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Hey kid, wanna see a dead body? Oh. Well. You wanna see some really cool video game news... In the back of my van?

Uh. Anyway. The guy from Crytek says the PS Vita is gonna fail, and the guy from Naughty Dog says the Wii U is gonna fail. Girls who eat Doritos and play video games really like to have sex, but hate taking baths. Or something. Aliens: Infestation has butts, cursing, gore, Xenomorphs, and I'm chomping at the bit to pre-order it (once it gets announced.) The 3DS is selling like whatever the opposite of wildfire and hotcakes is, Bastion looks cool, and Metro: Last Light doesn't have any lights in it.

Also, we're doing a kickass LIVE show next Friday, at 4 PM Pacific, 7 PM Eastern. It's Friday night, so I don't feel like looking up the metric time.





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Max Scoville is the co-host of The Destructoid Show on Revision 3 and left-leg component of the original Megazord. Born in France, raised in Connecticut, and while he studied painting & drawing at the SF Art Institute his true passion is entertaining others. Likes The intro to Super Metroid, Uppercutting somebody in Mortal Kombat, Lucasarts 1989-1998, The "!" noise in Metal Gear Solid, Duke Nukem 3D's puerile sense of humor, Frank Zappa, Steve Martin, and William Gibson. Meet the rest of the team



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15 comments | showing # 1 to 15
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Namodacranks's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 00:15
Namodacranks
Oh HELLS NAW! Habanero Doritos or GTFO! I wish they still sold those... *cry*
skateallday101's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 01:15
skateallday101
NICE NEW VIDEO. CAPS F' YEAH
Kieran Hubbard's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 01:20
Kieran Hubbard
"Australian anti-fun video game banning board" genius x)
D Sane's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 01:34
D Sane
Normally I don't do this...but Tara Long's cleavage FTW.
dare's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 01:53
dare
"Cool Ranch or GTFO. I don't want that nacho cheese shit up in here." Ah man, that was the best.
Mr Andy Dixon's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 02:01
Mr Andy Dixon
Normally I don't do this... but what D Sane said.
Gzilla2188's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 02:46
Gzilla2188
@Namodacranks I don't know where you live, but here in California they still sell them. Frankly I'm tired of them and have moved on to Doritos Flamas!!!!
redrum331's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 04:12
redrum331
PSP Vita might struggle, but until phones or tablets incorporate controllers somehow, portable consoles will still be around. Poll about girls was funny though
GameQueen's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 07:06
GameQueen
Anyone know if that Bastion game will be available on PC as well? Don't have an X-Box but I hope like a lot of those games, they just end up on STEAM eventually. Hopefully.
Samwise's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 10:52
Samwise
@GameQueen

I wouldn't expect it, at least for a year. Summer of arcade = MS exclusive for a year if not ever.
glutto's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/16/2011 16:40
glutto
Stopped eating Doritos when I noticed they have MSG in them.

This was not easy to do.
Sparkles the Unicorn Princess's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/17/2011 06:15
Sparkles the Unicorn Princess
I'd get in your van Max
ikiryou's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/17/2011 09:21
ikiryou
Tara is better than sex.

Wait, what?
comicretard's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/17/2011 22:02
comicretard
Lawl @ whatever the oppisite of wildfire and hotcakes is
BeckerRosalind34345488's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/21/2011 14:15
BeckerRosalind34345488
I paid $32.67 for a XBOX 360 and my mom got a 17 inch Toshiba laptop for $94.83 being delivered to our house tomorrow by FedEX. I will never again pay expensive retail prices at stores. I even sold a 46 inch HDTV to my boss for $650 and it only cost me $52.78 to get. Here is the website we using to get all this stuff,
BidsOut .com
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