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Nintendo to force old people to play Super Mario Bros Wii photo

Grandma: "Sir, can I trouble you for a glass of warm milk? It helps me go to sleep."

Nintendo PR: "You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up!"

Grandma: "My fingers hurt."

Nintendo PR: "Oh, well, now your back's gonna hurt, 'cause you just pulled Wii PR duty. Anybody else's fingers hurt?... I didn't think so."

Okay, so Nintendo isn't quite as rough as the orderly from Happy Gilmore, but I'm sure they've had to use a firm hand at least once in their latest effort, a tour of ten of senior communities. This month, they're bringing around New Super Mario Bros. Wii to the older masses, forcing letting them play the game with local kids.

Out of the goodness of their hearts, they're giving these ten communities and another 42 a gift package that includes a Wii, New Super Mario Bros, Wii Sports Resort, Wii Fit Plus, Mario Kart Wii, and 4 controllers. Not a bad Christmas gift. Naturally, they're pushing the whole grandma can play with the grandkids angle. Clever, that Nintendo. 

For our senior Destructoid readers:

Leisure Care communities
Dec. 4: Fairwinds – Ivey Ranch in Oceanside, Calif.
Dec. 12: La Siena in Phoenix
Dec. 13: Fairwinds – Brittany Park in Woodinville, Wash.
Dec. 19: Harvard Square in Denver
Dec. 20: Heritage Estates in Livermore, Calif.

Erickson communities
Dec. 5: Eagle’s Trace in Houston
Dec. 12: Greenspring in Springfield, Va.
Dec. 12: Ann’s Choice in Warminster, Pa.
Dec. 13: Sedgebrook in Lincolnshire, Ill.
Dec. 19: Brooksby Village in Peabody, Mass.


Continue reading: More wii stories





36 comments | showing # 1 to 36
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Nic128's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 15:44
Nic128
Happy Gilmore is awesome.
Xzyliac's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 15:47
Xzyliac
Old people suck.
Jon B's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 15:47
Jon B
Happy Gilmore reference makes me smile.

Unfortunately I only have it on VHS, with no player. :(


As for the Wii thing, wouldn't there be something better than NSMBW that old people could play?
Like... No More Heroes?
TheDreadHawk's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 15:48
TheDreadHawk
Oh Dale, I love you.
Everyday Legend's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 15:53
Everyday Legend
You misunderstand - No More Heroes would cause them to BAN the Wii, not champion it.
gamadaya's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 15:55
gamadaya
Don't you guys do polls sometimes where you ask age? How old is the oldest person on destructiod. I can't imagine over 50.
Uber Mashu's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 15:55
Uber Mashu
"He died the way he lived."
Isay Isay's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 15:55
Isay Isay
Rats...not a looker in the bunch
Fking Nasa's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 15:56
Fking Nasa
lol, no Florida? This is like the senior citizen state, AND YET NO FLORIDA FOR DATES?
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:16
Elsa
LOL! I bought that game for my nephew for Christmas... and yeah, he'll probably make this old lady play the game with him! :)

Actually I think it's GREAT that nintendo is bringing the Wii to some retirement homes though! :)
Calleh's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:19
Calleh
No Brawl?
Ax23000's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:25
Ax23000
And someday Xzyliac, you too will be one of them.
Bigmoose85's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:26
Bigmoose85
this shit makes me sick... what the fuck happened to Nintendo?
Xzyliac's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:31
Xzyliac
@Ax2300
I hope I die before I get old.

Live by the creed, die by the creed.
mr showtime's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:32
mr showtime
Why not Call of Duty? See if it brings up any memories.


One the real, NSMBW is WAAAYY too hard for kids who've never played Mario games before. There's no way Granny Blue-Lettuce is gonna be able to get past world 1-3 before chucking a remote at the TV and cursing everyone out in the home.
bobyoko's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:37
bobyoko
like anybody has to be forced to play that amazing game, dale. i would have loved to play videogames with my grandparents when i was a kid.

if you want games to become real, lasting art, it does have to become mainstream. nintendo is making sure that we all get to enjoy gaming into our later years. once again, nintendo proves themselves as the only progressive company in gaming.
Artemus's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:37
Artemus
Ha ha! Oh my gawd...
Wii Bowling is one thing, but New Super Mario Bros. is another!
Ridiculous.
Jon Bloodspray's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:49
Jon Bloodspray
Fuck you Nintendo. I'm poor and I grew up one your wares. Give me some free shit, I'll actually enjoy it.
Ball Buster's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 16:55
Ball Buster
In this story: Nintendo feeds the trolls.

@Artemus

It's a little harder to throw your plastic hip out while playing Mario.
comradetrotskii's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 17:05
comradetrotskii
I'd like to see them on world 9. Some of that shit knocked about a year from my life.

[i]As for the Wii thing, wouldn't there be something better than NSMBW that old people could play?
Like... No More Heroes?[/i]

Do we want old people to think that games are shit? Actually, given how startlingly simple the mechanics are it is probably the perfect introduction for idiots/old people to action games.
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 18:03
Elsa
@gamadaya... why would you imagine that older people don't come to Destructoid? I'm 47 and I'm pretty certain I'm nowhere close to being the oldest gamer here. My husband is a gamer and he's 52 and while his typing sucks, he certainly reads Destructoid. I suspect that older gamers are just like female gamers... there are lots of them out there - they're just fairly quiet (maybe they're plotting! LOL!)
jettpack's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 18:05
jettpack
look at those old bitches hands. You know when old people accidentally grab you really hard with out knowing. That shit creeps me out. It feels like they don't want you to leave because they are feeding on your youth.
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 18:05
Elsa
Oh... and @Xzyliac... young people suck!!

(not get offa my lawn!)
lewness's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 18:05
lewness
Hmmm, I'd rather see them try play Rabbids Go Home.
StMcDuck's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 18:35
StMcDuck
Forcing the elderly to play Twister at gunpoint. That's my idea of a happy Christmas.
Xzyliac's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 18:47
Xzyliac
@Elsa
Pfft, whatever! We're an unstoppable force of vigor! We'll do what we want!

...just as soon as our parents loan us a few bucks. :P
pedrovay2003's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 18:57
pedrovay2003
I taught elderly people to play Wii Sports once. I got on the news for it, too. They seemed to enjoy it, but I don't know about a classic Mario game.
callmeAlex's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 19:03
callmeAlex
I can barely get down the "shake controller to pick up stuff" thing, I can only seeing this confusing the elderly even more in a world of plumbers eating mushrooms so they can get bigger and defeat dinosaurs who kidnapped a princess.
dunderdolt's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 19:07
dunderdolt
I hate the Wii.

I hate that I spent over 300 dollars on Wii games for my daughter and wife.

Feeding the casual gamers, I am.
callmeAlex's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 19:15
callmeAlex
@dunderdolt

Sounds a bit harsh. I would think the act of buying things for your family to make them happy would overshadow the fact that you're begrudgingly "feeding the casual gamers."
Ganjookie's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 19:17
Ganjookie
There is a brunette cutie w/ glasses in the background. She looks bored to death.
Xzyliac's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 19:29
Xzyliac
@Ganjookie
Now unless my iPhone size is failing me I am almost certain that's a little kid.
super2j's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 19:30
super2j
how long until grandma on the right tackles little billy for being douchy and jumping on her head multiple times making her fall to her death. (of course im talking about real life not the game ;) )
Ball Buster's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 21:05
Ball Buster
@Xzyliac-

To the right of green shirt kid's head. That's what he meant.
VGFreak1225's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/08/2009 21:19
VGFreak1225
My mom works at a rehab center, and she uses the Wii to work with the elderly all the time. I don't think NSMBW is what she generally uses though. Though I suppose it could work as a tool for bonding with the family.
Jayson Napolitano's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/09/2009 18:36
Jayson Napolitano
Happy Gilmore reference? AWESOME.
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