What's big, fat, royal, and can't seem to find proper fitting boxing trunks? King Hippo, of course! King Hippo is easily the most recognizable fighter from the original Punch-Out!! on the NES besides Mike Tys-- I mean, Mr. Dream himself. Oh, I'm sure the bandage-punching memories are coming back to you now, aren't they?
Hailing from the mysterious "Hippo Island" in the equally mysterious "South Pacific", King Hippo is a rotund rumbler with a mouth bigger than NamelessTed's restraining order rapsheet. Before you even have a chance to take a swing at the big guy, he's already slandering your mother and talking about how he slept with your sister last weekend. Granted, I'm only guessing at this, though I'm pretty sure that's what his grunts mean.
Hit the jump to read on and watch the original fight.
The King was easily the most unique fighter within the game with the strangest problem of them all -- his pants kept falling down when he got punched in the mouth, revealing a secret weak point in his seemingly invincible blubber. If he knew the pants didn't fit right, why didn't he just get a belt? I mean, he did lose to nine other people. It's not like he didn't already know what poeple are going to aim for. Moron.
After a few tummy punches, the giant stumbles backward and gets an automatic 10-count. Where's your crown, King Nothi-- err ... Hippo? Way to go, Little Mac. You did us proud with your psuedo-junk punches, but we'll overlook that since you're part of the Nintendo Fun Club.
That's all for today, ladies and gents. As usual, if you have any suggestions for future Miniboss Mondays, shoot us an e-mail at email@example.com.