What about naughty ways to play retro games?

The Joydick!
http://projects.sfmedialabs.com/?p=3

I remember there being a ton of them for SNES, but for obvious reasons, they were mostly in Japan.

Of the most infamous, there's Custer's Revenge on the Atari 2600. For the NES, I remember hearing about, and then downloading Bubble Bath Babes. First off, the name is absolutely hilarious. Secondly, 8 bit boobies are also hilarious.



Is it bad that I know this?

As a kid, 7 numbers was all we needed:
8008135, baby!

--correction: make that 5318008, then turn it upside-down. ;-)

What do you find it easier to get off to: sprites or polygons?

I'm a polygon man myself, but some of that Super Metroid artwork you get for doing a speedrun is hot!

Golgo 13 must be mentioned at some point during this podcast, pwease. Someone should read out the 4th box down from the right, it's pretty hilarious.

What's the dirtiest (and more importantly funniest) joke or moment you can remember from a regular non "naughty" retro game that looking back now you can't believe they got away with.

Also I feel like this is relevant again ;3

Woops, sorry about that. I guess you could just right click > view image in order to see the full pic.

* X-Man from Atari 2600 had iconics graphics. And breaking controllers like Decathlon.

you can make micheal jackson grab his crotch in moonwalker that's all I really got

Please please please give a shout out to Arche from Tales of Phantasia! The scene where she's drunk and dreams about she and Cless is priceless! (at least in the DeJap translation)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGQl4MXdeHI

Aside from Ring King, I don't remember any explicit naughtiness in games I played (though I always heard about Custer's Revenge), but between my brothers and friends, we found ways to make various games appear naughty. My favorite would be Top Man from Mega Man 3. He firmly grabs his crotch when he appears, he has that dirty little smirk on the select screen, and his move is to spin his body and hurl himself at Mega Man. Clearly, his name is indicative of position. It also explains Mega Man's perfectly round O face when he jumps.

Did anyone else infer naughtiness out of their wholesome games?

WELL, I GUESS I'LL HAVE TO DO IT:

When was the first Time you had an erection or got turned on by a videogame character?

Also, since in retro games there's an obvious difference between boxart and in game graphics, have you ever used a boxart or character art from a magazine to do...well...naughty things?

You should all play Custer's Revenge during the podcast and race to "win".

Question:
Is the doctor is raping you in ET for Atari?

CHO ANIKI

What exactly would count as retro eroge? Specifically the earliest games for me personally were things like 'Season of Sakura' 'Runaway City', 'True Love' or even 'Paradise Heights. Would those count as retro naughties? or are there some I don't know about?

Dead or Alive xtreme 2. Also Why dose Japan have more Sex game than US?

If you could star a retro game charter in a porno who would your cast?

Alright, so, with the advent of Dragon Quest 8, we have a pretty good idea what a "puff puff" session involves. However, I'm wondering what you guys first thought when you encountered these scenes earlier in the series when there wasn't a graphic representation available.

Custers Revenge is a must mention but not for too long since some people might still be in pain.....-Sigh-
What about that one arcade game Gotcha or somethin like that..Anyways it had an odd "controller" which simulated feeling women
Honorable mentions Ms.Pac-Man, Pong, and I just have to mention Conker...limboish but who wouldnt like to urinate on enemies and smash some1s brass nuttZ

I played Sexacuda and Sex Games for the C64. Sexacuda was a pacman clone. The hero has a wiggling tongue and runs around eating dicks. Sex Games, is like decathlon for fat pixel fucking.

Mudkip from the origional pokemon games is pretty fucking sexy, amirite? (thats my question)

Lol I actually got engaged in True Loves story. Am I still a sane man?

One word
F-ing Assteroids..

This is probably more retro-limbo, but in its heyday Rare was good at sneaking naughty jokes into their kid/family-oriented games (especially the Banjo-Kazooie games). Remember Jolly Roger and his (gay) bar in Banjo-Tooie? To make this a question, can you think of any other seemingly innocent games that snuck in double entendres and the like for the older audience?

Why do you think sexual content in games is more scrutenized than violence? Like Topher said, god help us if there's a boob these days, but is it because gaming has been through everything possible with violence? Like lawsuits, blaming real life crimes with games, studies, etc. As most of us know, the biggest naughty scandal was GTA San Andreas' Hot Coffee.

Does more sexual content need to be showcased (tastefully or not) for it to be accepted like violence is today? Or are more people gonna forever flip their lids when they see some skin like the Mass Effect sex scene?

Being relatively young and having had very attentive parents, what naughty game do I need to play?

Also: Who was your first videogame lust, and do you still lust for them.

Has anything "naughty" in a videogame ever been done in your opinion a tasteful manner? Will that ever happen or will it be forever be seen as juvenile?

Tangela now thats naughty. Japanese tentacle monster.
For Kids!

Google it

One more questions for Chad, what is the gaming equivalent to Showgirls?

NateRiver beat me to the punch, but I also want to add how amusing it was that the DQ games have the waitresses from the casinos dressed like Playboy Bunnies. That's usually where you would get a puff-puff.

In Tales of Phantasia and in Final Fantasy IV you can have a porno magazine as a spellbook for the mage. What sort of other adult items could be of use in a videogame or just you would like to have?

Some people are idiots who need something to blame and eventually BELIEVE its the cause. But I dont its GTAs fault your 14 yo son has 3 coming children. Or your daughter murdered 80 men. Now thats just an out of control kid and downright insanity.
People just dont take responsibility anymore. Ever think of turning off the tv or monitor if you dont like it?
Keep in touch w/ your kids friends and their parents?
Its not just the kids that need growing up..

The only naughty retro games I've played are adventure games: Leisure Suit Larrt, Spellcasting 101 and Leather Goddesses of Phobos!

if you could fight any character from ANY retro game (not just fighters) who would it be? I would fight the spring boards on 75 m in Donkey Kong. i hate those assholes.

While alcohol isn't exactly a "naughty" subject by any means (it's pretty easy to slip into an E-rated game [see Harvest Moon]), it does lead to those situations. So was anyone else surprised when the arcade game "Tapper" had its beer changed to root beer when they brought it to XBLA?

Also, did any of you have super-conservative parents that flipped out when they saw Samus in a bikini at the end of Super Metroid? (Me, neither... then again, I never played Super Metroid until it hit the VC.)

Favorite Eroge game? Also, what would Kirby do to your cock for a nickel?

Have there been games whose erotic content was well supported by satisfying gameplay in your opinion? Bonus points if said games are more subtle than just simulating intercourse.

I loved Knights of Xentar when I was 13, but the gameplay and sex were totally in seperate arenas. Watching sex as a reward for puzzles doesn't count either.

I like Isay Isay's question, also.

-------------------

On a different side, what was a time you remember getting hot and bothered even though there was no direct sexual context in gameplay?

My most recent was getting all hot and bothered after setting up an incredible monster eating defense in gemcraft 0. I felt invincible, and all of the sudden, I was massively horny.

Most 8-bit erotica is hilarious but have any of you ever been turned on by a videogame?

has the retro gaming naughtiness ever given you a funny feeling in your pants?

I know it's kinda personal and all. I tried dating sims once and they got to me for some reason

Can you imagine how they would have done the Honey Bee Inn section of "Final Fantasy VII" had the game been out a few years earlier and probably been under heavier scrutiny for content?

Naughty Dog had a naughty logo you could unlock in Rings of Power way back when.

The ESRB came to be after parent groups and opportunist lawyers caught on to the few games that existed at the time that strarted depicting more realistic forms of violence. They further pushed the issue after tragedies such as Columbine happened and they could make tenuous links to video games.

So what if it was sexual content that had initially got the parent groups attention? Do you think the outrage would have been as big if not bigger than it was when the call for a ratings system first came out? Do you think they would attempt to link studies on teen sex and the spread of STDs to video games in much the same fashion that they do now with violence? Finally, do you think they would continue to ignore other, more accessible sources of the "desensitizing stimulus" that has content far worse than the games they crusade against (such as television or movies)?

I realize this question could be a show in and of itself, but I would really like to hear some of your thoughts on this hypothetical situation.

So what do you think of those "remade" retro games?
As in where people try to make old school games erotic, like Super Porno Brothers, MegaGay, or my favorite erotic remade retro game, Link Gets Laid, which is basically the porn version of Link's Awakening. It allows you to dick slap octoroks and bosses with your Master Dick.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yjgbs0pMEGk
*Warning that link(har har pun) may or may not ruin your thoughts on that classic game. NSFW?*

As a totally unrelated side note, how do you feel about Beast Busters being one of the favorite games of The King of Pop, Michael Jackson?

Do you all remember finding the Naga-ette Bromide in Chrono Trigger? The first time I played through and found it in the cathedral I didn't know what it was, but after I played Lunar and started finding those bromides I finally figured out that it was inappropriate snake-woman photos. Did you all have a similar experience or did you get right away what it was?

Also: I loved Lunar's bromides! I thought it was great to see the game's heroines and villainesses in various states of playful undress.

All the examples I can think of are meant dudes. Isn't there any erotic retro game goodness for the ladies?

I remember when I was a kid and I went to the arcades, there were lots of obscure japanese games that had naughty drawings, like gals panic, pipi and bibis and some pool/billiards game I can't remember, but had some pretty girls stripping.

Of course, I never played them, but I spent hours and hours watching other player because: 1- I was too bad to get the girls naked 2- I was too shy to play those games.

The downside to that was that some players just skipped the naughty scenes because they wanted to reach the end of the game faster, and I felt REALLY UPSET.

So, were you the guys that played those games at the arcade or the ones that, like me, spent hours watching other teens getting the goods?

A little River City Ransom naughtiness.

Why do R-rated movies have so much more freedom with the topic of sex/nudity than M-rated games do?

Leisure Suit Larry! The original games were hilarious, and it was a guilty pleasure for me for two reasons. First, it was dirty and I wasn't supposed to be playing them back when I was a preteen, and secondly I had not downloaded them from BBS sites.

Do you find today's titties more or less disgusting than retro titties? When graphics were primitive large chested women only had two or three more pixels in width than a fair sized dame. Meanwhile, today's grossly over sized mammary sandbags seem to be drawn or rendered like over inflated footballs bouncing around on the chest of a 13 year old girl.

... Well, I hope I made the answer obvious enough to you. >.<

Though it has degraded into a painful farce of its past self, it could be argued that for a long while Leisure Suit Larry was the pinnacle of naughty gaming.

Are the old Leisure Suite Larry games still engaging enough that they should be recommended to younger generations of players to go back and play? Is the humor found in classic Larry still relevant, risque, and most importantly, funny by today's standards? What is Al Lowe's legacy as a game designer/writer? And should they stop making new Larry games before they grind any fond memories that are left into an unrecognizable pulp?

Though it has degraded into a painful farce of its past self, it could be argued that for a long while Leisure Suit Larry was the pinnacle of naughty gaming.

Are the old Leisure Suite Larry games still engaging enough that they should be recommended to younger generations of players to go back and play? Is the humor found in classic Larry still relevant, risque, and most importantly, funny by today's standards? What is Al Lowe's legacy as a game designer/writer? And should they stop making new Larry games before they grind any fond memories that are left into an unrecognizable pulp?

Tha late eighties were the days: it was not so much due to a lack of censoring (some games even had disclaimers), but mainly because mainstream press (and most parents) didn't give a damn about what was running on our consoles/computers.

Those were the days of the strip-<insert_your_game_of_choice> series (mainly poker), and 4 or 6 colors was all we needed to make photorealistic graphics.

http://screenmania.retrogames.com/c64/02/c64_0045.html
That's Artworx's Strip Poker... waaay before the advent of the internet and Cinemax. It was the first time I saw a naked girl onscreen...

The retro-googles are an amazing thing.