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Pathetic punk prevented from pilfering PlayStations by prior pugilist

5:43 PM on 04.09.2008 // Samit Sarkar

If you’re a criminal, what’s the first rule of any job? Do your homework, right? Well, 16-year-old Iowan Jake Merfeld definitely knew that, but it seems that he didn’t follow through completely. The kid tried to steal a PS3, PSP, and numerous games from a house in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, so he obviously had scoped out the place well enough to know what was inside. Unfortunately for him, he ran into a heap of trouble during the actual burglary — in the form of Derdre Rodriguez.

Rodriguez is a former professional female boxer, but she’s been retired for a decade. However, she’s stayed in shape over the years, and all her training came in handy during the attempted robbery. Upon coming home for lunch, she caught Merfeld sneaking out her son’s bedroom window. Furious, she gave chase, picking up an ice chipper and calling the police along the way. The story was picked up by CNN, and there’s a video available on their Web site. Here’s my favorite line:

“Yeah, I was saying a lot to him, especially when he was running out of gas. I was telling him what I was gonna do to him once he—once I caught him.”

After whacking the kid in the noggin with the ice chipper (see header image), she dragged him back to her house while making him pick up the stuff he’d dropped along the way: a PS3, a PSP, some cell phones, and some games. Police quickly arrived, and they took Merfeld to the hospital to be treated for his head injury. Now, he’s in the Linn County Detention Center, and he’s facing a second-degree burglary charge.

Rodriguez says she now has an alarm system for her home, but it doesn’t appear that she really needs one, now does it? Former pro boxer + ice chipper = all the security you need.

[via KCRG-TV9, Cedar Rapids, Iowa by way of CNN — thanks, Jonathan!]

Samit Sarkar,
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