Got news?   tips@destructoid.com  |  Never miss a story:   RSS + Twitter + YouTube
Hey! New here? Destructoid is a gaming discussion community, updated nearly every 20 minutes. Make a quick avatar to comment and enter our contests. Take the tour!

 


Home Racing Games updates

Oh wait, my bad! Mario Kart doesn't even have text support!

12:23 AM on 02.28.2008, Hamza CTZ Aziz 148 comments

Oh wait, my bad! Mario Kart doesn't even have text support! photo
     Racing Games

Alright, so remember how I said that Mario Kart for the Wii will support text chatting? Well I was completely wrong. Or rather, Nintendo has no idea what the hell texting means. Here's the deal, Mario Kart will only support pre-determined phrases that people can send to each other, which Nintendo will provide. So phrases like "Hello", "Lets race!" and "Lets have fun!" are some of the things that are safe to assume will be available. 

Thank God you're here to protect us Nintendo! I was really worried you were slipping. Thank you so much for babysitting the fan base and keeping them safe from the pedophiles and creeps of the Internet. If you're mad about this, than you're obviously one of the evil people. No doubt that you want to send children messages like "Your tears turn me on." and "I have a lollipop in my pants for you." You people make me sick. 

[Via Kotaku


Next page: More Mario stories




Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 02/28/2008 00:23
Nintendo does not know how to run an online service.
Coonskin05's Avatar
Coonskin05 at 02/28/2008 00:27
"If you're mad about this, than you're obviously one of the evil people. No doubt that you want to send children messages like "Your tears turn me on." and "I have a lollipop in my pants for you." You people make me sick."

I love you so much CTZ.
Shalashaska's Avatar
Shalashaska at 02/28/2008 00:28
Thanks Nintendo! I was really worried I would have to endure people making horrible text smileys like this one

=0 (=============

after every races. If a young child ever saw such a thing, they would obviously be scarred for life and grow up to be insane psychopaths, similar to Jack Thompson.
ZekeThePlumber's Avatar
ZekeThePlumber at 02/28/2008 00:32
Phew, my special place is safe!

THANKS NINTENDO!
Ub3rSlug's Avatar
Ub3rSlug at 02/28/2008 00:33
Confirmed for text chat:

"I'm gonna put a baby in you."
Necros's Avatar
Necros at 02/28/2008 00:35
Goddammit Nintendo.
Unicorn's Avatar
Unicorn at 02/28/2008 00:35
the game isn't looking that good anyway. just mario kart double dash, but cleaning out the lame double dash shit.

so basically, mario kart ds with GC graphics and lame bikes.


i have little excitement for this.
Dr Milkdad's Avatar
Dr Milkdad at 02/28/2008 00:36
Nintendo sucks at the internet.

I'd prefer to be ass raped by the internet then deal with Nintendo's bullshit.
tazarthayoot's Avatar
tazarthayoot at 02/28/2008 00:37
Approved chat messages:

"Hi!"

"I win!"

"I'm sad!"

"I'm wearing Spiderman underpants, thanks for asking!"

"I am eleven years old and my parents are at work Monday through Friday until seven pm. My grandmother watches me during the day but she's catatonic from the loss of grandpa to "the gays" as she put it, so someone would have easy access to getting into my house and raping the shit out of me."

"Good Game!"
Shin Oni's Avatar
Shin Oni at 02/28/2008 00:39
so...I can't find those crazy little 15 year old kids acting like grown 30 year olds?

THANKS NINTENDO! You guys sure help me get through my gaming experience so much better![/sarcasm]

what's next? Playing the computer online? Oh wait, Brawl has that. ^_^ Nintendo Wins.
Y0j1mb0's Avatar
Y0j1mb0 at 02/28/2008 00:41
"Hello, Nintendo. Your lame."
3r0t1c n3rd's Avatar
3r0t1c n3rd at 02/28/2008 00:43
Thanks phedophiles! You broke the internet, now nobody gets to talk.
ian_esq's Avatar
ian_esq at 02/28/2008 00:43
Give us a choice god dammit!
DaedHead8's Avatar
DaedHead8 at 02/28/2008 00:47
wwwwwwwwwwwwwwtttttttttttttttttfffffffffffffffffff
JonDarkwood's Avatar
JonDarkwood at 02/28/2008 00:54
Is Nintendo's abortion of an online strategy starting to rank up there with Jack on the list of things people just don't care about anymore?

It certainly is for me.
B-Radicate's Avatar
B-Radicate at 02/28/2008 00:54
Smash Bros. will likely be the last Nintendo game I ever purchase. So this has no real effect on me, but as someone who used to support Nintendo wholeheartedly, it's shit like this that makes me sick to the point where I have abandoned not only hope, but the company as a whole.
freeman1's Avatar
freeman1 at 02/28/2008 00:58
There are no Smash Bros. or Mario Kart equivalents on 360 or PS3. So if you're a fan of either one of those games, you have no choice but to buy them on Wii no matter how bad the online is. Nintendo knows that anyone who was ever going to buy theses games will buy them no matter what. So all they have to do is add some half assed online service to their games to give people who already have Gamecubes a reason to buy a Wii, and they spend the rest of their time marketing to the soccer moms and old people who think they're getting in shape playing Wii bowling for 10 minutes every day before Dr. Phil comes on.

Microsoft(and Sony to a lesser extent) has to have great online in order to sell their consoles/games, but Nintendo doesn't. Nintendo will have a good online service when demand forces them to, and not any sooner.
Lord The Night Knight's Avatar
Lord The Night Knight at 02/28/2008 01:06
Amazing how a feature unrelated to actual gameplay is more important than, well, GAMEPLAY.

Come on. If they said they were removing half the weapons, I would actually be complaining.
Neonie's Avatar
Neonie at 02/28/2008 01:13
@Lord the Night Knight

The reason I'm not going to pick it up is not becuase of chat. I'm never buying another Mario Kart game again till they remove Snakeing.
TheHunter234's Avatar
TheHunter234 at 02/28/2008 01:14
I used to be optimistic about Nintendo getting into online and was always hopeful they would actually get it right at some point. Now I just don't give a shit.
Gen Eric Gui's Avatar
Gen Eric Gui at 02/28/2008 01:20
Come on people.

It's MARIO KART.

Do you really need to fucking talk to the other person playing the game that badly? Really? Are you fucking setting up squad-based kart tactics now or something? No? Then you don't need fucking voice chat.

IT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER. It's Mario Kart. As long as I can race around a Mario-themed track in a vaguely kart-shaped object and fire turtle shells and banana peels at other players and power slide around corners, that's all that's really required. The very fact that I can now do this online has me head over heels excited for this game.

Stop making such a big fuss about such totally unnecessary bullshit and care more about the game itself plz k thnx.
Samit Sarkar's Avatar
Samit Sarkar at 02/28/2008 01:22
This is an abomination. An abomination, I tell you!

THIS AGGRESSION WILL NOT STAND!
BluDesign's Avatar
BluDesign at 02/28/2008 01:23
Rejected text phrases:

"I got a RROD"
"I'll kill you if you use a "p" in owned."
"I believe in a free democracy that isn't bound by lobbyists."
"Oh dip!"
"Make sure to add me to your MySpace"
"Magnum sized please"
"Slick young boys"
"w00t"
"Sex"
"Breast cancer"
"Wii"
"Poopy head face"
"Meanie-bo-beanie"
"Gene Shalit"
"T9 Text chat"
Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 02/28/2008 01:26
Fun to see people saying voice chat doesn't matter. Nothing like having to use to Skype to talk to a friend of yours when you're playing together.
Boolean's Avatar
Boolean at 02/28/2008 01:27
I FUCKING CALLED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Do you really need to fucking talk to the other person playing the game that badly? Really?"

In game? No, not really. In the lobby while trying to set up a match or after the race? Hell. Bloody. Yes.
rar rar's Avatar
rar rar at 02/28/2008 01:35
Thank the gods! this is great

And no I am not being sarcastic.

I love this decision, I do not want to hear all the bullshit that comes from the mouths or keyboards of oxygen thieves, I am so sick of the addition of text and voice to games, of it is fucking revolutionary you says?

<just cracked voice of 15 year old> haha i wtfpwn you you %*^*% *#*& coc^&*&er *#$(&# </just cracked voice of 15 year old>

Yeah

What a revolution

I support this decision wholeheartedley, thank you Nintendo for sparing me.
Dexter345's Avatar
Dexter345 at 02/28/2008 01:43
Nintendo is officially a parody of itself when it comes to online gaming. It's like, people make ridiculous exaggerations about how bad they are at it, but then Nintendo goes and actually does it.
Gen Eric Gui's Avatar
Gen Eric Gui at 02/28/2008 01:48
@Jim: VC doesn't matter a damn whit. I never use it and I have no problem setting up online matches with people. And is it honestly THAT fucking important to you to be able to badmouth your opponent when you beat them?

If we were talking about some kind of squad-based shooter where you need to co-ordinate attacks and strategies, then yes, complain all you want about the lack of VC online. But for fucking MARIO KART? You guys are throwing the biggest damn hissy fit over something so completely trivial as Voice Chat in a damn KART RACING GAME. Think about that for a second.
Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 02/28/2008 01:49
"I support this decision wholeheartedley, thank you Nintendo for sparing me."

Yeah, 'cos there's NO such thing as a mute button, is there? Thank GOD for Nintendo and its nannying of grown men who can't seem to think for themselves. Hurrah!

I mute anyone I don't like on XBL, and only put my headset on when I'm with friends. See, when I play games online, I generally do it with friends for a SOCIAL experience. After all, that's part of what online gaming is about.

Nintendo should never have even fucking bothered and stayed in its "People don't want online games," shell.
Hiltz's Avatar
Hiltz at 02/28/2008 01:50
Nintendo's safe approach to online is doing more harm than good. Friend codes are inconvenient and the lack of basic features such as voice cha and even proper text messaging is unacceptable in this day and age. I understand that Nintendo likes to do things differently, but alienating gamers is not a wise move.

I don't personally don't care all that much about voice chat as I'm not much of an online gamer to begin with.In fact, I never use it even in games like Counter-Strike. However, the feature would be nice to have in games like Brawl and Mario Lart and it would show that Nintendo is headed in the right direction with their online strategy.Unfortunately, it seems as this rate, that Nintendo may not change its mind until it releases its next new home console and starts to realize and correct its past mistakes. Hopefully.

On the bright side, as long as Mario Kart turns out to be a fun and well made game, then I can pretty much forgive its disappointing lack of proper online communication.
Pangloss's Avatar
Pangloss at 02/28/2008 01:51
Basically, my question is this: why is the comment thread not a long series of facepalms?
topgeargorilla's Avatar
topgeargorilla at 02/28/2008 01:56
I'll just use Live for the voice chat, then play Smash and Mario Kart online. Problem solved ghetto-style.

I should not have to do this though.
Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 02/28/2008 01:58
"Basically, my question is this: why is the comment thread not a long series of facepalms?"

Because some people love the idea of saying "Let's race!" over and over again, apparently.
Sharpless's Avatar
Sharpless at 02/28/2008 02:00
The issue isn't just that we can't talk to each other in a racing game. This is quite possibly a sign of things to come, not just for Mario Kart and Brawl, but for whatever else Nintendo comes out with. What happens when they release their own Resistance or Halo or Call of Duty without voice or text chat?

Nintendo does not know how to run an online service. Period. If they continue to operate in this way, they will begin to lose their fanbase. Eventually, they're going to feel it.
Gen Eric Gui's Avatar
Gen Eric Gui at 02/28/2008 02:00
Or some people don't give a fuck about talking online, and just want to play the damn game.
Pangloss's Avatar
Pangloss at 02/28/2008 02:05
@Jim:
I myself don't necessarily need voice or text chat for online gaming, but I'm surprised anyone doesn't think this is a stupid decision on Nintendo's part.

Also,
Namelessted's Avatar
Namelessted at 02/28/2008 02:06
FUCK Nintendo. seriously. They either need to scrap online play completely or fucking do it right.

And I have a message for all of you people that say "voice chat doesn't matter". YOU ARE FUCKING STUPID FUCKING IDIOTIC MORONS THAT HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT. SHUT THE FUCK UP. GROW SOME FUCKING BALLS AND STOP LETTING NINTENDO POUND YOU IN THE FUCKING ASSHOLE WITH THEIR $10 MILLION DICK.
topgeargorilla's Avatar
topgeargorilla at 02/28/2008 02:07
What he said.
Gen Eric Gui's Avatar
Gen Eric Gui at 02/28/2008 02:08
Concerning that last comment, I'd like to clarify that I do think it's silly to leave the option out entirely. I mean the put VC into Planet Puzzle League for chrissakes. The thing I'm objecting to is the fact that everyone's making such a huge fucking deal over it! Yeah, it kinda sucks that I can't vocally taunt my opponents when I hit them with a turtle shell, but I'm still PLAYING MARIO KART ONLINE.
Toneman's Avatar
Toneman at 02/28/2008 02:08
@ Gen Eric Gui.
Get a group of friends together and play Mario Kart Double Dash, Smash Bros Melee, what have you. Play one round where nobody talks at all. For the second round have everyone write 4 messages on peices paper and use them for communication. For the third round actually talk and yell at eachother.

When you're done, come back and tell us which round was the most fun.

If you're not up for this 3 round test then STFU.
Gen Eric Gui's Avatar
Gen Eric Gui at 02/28/2008 02:10
@Namelessted: Can you say that you HONESTLY would rather not play Mario Kart online AT ALL, EVER, than have to play it without voice chat?

Right. Fuck the "Do it right or not at all" comments. That's a fucking stupid, ass-backwards way of thinking.
angusm's Avatar
angusm at 02/28/2008 02:12
They make me regret buying my wii more and more everyday.
Most of the people I know who own a 360, one of the bigger reasons they got it, "so I could play with all my friends on xbox live".
Seriously, online stuff, pretty important.
And voice chat is hella important, because gaming doesn't give much time for texting, and without communication what's the point in playing with your friends?
Pangloss's Avatar
Pangloss at 02/28/2008 02:13
@Gen Eric: I'm glad it's online. That should go without saying. That doesn't mean this is good news. Au contraire, it's fucking horrible.
AgentMOO's Avatar
AgentMOO at 02/28/2008 02:40
Custom msg: HHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!

But to be completely serious; the people who want these features are not the target audience. Nintendo wants to be able to sell to moms and dads who can play online without learning fun new words like cunt, clusterfuck, and fag.

Nintendo's not being stupid, just playing it safe with their target crowd which is, unfortunately not us.
vexed alex's Avatar
vexed alex at 02/28/2008 02:40
@ Jim

The same argument you just made for Mario Kart I made for Smash Brothers and still people insisted, "well, you see I don't want to talk to strangers. If you really want to talk to your friends you can use the phone." I felt like I was talking to Reggie's dinosaur ass himself. It was retarded.
chickennoodlespraypaint's Avatar
chickennoodlespraypaint at 02/28/2008 02:51
am i the only person that really hates voice chat?
i pretty much hate the majority of people that play online and use voice chat... it just makes me sad that i play video games... and so do these people...
i really dont like the fixed text... i really dont like to have any form of communication with the other person im playing against. but if "Hi!" is going to be a fixed text choice... then it will be spammed to the fullest until the race starts... or whenever you can do it.

"Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi!"
BlackSunEmpire's Avatar
BlackSunEmpire at 02/28/2008 02:57
I'm glad they aren't going to let anyone write anything they want, if theres one thing that offends me more than hearing someone voice chat a swear word, it's having to fucking read one.
vexed alex's Avatar
vexed alex at 02/28/2008 02:59
@ chicken

Clearly you're an anti-social laking any friends. Clearly.

Can you people get it through your thick skulls that voice chat isn't only meant for chatting it away with strangers?

I have friends. I sometimes don't have them around my house. We got on our consoles and we play. We talk while we play. We have a good time. See what I'm getting at?

You hating the feature doesn't mean it should be stripped away. Give people the option to use it. It's a standard, Nintendo.
prev next 50 comments

Returning Dtoiders: login now to post a comment

Destructoid is an open discussion community. You don't need to "audition" to post a comment - just Create an avatar now - it's fast and free: PLUS you also get your own gaming blog and begin posting stories and uploading videos in our open community area that may also appear on our home page. Sign up and we'll guide you through it, it's easy and 100% anonymous.




 Original Videos

 Reviews
Mad Dog McCree Gunslinger Pack
Overlord II
Yosumin Live!
Let's Tap
Ghostbusters: The Video Game (Wii)
View all Game Reviews

 Community blogs -   39764 Dtoiders!

This month's theme: Untapped Potential

New to Dtoid? Read the survival guide


 Originals

The best and worst '4th' videogames EVER!











more original Destructoid stories



 Popular now more













Destructoid is:
Nick Chester
Editor-in-Chief
Jim Sterling
Reviews Editor
Dale North
News Editor
Hamza Aziz
Community Manager
Anthony Burch
Features Editor
Rey Gutierrez
Video editor & director
Niero
Founder, publisher
Letters to the editors
tips@destructoid.com
Associate Editors
Ashley Davis Jonathan Holmes
Brad Nicholson Jonathan Ross
Brad Rice Jordan Devore
Chad Concelmo Matthew Razak
Colette Bennett Tom Fronczak
Conrad Zimmerman Topher Cantler
Dyson Samit Sarkar
Contributors
Adam Dork
Ben Perlee
Daniel Lingen
Joseph Leray
Joe Burling
Mikey
Will Maddock
Stella Wong




get involved

register or login
post a blog
post a forum
enter a contest
discuss a review
contribute a news tip
write a guest editorial
support

new member's guide
login assistance
tech support
report abuse
email our editors
read our dev blog
nuclear crisis?
keep in touch

RSS feed
Twitter
Facebook
Myspace
Flickr
Game nights
Meet-ups
seriously

about us
advertising
terms of use
privacy policy
jobs at MM
buy our crap
our network

Tomopop
Japanator




Destructoid is an independently-run publication forged by our love of video games and the gaming community's need of accountable enthusiast press
living the dream since March 16, 2006