So, this is what I do with my life now. I find screenshots of videogames and sexy people, put them together, then post them on the internet.
Why do I do this? Well, the technical reasons are still there (I didn't want to these screens to auto-stretch too much, so they all needed borders of some kind) but I think it may be a bit deeper than that. Perhaps it has something to do with a deep subconscious desire to be accepted, or less-than-subtle interest in making people horny. Regardless, this stuff seemed to go over well last time, so I guess I'll go at it again.
As you gaze upon these "enhanced" screenshots, please keep in mind the sacrifice that I am making for you. Thanks to posts like these, I will never be able to run for any elected office in the United States. All it takes now is a quick Google search for "Jonathan Holmes" and "sex" to reveal to the voting public excatly how I spent my early 30's; spreading the gospel about boobs, butts, and videogames.
You're welcome.
[via Nintendo.co.jp]
LAUNCH GALLERY (4 IMAGES)
Jonathan Holmes is the most lovable Associate Editor on Destructoid. Catch him on videos, original editorials, and on back episodes of the Destructoid Show and MTV's Road Rules. Jonathan is a retro gamer's gamer.
Likes
Mega Man 2, Resident Evil, Katamari Damacy, Bit.Trip, Metal Slug 3
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Contest:
11:00 PM on 10.24.2009
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Also I would imagine one of the rooms in hell would be having to go through the shame of hugging your grandmother while wearing one of those.
"Also I would imagine one of the rooms in hell would be having to go through the shame of hugging your grandmother while wearing one of those."
Priceless...
Also, I'm looking forward to this rebirth game!
@D-503
That's the magic of steroids!!! I could be wrong though, he might just have bad penis genes, I work out but don't go anywhere near the stuff 'pros' use, or people like him. Being in shape is good enough for me.
oh journalism...
Behold, Jonathon Holmes.
Why don't you guys just change the name to destructoidchan.org and get it over with.
There's, there's just no way to talk about a game when an impossible ass is/has been on the screen. That thing looks like a pecan/walnut/not-what-a-human-butt-ought-to-look-like!
She is Purddddy...:)
Hurray for gratitude, guys. Shit like that just makes me not want to be a "gamer" anymore.
Anyways, I think I'm looking forward to this more than any big retail releases coming up.
Damn, the desktop that could have been ..minus gigantor and the red thong of scariness of course
The game looks faily cool - but why not just make a decent new 2D `vania? Oh whatever.
Good post. A micro-melting pot of retarded muscle-man induced humour, boner coaxing asian gals and Castlevania. Good work mr. Holmes, you win.