Of course, that's just us, and there are plenty of people who will tell you our reviews aren't worth reading, even though they obsessively read and comment on every single one. What are our fellow critics around the world saying? Did they find Remember Me more palatable? And will anyone at IGN tell us the different between a 5.8 and a 5.9?
Eurogamer: The result is a game that a small number of people will rightly love and cherish, but overall it's an uneven experience - one that feels like it knows what it wants to be, but has resigned itself to existing in a world where it can't quite get away with it. [7/10]
Metro: Remember Me is leant some air of unpredictability simply because it’s not the seventh sequel in an overfamiliar franchise, but that novelty cannot overcome the legion of rough edges and half-formed ideas. The game’s name may seem ironic at first, but by the end it feels more like a plea for help that doesn’t deserve to be answered. [5/10]
Polygon: Remember Me suffers when it pushes its design beyond the capabilities of its mechanics, when its gameplay ambitions exceed its capacity to meet them. Most games would falter under the weight of those mechanical complications, and Remember Me eyes trouble the most pointedly when it falls prey to overused video game conventions. But Remember Me's fiction and world-building make it more than just another running, jumping and climbing oriented beat-em-up - they make it a future worth exploring. [8/10]
GameSpot: Remember Me is a good game loaded with intriguing ideas; here's hoping that its sequel, should we ever have one, rides these ideas to greatness. [7/10]
GamesRadar: Remember Me is an inconsistently enjoyable experience. Its world provides an interesting glimpse into a could-be future, and the Memory Remix puzzles and Pressen system help offset its extreme linearity and stiff combat. There are enough good ideas here to keep you playing from start to finish, but Remember Me's rougher edges mean it'll fade from your memory far sooner than you might like. [3.5/5]
CVG: So, while Remember Me remains fictionally fresh, with its finger on the pulse, its visionary ideas give way to a less inspiring reality: an ambitious world hamstrung by a lot of fighting and platforming. [7/10]
Edge: Schlocky and silly in places, but potent and reflective in others, Nilin’s tale has bags of heart to play off against its flamboyant bosses and existential quandaries, all grounded by a charismatic female star. While the world building isn’t on a par with the best – hampered by a civilian population as robotic as its metal cohorts – a rich backstory and architectural detail make Neo-Paris a place worth visiting. It is, in other words, exactly the kind of tale you’d happily watch play out on any screen – silver or plasma. [8/10]
Videogamer: Remember Me is nothing more than an entirely forgettable tour de farce of archaic game design. Its horrific dialogue, sickening camera and regressive combat are major blips in a title that poses one major question: was this game worth releasing? ‘Dontnod’ is arguably the right answer. [4/10]
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