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Save Ryu from looking generic in Street Fighter IV: A fanboy's top 10 wishes

Editor's note: In an internal staff email us old-timers were just laughing about the absurdity of this super fanboy article I wrote back in 2007 voicing my disgust with the redesigned Street Fighter. I've since grown accustom...   more

Save Ryu from looking generic in Street Fighter IV: A fanboy's top 10 wishes photo

Where are they now? Ex-Destructoid editors in the biz

As some of you may have heard by now, Dale North (our editor in chief from 2010-2014) will be moving on to sunnier, though less 'toidy skies. You can read that announcement here. It's no secret that Dale and I have definitel...   more

Where are they now? Ex-Destructoid editors in the biz photo

Golden Archives: The Destructoid children's alphabet book

[Something cool we just remembered from our Golden Archives. Love this! -Niero] Last year, GuitarAtomik sang, Rio McCarthy made a bunch of awesome, Necros was racy, itemforty drew the staff, RockVillian made a prologue, Canni...   more

Golden Archives: The Destructoid children's alphabet book photo


Golden Archives: The Destructoid children's alphabet book photo
Golden Archives: The Destructoid children's alphabet book photo
Golden Archives: The Destructoid children's alphabet book photo
Golden Archives: The Destructoid children's alphabet book photo
Golden Archives: The Destructoid children's alphabet book photo
Golden Archives: The Destructoid children's alphabet book photo



Destructoid Golden Classics: The Mega Man Maker

By popular request, I've dug through old hard drives and present to you Destructoid's classic Mega Man maker!  This little app was originally published during PAX 2008 during a panel we gave about how important it is to ...   more

Destructoid Golden Classics: The Mega Man Maker photo

Citizens, unite: vote Mike Haggar

[Another gem from Destructoid's Golden Archives, this our most popular story of April 2008] As you’ve no doubt been following the prospective U.S. presidential nominees, you must be asking yourself several question...   more

Citizens, unite: vote Mike Haggar photo

Videogame characters that look like David Bowie

[This Saturday Dtoid turns 7! Here's our most popular story of the day back in 2009. Not coincidentally, Bowie's game was also just released on GoG. -Niero] David Bowie, born David Robert Jones on January 8, 1947, is an ...   more

Videogame characters that look like David Bowie photo

Ten golden rules of online gaming

[Destructoid turns 7 next week! Here's our most popular article from January 2009, one of Jim's first features. Check out more of our earlier works in our Golden Archives. -Niero] People have been hunched over their PCs, firi...   more

Ten golden rules of online gaming photo

The ten most meaningful videogame quotes of all time

[This month, Destructoid turns 7 years old! Here's the top article of this weekend back in 2008. You can browse more of these in our Golden Archives. Nostalgic yet? -Niero] Call me a weakling, but it's been more or less forev...   more

The ten most meaningful videogame quotes of all time photo

Six sinister things about Super Mario

[Destructoid turns 7 on March 16, 2013! I'm celebrating early by repairing some of my favorite articles from our Wordpress days. You'll be able to browse this original collection soon -- "Destructoid's Golden Archives" is her...   more

Six sinister things about Super Mario photo

Ramblings of a colorblind gamer

You may or may not know that I am red-green colorblind. Money looks grey to me, pink looks white, brown looks green. No big thing. Since I was born colorblind, I have no frame of reference for how the world is "supposed" to l...   more

Ramblings of a colorblind gamer photo

Videogames that make you feel godly

Videogames provide the perfect tools for pure escapism or utter powerlessness. As a fully interactive media, the player can be as involved as the developer in the fate of our characters, or we can be utterly impotent in swayi...   more

Videogames that make you feel godly photo

The REAL top ten games of the decade

You've doubtless read by now the "official" top ten games of the decade, or indeed any of the top ten game lists that have spilled onto the Internet as the so-called "naughties" ends and 2010 ushers in yet another arbitrarily...   more

The REAL top ten games of the decade photo

Rev Rant: Donate

Every week, "Reverend" Anthony Burch talks about aspects of game design and gamer culture in his weekly "Rev Rant" video series. Admittedly, this week's rant turned out a lot more angry and weirdly serious than the other one...   more

Rev Rant: Donate photo

How Killzone 2 is blatantly better than Halo 3

Killzone 2 launched exclusively for the PlayStation 3 this Friday, generating much bias from biased people who are biased. It also sold quite a few copies and has been setting the PlayStation Network afire with grenade spam a...   more

How Killzone 2 is blatantly better than Halo 3 photo

Playing With Others: Gaining acceptance

[Editor's note: neveranything shares with us a very heartwarming story on how videogames helped him make new friends for his Monthly Musing piece. -- CTZ] Throughout elementary and middle school, I was the textbook definitio...   more

Playing With Others: Gaining acceptance photo

The Videogame Bosses' Guide to Success

So you aspire to be a roadblock in the path of every hero, a hulking shadow that ominously hangs over the hopes and dreams of normal people, the guy that makes babies squall at your very approach. I know you. You've turned ma...   more

The Videogame Bosses' Guide to Success photo

A Time to Destroy: The games that destroy us

[Editor's note: Tony Ponce, which we only knew as "megaStryke" when this was published, looks at three games that have destroyed people's bodies for his A Time to Destroy Monthly Musing. In 2012 he joined the Dtoid team as an...   more

A Time to Destroy: The games that destroy us photo

Being a solo gamer in a multiplayer world

Being a gamer over 30 means that you likely fell in love with gaming a long time ago. For me, that affair started around age 6, as my uncle showed me the Atari and I prowled through his Commodore 64 collection, wondering what...   more

Being a solo gamer in a multiplayer world photo

Hail the freak: 36 WoW accounts, played simultaneously. By a freak

I submit evidence of one man, which I am going to use to paint all World of Warcraft players as subhuman scumworms who deserve to be shot. This creature owns 36 WoW accounts, plays them at the same time on 11 computers, and g...   more

Hail the freak: 36 WoW accounts, played simultaneously. By a freak photo

Thirty rubbish Pokemon: Red/Blue edition

As readers will know, I recently confessed my closet Pokémon fandom and am celebrating my newfound liberation with a selection of Pokémon-themed articles for those who also like to throw hard metal balls at fluf...   more

Thirty rubbish Pokemon: Red/Blue edition photo

Six ways in which Pokemon really bothers me

Believe it or not, I really like Pokémon. I've been a big fan of the series since I was a child, but even though my interest in the series diminished as I got older, I still find myself dipping back into the monster-ca...   more

Six ways in which Pokemon really bothers me photo

Ten Golden Rules of action games

There really is nothing quite like a good old-fashioned action game. From God of War to Bujingai, they are the bread and butter of a lifelong gamer's diet. A third-person mixture of combat and exploration, it is a genre absol...   more

Ten Golden Rules of action games photo

Ten Golden Rules of the anti-videogames lobby

We have had many useful commandments for loyal readers over the course of our Ten Golden Rules series. From learning how to be an online gamer and fanboy, to crafting a successful JRPG or Survival Horror, there have been fail...   more

Ten Golden Rules of the anti-videogames lobby photo

Ten golden rules of videogame fanboyism

What industry can truly call itself an industry without fanboys? Those who prove themselves obsessively loyal to any product or corporation can be found among many communities, and nowhere do they flourish more freely than wi...   more

Ten golden rules of videogame fanboyism photo

There's no such thing as a perfect game: why 10/10 shouldn't mean "flawless"

So, I'm reading Topher's Ikaruga review and the comments resulting from it. Other than the usual half-ironic cries of "biased!" and "Anthony would have given this a 4!", I saw many repetitions of one particular sentiment tha...   more


Ten golden rules of survival horror

By our very nature, we as people are drawn to the dark. We may not like to admit it, but our macabre instincts thirst for blood, as we find ourselves morbidly drawn to brutality and violence. It is no surprise that horror is ...   more

Ten golden rules of survival horror photo

Ten golden rules of Japanese RPGs

The JRPG is a venerable and well respected genre, having survived almost unchanged for decades and supported by a community of hardcore obsessives that drool over every statistic and sweeping, globe trotting storyline that co...   more

Ten golden rules of Japanese RPGs photo

Shadow of the Colossus' controls are an exercise in art

Artsy wonks like myself love to wax philosophic about the potential that games have in terms of narration or eliciting meaningful, emotional player responses. We laud innovative game designers for forcing us to make morally a...   more

Shadow of the Colossus' controls are an exercise in art photo

Five videogame characters who suck at their jobs

In general, our videogame protagonists need a set context for their lives before being thrust into action and adventure. Mario can't just be a dude with a goomba-stomping fetish; he has to be a plumber. Marcus Fenix can't jus...   more

Five videogame characters who suck at their jobs photo

From Russia with pixels; the coolest picture you'll see today

[Updated with the 2005 and 2010 version! Remember Nex? This odd illustration still ranks amongst the most popular in the Destructoid Golden Archive; stories which I'm slowly restoring from our old publishing sy...   more

From Russia with pixels; the coolest picture you'll see today photo

The Endgame Syndrome: Why do we abandon games?

As most of my Destructoid compatriots know, I await RPGs with intriguing storylines more than any other type of game. I enjoy nothing more than to sink myself into a rich plot, get to know the characters, and most of all, exp...   more

The Endgame Syndrome: Why do we abandon games? photo

THE GAME IS MASTURBATING! Watch Super Mario World Play Itself

Modding a game to make it glitch out and do freaky shit is one thing. Modding a game and turning it into an amazing work of art is quite another. Take, for instance, these clips of various user created worlds in Super Mar...   more

THE GAME IS MASTURBATING! Watch Super Mario World Play Itself photo

The end, my friend part 2: videogame endings that don't suck

A few weeks ago I tackled the issue of why videogame endings are so hard to execute effectively. So as not to be a Negative Nancy incapable of pointing out excellence in videogaming narratives, the following is a list, howeve...   more

The end, my friend part 2: videogame endings that don't suck photo

Life in a video game: the pros and cons

What if tomorrow morning you woke up and your life was exactly like your favorite video game? What would you look forward to doing first? Would you drive down the I-90 in your Pontiac Sunfire at 100mph with no regard for traf...   more

Life in a video game: the pros and cons photo

Gaming under the influence: Top 10 drunk multiplayer games

Drinking while gaming is such a stupid thing to do, and yet I know most people this site will have tried it. It's a match made in heaven when it comes to entertaining. But playing games drunk on your own is depressing and sad...   more

Gaming under the influence: Top 10 drunk multiplayer games photo

The thing about girl gamers

Editor's Note: Hey all, DMV here. Atheistium's written an interesting rant on the whole girl gamer issue, which has always been a hot topic. So far, it's been a real hit on the community blogs, so give this Destructoid veteran some love and read her story. Enjoy! I finally want to get my issues with the "girl gamer" culture to rest. This will be my final rant on it all... finally.   more

The thing about girl gamers photo

Game endorsements we never want to see

"Merchandising, merchandising, where the real money from the movie is made. Spaceballs: The T-shirt, Spaceballs: The Coloring Book, Spaceballs: The Lunch Box, Spaceballs: the Breakfast Cereal, Spaceballs: the Flame Thrower.&r...   more

Game endorsements we never want to see photo

Squeeze her boobies to go pew!

  File this under the "why in the hell did I not think of this?!" category. Intimate Control was created by Jennifer Chowdhury for her class thesis project. The aim of the game is to help bring couples together for a...   more

Squeeze her boobies to go pew! photo


Squeeze her boobies to go pew! photo
Squeeze her boobies to go pew! photo
Squeeze her boobies to go pew! photo
Squeeze her boobies to go pew! photo
Squeeze her boobies to go pew! photo
Squeeze her boobies to go pew! photo



Pipe cleaners are the new sexy

I'm going to preface this by saying that I've never actually cleaned a pipe with pipe cleaners. As a small child Last week, however, I did manage to spell my name with them, with each letter corresponding to one pipe cleaner....   more

Pipe cleaners are the new sexy photo

The guilty pleasures of gaming

The word hardcore when applied to gamers tends to paint a picture of a person who plays games like Halo, Grand Theft Auto, and Gears of War, not someone who sits with his little Nintendo DS and plays hours of Cooking Mama or ...   more

The guilty pleasures of gaming photo


The guilty pleasures of gaming photo
The guilty pleasures of gaming photo
The guilty pleasures of gaming photo
The guilty pleasures of gaming photo
The guilty pleasures of gaming photo
The guilty pleasures of gaming photo



Experience the hardest Mario ever (no fluffing required!)

If you are ever in a situation where your little sister complains about a Mario game being too hard, please just slap her and show her this video. Created by a random somebody in Taiwan (my vote is for escaped mental patient...   more

Experience the hardest Mario ever (no fluffing required!) photo

Super Mario Bros. theme has lyrics

More Nintendo trivia for you. Did you know the Super Mario Bros. theme has lyrics? Of course, the theme is apparently called "Go Go Mario" and is originally in Japanese but lucky for us the poster of the video above was kind...   more

Super Mario Bros. theme has lyrics photo

Real men play Gradius

[This month Destructoid celebrates 7 friggin' years of whatever it is we do! Here's the most popular article of this weekend, back in 2007, and easily one of my favorite story headlines of all time. Check our Golden Archi...   more

Real men play Gradius photo

PlayStation 3 for $10!

Omigod guys, you'll never believe what happened. I found a PS3 for ten bucks -- that's right, a PlayStation 3, normally sold for upwards of $500, procured for a single slim Hamilton. It's weird, though. The discs won't fit an...   more

PlayStation 3 for $10! photo

Developer tales: The true story of an abused game tester

[Editor's note: What you are about to read is a true story of an industry veteran and loyal Destructoid reader who has been in the business for some time. Names have been left out to protect the identity of those involved, bu...   more

Developer tales: The true story of an abused game tester photo

Jerks of the gaming universe, 2007 edition

As I was playing Hotel Dusk the other day, I was thinking that Kyle Hyde is a bit of a dick. Not bad enough to actually annoy you, but enough for you to notice he could probably use an enema. It set off a conversation between...   more

Jerks of the gaming universe, 2007 edition photo

Why the Super Mario movie is an underappreciated masterpiece

No, I'm not being ironic, or corny, or funny. Neither am I drunk, stoned, nor under the influence of outside forces requiring me to like the Super Mario Bros movie anymore than I already do. I simply wish to inform you, the r...   more

Why the Super Mario movie is an underappreciated masterpiece photo

The two greatest game endings ever produced

Game endings are generally an occasion for players to reflect on both the good and bad times they endured throughout their gaming experience. Other times, endings can make you wonder how the hell you were tricked into buying...   more

The two greatest game endings ever produced photo

Sexy Beach 3: Men are simple edition

Oh, you crazy Japanese developers.  Here's a clip sure to piss off half of the internet and make the other half run for lotion and a tissue. The object of Sexy Beach 3 is apparently to interrupt a bikini woman'...   more



Sexy Beach 3: Men are simple edition photo
Sexy Beach 3: Men are simple edition photo
Sexy Beach 3: Men are simple edition photo
Sexy Beach 3: Men are simple edition photo
Sexy Beach 3: Men are simple edition photo
Sexy Beach 3: Men are simple edition photo



Jack Black, age 12: schizophrenic jungle explorer

The above video surfaced recently of a young Jack Black promoting Pitfall in a television commercial. In the subsequent years, he would eat four people and a small bus, and balloon into one of America's premier comic darlings. F*** Her Gently indeed!    more

Jack Black, age 12: schizophrenic jungle explorer photo