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Minesweeper : The Movie

9:13 PM on 08.06.2007   |   Dale North


If you've seen one video game movie, you've seen them all, right? Yeah, I get where you're coming from. All of them, from Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within to the mess that was the Mortal Kombats were total disasters (except maybe Silent Hill, send hate mail to dalenorth@dontcare.com), always missing the mark and leaving us disappointed. 

There is still hope. One more golden franchise of gaming remains, but it's not what you're thinking. It's not a first-person shooter, and it's definitely not The Sims (kill me now) - it's a bit more casual than that. Grandmas, soccer moms, and bored office workers rejoice: Minesweeper: The Movie is coming. 

The brilliant minds at College Humor bring us the trailer to the movie based on the classic Microsoft Windows timewaster. This is certain to be the first video game blockbuster.

Commander: "Why are you here soldier?"

Officer: "I'm here because I'm bored!"








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Dale North is Destructoid's Editor-In-Chief, a founding editor, and specialist in Japanese gaming. An accomplished musician, Dale was reporting from Japan during the earthquakes of 2011. Luckily, he got the fuck out alive and is home in America now with his wife and beloved corgi, Einstein. Dale is also a co-founder of Destructoid's sister anime site Japanator. Likes Corgis, Sega Saturn, PSP, iPhone, Photographic tools. Meet the rest of the team



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62 comments | showing # 1 to 50
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next 50 comments

BigPopaGamer's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:13
BigPopaGamer
Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
kwaselow's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:19
kwaselow
*applauds*
BlindsideDork's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:20
BlindsideDork
Those 8's.....bastards!
Hoygeit's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:23
Hoygeit
WHOO!!!

cjpkiller's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:23
cjpkiller
that was beautiful
Arugala9's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:26
Arugala9
Awesome
Neonie's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:27
Neonie
8randomly clicks a square*
Neonie's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:28
Neonie
It DIVIDED BY ZERO! OH SHI-
Doomtrain's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:30
Doomtrain
Funny.
Pangloss's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:36
Pangloss
Man, I hate it when I have to guess.
Yooree's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:37
Yooree
-"Why are you here soldier?"
="Because I'm bored!"
-"And don't you forget it."

Pretty much sums it up right there.
kawitchate's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:46
kawitchate
"WHY ARE THESE MINES EVEN HERE!!!" ftw!
MechaMonkey's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 21:55
MechaMonkey
When the timer reaches 999:

"What happens then?"

"Nothing. You just suck."

This movie must be made.
Trevor McGee's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 22:20
Trevor McGee
Do people actually play Minesweeper anymore?
CannibalCalvin 's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 22:26
CannibalCalvin
It took me a bit to figure out who the yellow guy was. Very clever.
Justin Villasenor's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 22:39
Justin Villasenor
Best. Trailer. Ever.
Tino's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 22:44
Tino
Oh wow. I didn't realize who the yellow guy was for about 3-4 hours.
mikeasux's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 22:50
mikeasux
I it;s about that time we kill some movie director, just for the sake, eh?
tkyy's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 23:00
tkyy
I thought the yellow guy's bald.
Bad casting!
Scrixx's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 23:05
Scrixx
This brings me tears of joy :)
Baron Calico's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 23:06
Baron Calico
What if we get an 8?
13thDragon's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/06/2007 23:36
13thDragon
Dammit, now I feel like playing Minesweeper.
Dadud's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 00:20
Dadud
Hahaha, "Oh calm down, its never the first one." *Kaboom*
goodgamer77's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 00:34
goodgamer77
This is 2.13x funnier if your grandma really did play Minesweeper.
bmdubya's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 00:45
bmdubya
That little trailer right there is like 100X better than any movie Michael Bay tries to pull out of his ass.
Aaron Mxy Yost's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 01:09
Aaron Mxy Yost
Needs a spunky love interest.
s0lesurviv0r's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 01:24
s0lesurviv0r
That convinced me to play ye ole minesweeper for the first time on my computer. I was surprised to find they added sound effects to the game, when the hell did that happen?
crimson diabolik's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 01:57
crimson diabolik
Great, now I've got the urge to play Minesweeper. For the first time in 10 years.

On a side note, am I only one who thinks a redone Minesweeper with updated graphics would be great for XBLA? I personally wouldn't mind shelling out $5 for it.
Cloudiroth's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 02:34
Cloudiroth
? Why are they all two-stripe-ers?? Even the commander...
Myrmidon16's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 11:54
Myrmidon16
lol that was awesome. its already better that ne video game movie
Mack_'s Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 12:32
Mack_
man i was way too addicted to minesweeper back in the day...
IAteASeagull's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 14:41
IAteASeagull
Please note this was not made by any "brilliant minds" at College Humor. They just sponsored it. Elephant Larry, a New York comedy troupe was hired to write and create it on their own. If you like the hilarity of this video, then you'll like more of their work on their OWN website:

http://www.elephantlarry.com/
Noctane's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 18:02
Noctane
So is there really going to be a 90 minute movie?

That would be alsum.
Noctane's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/07/2007 18:05
Noctane
nevermind, its not. =(
denilw's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/08/2007 04:05
denilw
The guy's hand are still attached to the shovel after he explodes! Action-packed movie!
ridley80's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/08/2007 16:19
ridley80
That was actually exciting.
BlueFalcon's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/12/2007 18:14
BlueFalcon
i havent cried this much since Aries died (ffVII)
that was way too funny
BooYaHOTSAUCE's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/16/2007 11:07
BooYaHOTSAUCE
Funny... in fact, nearing hilarious.

I'll probably watch that again later today.

Random side note: KING OF KONG: A FISTFUL OF QUARTERS is a badass gaming movie that should be seen by every living soul on the planet. If a theater near (or far from) you is showing this movie, it's worth going. One of the best things I've seen this summer. Beats the shit out of Transformers or whatever other crap has opened lately.

Trust me... see the thing.

Watch el trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3K7wpatALDQ&mode=related&search=
waly666's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2007 21:49
waly666
So.... whats next?Can any of you Imagine How Pac-man Movie would be??
Darren Nakamura's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/09/2007 17:11
Darren Nakamura
I don't know how I missed this the first time, but it was great.
Daniel Husky Lingen's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/13/2007 21:57
Daniel Husky Lingen
Holy fucking shit

I want them to make that for real so bad
Teta's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/18/2007 11:24
Teta
How did i miss this? This is like the best game based movie EVAR!
Excel-2011's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/22/2007 09:09
Excel-2011
Not impressed until I see Freecell: The Movie.
zavage's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/16/2008 21:04
zavage
the clock doesn't stop until it hits 999. what happens after that? nothing you just suck lols!
mourning orange's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/18/2008 18:02
mourning orange
stfuajpg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tiffany67116947's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/27/2009 03:35
tiffany67116947
Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
miklesera's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/29/2009 02:25
miklesera
Grandmas, soccer moms, and bored office workers rejoice: Minesweeper: The Movie is coming.
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