Quantcast



Long before GameStop swallowed up most of its major competitors, there was FuncoLand. The first major videogame chain store of its kind, FuncoLand offered plenty of used games for all consoles. Unbeknownst to us all until now, FuncoLand employees were horribly mistreated as they were forced to watch this disgusting employee training video.

As brain hurting as this video is, I can't help but remember when I first started working in videogame retail. It was during the N64 and PlayStation 1 era and seeing all of those classic games on the shelves brings back some memories. Mostly bad memories, but some good ones too.

Check out the second part of the employee training video after the break.

Random Time! - FuncoLand training video [GoNintendo]

What is up with the face paint?!








More gaming stories around the web. Got news? Submit yours to tips@destructoid.com

Hamza Aziz, Destructoid's Community Director, has been here since day one. He was born when a tiger coughed up a hairball into a pool of ooze. He was one of the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles before budget cuts. Hamza works as a previews editor and manages a team in San Francisco. To date he has given away tens of thousands of dollars in prizes to readers. What a dick. Actually, Hamza is as kind as he is hairy. Likes Super Mario RPG, Halo, iPhone, Videogame cover bands, Super Nintendo Meet the rest of the team



Post a comment! You can also post a photo below:

Comment with Facebook





Click connect and comment instantly!

Comment with Dtoid





New? SIGN UP - it takes 5 seconds

52 comments | showing # 1 to 50
prev
next 50 comments

BloodyRights's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:05
BloodyRights
Funcoland employees were apparantly shown the neogeo battle coliseum xbox 360 gameplay.
killedthekat's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:12
killedthekat
There's a Funcoland in a mall that I rarely visit.
But there's also a Gamestop in the same mall, not too far away.
GuitarAtomik's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:13
GuitarAtomik
I still don't understand why corporations think a customer wants to hear every single thing a company offers (down to the fact that they clean systems) every time they walk in a store. That shit is annoying. Just acknowledge me when I walk in, when I have a question, and when I want to be rung up. That goes for EVERY retail store.
Vigor's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:18
Vigor
Brain is bleeding.
Shin Oni's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:20
Shin Oni
@Killedthekat

sounds like the mall near me. 1 side has the funcoland still and then the other side...Gamestop.....then less than 5 mins away is a Gamestop in the strip mall.

I miss the real fucnoland for sure...but dammit was that hard to watch with a straight face. I hate ANY type of training vids. always outdated.
bakasama's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:20
bakasama
The retro game store in Acworth, GA closed recently. A moment of silence please.
Occams electric toothbrush's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:21
Occams electric toothbrush
Bizzaro Chuck Simmons looks like a bloated, low-rent version of Alice Cooper.

Game cleaning solution < blowing in the system. Just ask my Nintendo.

Employees who try to up-sell me crap I don't need annoys me.

If I could go back in time to that store I would rack up on playstation games and possibly dick punch Adam.

As someone who collects employee training videos (yeah, I know I'm weird) I have to say this made my fucking day.
Strollymonster's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:21
Strollymonster
@GuitarAtomik

Sadly, managers are entirely too quick to force every employee to upsell at every opportunity. The unfortunate truth is that it actually does work for most of the population. My time working at a movie theater demonstrated that.

I agree it's annoying...they should create some kind of button or indicator that people can wear that tells retail employees not to try selling more crap to them.
IzekialRage's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:24
IzekialRage
I still have that cleaning device. Apparently my mother was convinced into buying one. Great job funcoland employee!
Jumbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:24
Jumbo
GamemasterBro's makeup is a little too blackface-y for my tastes. Funcoland was racist!
froman46992's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:25
froman46992
evil bastards
Hakael's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:27
Hakael
I worked at Funcoland just as GameStop came in and ruined it. Great high school job...
froman46992's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:32
froman46992
this guy is evil not only does he rape a yellow orb he also rapes a game, and n64 and that guys wallet.
Guncannon's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:36
Guncannon
"Cruisin' USA is a great game."

.....

"Cleaning systems will make it last longer." then jamming a plastic gimmick into the cartridge slot.

.....

Also, what business doesn't try and "go the extra mile" for customers?
Sanious's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:39
Sanious
Was this actually an episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark?
Genius's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:39
Genius
Oh man I remember Funcoland. Its the first and last place I ever traded a game, Zelda: Link to the Past for FFVI. Wish I didn't get rid of that game, oh well.

I still remember the the most expensive game on the resale chart was Ogre Battle SNES lol.
Woogity's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:41
Woogity
"Clean your games just about every time you play them." Seriously? N64 games? Those never quit working.
Senger's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:44
Senger
This is a hell of a lot better than the videos I have had to watch at other jobs.
RenegadePanda's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:55
RenegadePanda
FuncoLand cleaned systems? I was never once pitched that at either of the FuncoLand locations around here. Nor was I approached by a sweaty nervous teenager asking 'what brings you here?'

What do you think brings me here? I'd like a car and a Philly cheesesteak sandwich while you prepare my taxes. That's why I'm here.
Generic Dude's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 17:58
Generic Dude
How did that asshole get away with playing The Castlevania Adventure at work? It sounds like he sucks at it.
Airbr1dge's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 18:05
Airbr1dge
I wish gamestores where not dominated by gamestop .
TheBigFeel's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 18:09
TheBigFeel
Oh yeah.... clean that game, baby
BillsterJ's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 18:12
BillsterJ
If part of their culture is "Honesty," then why are they telling me to clean games EVERY time I use them?
jettpack's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 18:12
jettpack
THAT WAS AWEFUL. i mean jesus fucking christ.
Rosseh's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 18:17
Rosseh
Much better than some of the ones I've seen. I hate this kind of crap though, pushing extras on customers. Usually you can tell who's who. Clueless people need advice, they don't need pointless cleaning kits. Customer Service really means fleecing, though, doesn't it?
Shoop's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 18:25
Shoop
I miss Funcoland a lot. They were the only store I could get video game OSTs for a penny ;_;
Jeff Cusack's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 18:38
Jeff Cusack
So they basically trained their employees to become the stereotypical dicks that every shopper hates, the type of people who lie to sell you things that you in know way need, like game cleaners.

If such evil was defeated by Gamestop, the minds behind that store must be truly terrifying.
Monodi's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 19:05
Monodi
I never knew there was such a thing as a cleaning cartridge. I should get one.

Also, I thought that was a fun corny video rather than awful.
Wedge's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 19:12
Wedge
Funcoland was actually a pretty great store, none of the employees at the one I went to ever bugged you at all. The pricing sheets they had were a great reference too. Then it turned into a Gamestop and got worse and worse over the years as the old management and employees were phased out.
Qraze's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 19:15
Qraze
that was the greatest training video ever! and that's only because it didn't open with "stealing hurts you the most but effects everyone".
protoknuckles's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 19:18
protoknuckles
Someone decided this was better than the traditional training video. Multiple people agreed, and multiple people worked on it, eventually coming up with that. It's things like this that I just can't comprehend.
Hakael's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 20:15
Hakael
Nobody acted like this at Funcoland when I was there. The video must have been well before my time, because we didn't have the polo shirts they're wearing (there was a casual dress code). Employees would put games in the display systems that they liked and wanted to endorse. Hell, on most days if you opened you'd sit playing a game until a customer came in, and that could be hours at the location I was at... It was great fun.
rsquad's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 20:24
rsquad
While I have nothing but fond memories of good 'ol Funcoland (and shudder to think at the now classic games I carelessly traded in to them - like PS1 Persona 2:Eternal Punishment), the questions still remain:

What the hell is a Funco?

Where in the fuck did that name come from?

Always wondered that while driving by that place...
TheDRMaster's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 20:55
TheDRMaster
The Master of Games is a dick.
Ninjabunny's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 21:25
Ninjabunny
OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS STORE. I remember going wayyy back in the day and ANY game I wanted I could try before I bought it. It was fantastic. As a kid you see all this shovelware stuff but to you its like o hey i like stuff like that so you pick it up to buy it. Then a guy puts it in the system and ur like rofl screw this.

Also, I told the guy once I liked RPGs and he pointed out a nice little gem (un)known as suikoden.

Now I'm so engrossed in video game news online I don't really need a second thought to figure out what games I what but back in the SNES days this place was a miracle.
Killrig's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 22:19
Killrig
That was pretty epic. I never had to view anything like this.

During college, I worked at EB before it was swallowed up by GameStop. I worked there for 2 years, eventually becoming the store manager. I got some good experience there and met a lot of great folks from the local developers. Working there was my doorway into the games industry, so I don't regret it at all. Still, retail was rough and it only seems to get worse. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Ninja Cameraman's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 22:29
Ninja Cameraman
Why is that guy convinced his ''Evil Laugh'' is needed every other line?
Ninja Cameraman's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 22:47
Ninja Cameraman
Game Informer? Good customer decison? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE WORLD?? lol
Judo Porkchop's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 23:01
Judo Porkchop
I remember being a salesman in retail, this is EXACTLY what it's like. That fatass that kept prodding the kid to do more and sell more is exactly what bosses do. They seem to also completely fucking contradict themselves. If I sold a lot for a month but had little sales in the extended warranty, some maintenence agreement thing, the friggin credit card...they would blow a lid. If nobody was shopping and I sold little, but had got tons of poor fools to signup for the card, warranty, and other stupid shit, they would focus on the fact that I haven't been selling enough actual product. Fuck retail, I'll never go back to it.
Excel-2011's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 23:02
Excel-2011
I've heard only horror stories regarding FuncoLand. Now we know why.
jean2317's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 23:02
jean2317
I remember seeing that vid sitting in our back room! Our store switched from a Funcoland a couple years before I got there and I was just happy we didn't have a training vid. Shit, if the Funcoland one is this evil-for a store that was awsome, imagine the one Gamestop would make.....*shiver*
Judo Porkchop's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/25/2010 23:11
Judo Porkchop
BTW does the dad's son in the video have cancer? For some reason he reminded me of Gary Busey.

That made no sense.
Motorhead36's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/26/2010 00:54
Motorhead36
@Guitar Atomic

Speaking as the manager of a retail store, there are two points to this type of video.

1. If the person is a half brained sheep, sell them as much as possible.

2. If they're not, treat them accordingly, help them as much as you can without annoying them, and they'll come back to your store.

It's up to them to decide which category you fall in.


@ LoopholeJumper

Thank you for profiling me based on the methods I use to pay my bills, I bet you're one of the first to cry "unfair" when gamers are put under the eye for a "games cause violence" crusade.
Artemus's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/26/2010 02:14
Artemus
That would have been awesome in 3D!
Wintersocks's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/26/2010 04:44
Wintersocks
Adam looks like a combination of Storm Dain and Micheal Jackson.
Vimto's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/26/2010 05:02
Vimto
Adam can read minds, "get a second controller to play with you son", how the hell did he know that?
lewness's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/26/2010 07:01
lewness
System maintenance? Buy our video game cleaner!
Cleaner solution spill? Buy our video game cleaner wiper cloth!
Wiper cloth thrown around? Buy our video game cleaner wiper cloth cabinet!
Not enough space in your room? Buy our video game cleaner wiper cloth cabinet warehouse!

Warehouse cost too much money making you sad and depressing causing you to look for temporary avenues of entertainment to alleviate your problems? Buy a video game!
Kaspar's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/26/2010 08:57
Kaspar
Dude looked like he had been caught masturbating or something in the starting bit.
smoger's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/26/2010 09:07
smoger
it's hilarious to me that the NES spawned the "game cleaner" industry. NES games stopped working 90% of the time because of the cheap cartridge connectors, not the fact that the system or games were dirty. of course.. few of us knew that before the internet was around.
prev next 50 comments

Comment with Facebook





Click connect and comment instantly!

Comment with Dtoid





New? SIGN UP - it takes 5 seconds

Comments policy

Destructoid is an open discussion community. You don't need to "audition" to post a comment - just speak your mind. We respect differing opinions on the site, so have at it. Be smart, funny, insightful, clueless, or cute -- but back it up with substance. Keep your cool, keep it fun. We only ask that you act respectfully and above all: don't be a troll and ruin it for everyone else. Don't bring down gamers or we'll, you know, gently shoot you in the face and stuff you into a flaming mailbox. Each comment is your opportuntity to make this community awesomer. Is that even a word?

Avoiding the banhammer only requires common sense: spamming, trolling, racism, NSFW stuff, and other forms of sucking will not be tolerated. If anyone is griefing please report abuse. Be good. Don't suck!