despite my awfulness at the bullet hell aspects.
Ckarasu avatarCkarasu
So, SMT IV: Final looks like it'll make fans of the older games happy. Especially fans of SMT 2.
Flegma avatarFlegma
Do games go in cycles like style? I mean, I think I can just as well play my 1993 Space Hulk (PC CD) instead of getting the moderately new Space Hulk instead.
Occams avatarOccams
Naruto 4 installs on my PS4 and it updates. Game says it can't run story mode during installation. Nothing's installing though. Restarted PS4. Reinstalled. Nothing. Fucking dumb.
StriderHoang avatarStriderHoang
This plays in my head every time I tell myself to stay determined.
Gamemaniac3434 avatarGamemaniac3434
Tonight, I learned what Flanx and MrNovember sound like in discord, listened to the best idea for a movie ever, and learned a little more about the depths of human depravity. A night well spent. Fuck us all.
Ckarasu avatarCkarasu
So, the artist that they used for Street Fighter 5's story mode(the arcade one) is kinda...not good. Go look up Laura's CGs. Colors are pale, and proportions sometimes end up kinda bonkers. Like, "extreme hourglass figure" level of bonkers.
FlanxLycanth avatarFlanxLycanth
Justin Timberlake blasts Kuma in the ass and dies.
ooktar avatarooktar
I'm loving these fighting game elitists trying to give me shit because I criticized Street Fighters Fight Money business model.
Nathan D avatarNathan D
Thanks to Dtoid I now have this gif in my life, and I can't stop laughing. I seriously can't get over it.
Jiraya avatarJiraya
Finished SOMA today , was able to do a second run without enemies with the "Wuss" mod, found it actually more frightening has you get more time to think about what is really going instead of doing hide-and-seek with the AI (Alien Isolation I miss you)
Mike Wallace avatarMike Wallace
I stayed up late last Saturday writing a Dead Space 4 proposal outline. Solved every plot hole, had plenty of badass moments. This is the state I live in, people.
Torchman avatarTorchman
WHY DO THEY GET SOUNDS BUT PIKACHU AND CHARIZARD CAN'T. WTF
more quickposts


Contest!


Seriously

Invert site colors

  Dark Theme
  Light Theme


Destructoid means family.
Living the dream, since 2006

Pssst. konami code + enter

modernmethod logo



Back to Top


We follow moms on   Facebook  and   Twitter
  Light Theme      Dark Theme
Pssst. Konami Code + Enter!
You may remix stuff our site under creative commons w/@
- Destructoid means family. Living the dream, since 2006 -