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What a shocker. A celebrity has a Nintendo DS in her hands ... and is playing Brain Training! Wow, only Brain Age or Nintendogs could ramp up the cliche' levels. Tom Cruise's former snatch of the month, Nicole Kidman, has begun her campaign to be the pale face of the DS by advertising that she's utterly rubbish at More Brain Training, something I don't find impossible to believe if her ability to play rock, paper, scissors is anything like her ability to pick relationship material.
 
Look at her, she can't conceive that she got a score of 52.  You show that mad Japanese professor who's boss, Nicole! We're rooting for you. Speak into that mic. Speak loud and ... oh. Oh, well no wonder you're losing, how do you expect it to understand Australian!? No cookie for you! Still, could be worse, you could be stuck with Tom and his Scientology pals, worshipping the corpse of L. Ron Hubbard twice nightly and frying ghosts off your body with little electroboxes.
 
Anyway, this works perfectly with Nintendo's plan to keep their hooks in this so-called 'casual' market. All I can do is repeat what was asked in the comments thread for this video -- what does a game of chance have to do with your intelligence?

Continue: More Marketing Shill stories





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41 comments | showing # 1 to 41

Necros's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 11:27
Necros
It's official: SCISSORS! is the new BLUE!
BluDesign's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 11:32
BluDesign
blue.

blue.

Blue.

BLUE!

BLUE!

FUCKING BLUE!

BL-UE!

BALOO!

... !

blue = Baloo?
WTF?!
LadyLucifer's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 11:34
LadyLucifer
She's a special kind of idiot...

On a serious note: RPS is pretty badass.

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1761338
LadyLucifer's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 11:41
LadyLucifer
#0000FF


AKA


BLUE.
tazarthayoot's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 11:41
tazarthayoot
duh...ROCK..NO! SCISSOR! NO! YOU BATHTURD!
Nick Chester's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 11:48
Nick Chester
Oh wow! Nicole Kidman is just a normal person! She plays Brain Age on the Nintendo DS! I have to go buy one, too!
phamtq's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 11:56
phamtq
What's with all the hate? Jesus christ.

I say having Nicole Kidman as a rep is a good choice. I don't know if you've noticed but gaming still has a stigma attached to it. By making it more mainstream, it not only helps the industry but also helps removes the nasty assumptions people have about us not unlike the assumptions some of us have about other people.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 11:58
Jim Sterling
pham: I'm all for gaming getting the mainstream attention it needs. The commercial's just dumb is all. :)
phamtq's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:03
phamtq
Dumb for gamers like us perhaps but most likely it works very well with the rest of the public.
Altair78's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:03
Altair78
It's a cute-ish commercial. I don't mind it much.

It's not making me want to buy one (since all Nicole Kidmans is sold seperately)... but it's still cute.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:05
Jim Sterling
pham: Which is why I didn't say 'remove this dumb advert'. I just joked about it.
sadecki's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:10
sadecki
This is some hard-hitting video game journalism. I'm so glad there is a hard-core gaming site for hard-core gamers.

But, seriously, I'm glad someone finally stuck it to Nicole Kidman because she's never bothered anyone ever and, frankly, I'm sick of it. All worth it to read the phrase 'snatch of the month.' The product of an all-nighter for sure but worth every second.
Dale North's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:11
Dale North
nicky is still a looker. Game still sucks.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:22
Jim Sterling
Haha, I wasn't even that fucking harsh. I love it.
phamtq's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:27
phamtq
I don't know. Maybe it's because all the comments I read on websites that have women who most people consider at least somewhat attractive eventually ends with how they're skanks or how their knees are crooked.

It gets annoying after awhile.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:33
Jim Sterling
pham: I don't mind Nicole Kidman. It was jokery, settle down. People need not take it so personally.
imbeta's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:38
imbeta
I don't find it cute when girls hit their foreheads... one thing is for them to hide that they may not be very smart, but when they become physical about it... egh.
iliketuna's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:44
iliketuna
i love how she says "paper" at the end. that was hot
bhive01's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:45
bhive01
Clockwork's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:45
Clockwork
So apparently she's left handed. Anyone catch that besides me? Yeah...I'm going to go back in my little corner now.
bhive01's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:46
bhive01
Excellent. A blank comment. I assure you it wasn't blank when I posted it.
bhive01's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:47
bhive01


There we go...
Samit Sarkar's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 12:57
Samit Sarkar
HAWT.
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 13:01
Sharpless
Dumb commercial. I don't mind it, though. If it gets more people involved in playing games, then I see no harm, be they casual or hardcore. Speaking of hardcore, Nicole will always look good to me, airbrushy face or not.

*imagines an Alba/Kidman DS threesome*
MaxVest's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 13:26
MaxVest
@JimSterling: I think the point of the game is you have to say which item will defeat the one shown to you. It shows you "rock," so you have to say "paper" or "acid rain" to defeat it. Kind of like the yellow font on the word "blue" in BT1.

Now that's a game I'd like to play at Vegas. The dealer shows scissors: what do you say? What DO you SAY??
Mxyzptlk's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 13:27
Mxyzptlk
What the hell is More Brain Training? When did this come out?
0bshaky's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 13:39
0bshaky
LOL! Nicely written! How old is she? Like 50 right? That happens when you have money that doesnt get spent thru the nostrils...
phamtq's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 14:01
phamtq
@JimSterling:

Taking it personally? Maybe you should re-read your post. If you don't like the commercial than whatever. I'm sure you've got more writing skills than to resort to talking about a woman's snatch in an attempt to play the "I'm clever by bashing" card.



Bricfa's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 14:24
Bricfa
I thought when Jim said snatch he was not referring to a vagina, but more like when you go to a seafood place and order the "catch of the day" kinda thing.

on another note, are we in some kind of pre-E3 drought? It seems no good news has come out recently.
Bricfa's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 14:25
Bricfa
Or maybe...
It's a clever pun that means both!
Jacki Jinx's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 14:45
Jacki Jinx
Thank you, Nicole Kidman! You make women look smarter by the minute -__-
Niero's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 14:55
Niero
Dressing in white while playing Nintendo products is an absolute must. Failure to do so is punishable by premature aging.
MaxVest's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 15:37
MaxVest
The whole dressing-in-white thing could be worse... Nintendo could be forcing people to dress in metallic rose.

Metallic Rose: Good faux-70s band name, heinous handheld color.
StrawberryFFuck's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 17:39
StrawberryFFuck
She looks pretty cute in that commercial.
Doesn't make me wanna buy one though.
Then again I don't want to play brain age.

I like her cause she is a great actress.
*see: to die for.
RJG's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 18:14
RJG
FTA: Look at her, she can't conceive that she got a score of 52

Oooh, that's a low blow. It made me laugh though, so it's alright.

For those of you who don't know, Nicole Kidman has lots of rumours going on about her apparent lack of fertility. Apparently she miscarried and that was the result of her break up with Tom Cruise and she has since lost a baby with her new husband Keith Urban.

I never thought I'd see the day I'd see such tabloid allusions on Destructoid.
aborto thefetus's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 18:17
aborto thefetus
@phamtq
Jesus christ man, you are over-friggin reacting!!!
She is a woman, she is a celebrity, people refering to her as dumb or a whore is pretty much inevetible. calm down.
Morrius's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 18:17
Morrius
Rock.
Rock.
ROCK.
ROH HOCK.
ROCK-A.
ROOOOOCK.

Crappy voice detection aside, my grandad owns her at this game, and he hasn't got a clue what's going on. Still, can't knock Nicole, even if I do have to watch her massacre The Golden Compass... She's universally recognised and massively uncontroversial - perfect Nintendo material.
Michymaster's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/26/2007 18:25
Michymaster
she is so fuckin hot
Lord_Satorious's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/27/2007 02:07
Lord_Satorious
Nicole Kidman is hot. That's all I care about.
Dexter345's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/27/2007 02:19
Dexter345
Rock, Paper, Scissors is not a game of luck. It's a game of wits. Check it.
ffmusicdj's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/27/2007 08:28
ffmusicdj
You! Thats actually a good commercial! I liked it!
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