The Destructoid Bordello received an ominous box this week from Ohio Dtoider Pendelton21, whose package luckily did not contain glitter-coated elephant feces. Instead, we were treated to the following items of win:

• A book from the 50's: "What, Where, When, and How to Drink" which contains a collection of essays by various gentlemen on when it is fine and socially  appropriate to hit the sauce in the precense of others.  There's one guy in there named Toots Shor.  I ever get a parakeet he shall be named this.
• A decorative mushroom tile from his grandmother's house that may indeed double as a coaster, life partner, or wobbly ninja projectile for self defense.
• A copy of Warpspeed for the Genesis in excellent condition. Eva from Tomopop actually knew what this game was and was super excited to see it in original packaging. (She's reluctantly modeling the prize in the gallery below.)
• A Dr. Wily figurine found at the bottom of a "free" box from a garage sale.
• A perler Super Mario Brothers 2 potion and a Mr. Destructoid head!

Winner!  Thanks so much, this really made our day.  Your video game of choice and Dtoid swag package will be on the way shortly. (Email me dood)

You can be next! WTF is this shit?

Destructoid's having a year-long contest where you, our dear reader, sends us random crap to decorate our office with -- the cheaper and more retarded the better (hit those thrift shops!).  If we choose yours we'll buy you any retail game of your choice.  Check out the rules for more info.  Thanks for reading us and good luck!