Quantcast


Microsoft opening up its own retail chain photo

Microsoft might not be able to build a fully functioning console, but that hasn't stopped the company from planning to open a string of official retail outlets across America. Will the buildings be made of thin cardboard and pieces of biscuit? Yes. Yes they will.

Former head of‭ ‬worldwide product distribution at‭ ‬DreamWorks Animation David Porter will be spearheading the new initiative.

"We’re working hard to transform the PC and Microsoft buying experience at retail by improving the articulation and demonstration of the Microsoft innovation and value proposition," said Porter, in what is probably one of the most convoluted and confusing bits of salesman speak I've seen in a while. What exactly is the Microsoft innovation and value proposition, and where can I get some?

So far, details are thin on the ground regarding store locations, numbers and products.  Some recent concept art for the store shows plenty of Xbox 360 stuff. Hey, maybe the store could offer Xbox repairs -- you could guarantee a vast amount of business that way.








More gaming stories around the web. Got news? Submit yours to tips@destructoid.com

Jim Sterling serves as reviews editor for Destructoid.com, head of the Podtoid podcast, and produces a number of news stories, original features, one-of-a-kind videos. With his passionate argumentative style, controversial opinions, harsh delivery, and dedication to brutal honesty Sterling is a name that you can't help but recognize. Likes PS2, iPod Touch, Silent Hill 2, Metal Gear Solid, Dynasty Warriors 3 Meet the rest of the team



Post a comment! You can also post a photo below:

Comment with Facebook





Click connect and comment instantly!

Comment with Dtoid





New? SIGN UP - it takes 5 seconds

34 comments | showing # 1 to 34
prev next

TheStripe's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 08:43
TheStripe
Lolz. It's unlikely they'll be able to staff any sort of hardware support in the store. Mostly because they don't make computer hardware, and won't bother to train staff for the relatively fewer numbers of Xbox repairs. It'll be a great place to drop off your Redringer and come back every two days to yell at someone while they send it out for 4-6 weeks. First Windows 7, now this. They really, really want to be Apple, don't they?
John B's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 08:47
John B
"Microsoft innovation"

Read: Technology that we've stolen from other companies, just like we've done since the days of DOS, dBase, and OS/2.

"Value proposition"

This coming for the same wankers who want $150 for a usable, retail version of Windows?! Microsoft has no clue what the world "value" means!

I really would love to know what they think they're going to add to anything. They'll never beat places like NewEgg for Windows and applications and they'll never have prices lower than places like Best Buy or they'll risk screams of anti-competitive behavior.

This is nothing more than Apple Store envy.

And I think that it will completely fail because Microsoft does not have the strong, fanboy loyalty that Apple has, nor do they have the social "cool" stigma that Apple has.

What a total waste of time.
ZombiePlatypus's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 08:50
ZombiePlatypus
Unless they have some good deals or stock some kind of groovy exclusives I'd have absolutely no reason to shop there rather than anywhere already existing, like say Best Buy...
Guagloves's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 08:50
Guagloves
Are you kidding me? Do we really need this?
Wedge's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 08:53
Wedge
Wat?

No seriously, wtf are they going to sell here? Like, does Microsoft plan on selling their own brand of computers now too? Or are they going to be selling pre-built systems from a few companies? And then have a 360 section. So it'll be... a Microsoft only mini Best-Buy? Yeah I fail to see how this makes any sense.
coffeesash's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 08:57
coffeesash
"improving the articulation and demonstration of the Microsoft innovation and value proposition" just means that if they have their own shop, they can have staff that give biased advice :)
AgentMOO's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 09:04
AgentMOO
lol@ walk-in repair shops
Thomaticus's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 09:18
Thomaticus
bad idea, I think that they want to emulate the Apple Store, however Apple store works, because they have products that people want. The only MS product that people want is xbox, and I just don't think that a MS speciality store will have any good deals. However, I'll shop there if they can create good deals ... and offer a good rewards program.
sickNasty's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 09:25
sickNasty
I hope it's overly pretentious and hip just like Apple Stores...
glandseck's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 09:27
glandseck
There's an eery glow of "Trashy" emanating from those screenshots... I can't quite put my finger on it. Is it the awful lighting that makes people look dead, the shoe store warehouse ceiling, the general cheap look of everything? All of the above? Hrrmmm...
falinter's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 09:29
falinter
I would go in there just to mess with the cool ass Surface tables.
gains's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 09:56
gains
If they're serious about this they need to abandon the big box store look of that concept art and change the direction to more of a shop or boutique setting. I've never been in an Apple store that wasn't just a standard spot in a mall (granted I'm in NJ, where everything is a mall.) To try to make Best Buy or Walmart stores that stack 360s to the rafters is a waste.

Plus, they NEED a service desk. Everyone who walks in that door will expect the same treatment they get from Geek Squad and Genius Bar. They'll upset a lot of potential customers who come in with a RROD'ing machine and are told to go home and call tech support.
Infinite Obscurity's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 10:02
Infinite Obscurity
This might not turn out too bad. Hopefully it would be like the Nintendo World store, where they have contests, tournaments and giveaways.Hold on, just looked at the concept art and god that looks horrible. Why so many boring greys and boring office type desks. They need some more bright green up in that bitch.
silvain's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 10:06
silvain
Translation: If we have our own store, then we don't have to lose the 10% markup to the other retailers.

I'm surprised it took this long, and they are choosing maybe the worst time to open this style of retail. The consumer is broke.
John B's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 10:20
John B
They're going to lose a hell of a lot more than the 10% markup when it comes to expenses -- capital expenses, buildings, maintenance, employees, payroll, real estate taxes or leases, disgruntled employee lawsuits (you know they're inevitable in this pathetic "Sue Everyone" society), and so forth. They're probably better off giving the 10% to the middlemen.

But, yes, this economy is a really stupid time to be opening a chain store that only MS fanboys are going to go to anyway.
TehBoognish's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 10:24
TehBoognish
Finally!


A single place to focus the fire bombings at!
funran's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 10:28
funran
If they actually do this they will have to be like Walmart or Bestbuy and actually sell their competitors stuff. They won't make enough money just selling Microsoft products.
Char Aznable's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 10:36
Char Aznable
Bias. Clearly.
Qraze's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 10:43
Qraze
they just love to practice monopolising in almost every thing they do despite a government breakup of their company.
hpv's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 10:54
hpv
I can't wait for DOJ to come back on the scene and finally do what they should have done in the 90s: break up Microsoft into a bunch of little Microsofts.

Windows would die and the rest of their products would improve, at least the ones that aren't staying afloat merely on the strength of the Windows/Office monopoly.
Pangloss's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 11:59
Pangloss
I didn't see a dedicated service desk, but if they had one of those (and tweaked the style a fair bit) I could see this actually not being the worst Microsoft idea all year.

The only big problems I can foresee are Microsoft trying to jump on the Lifestyle Product bandwagon with Apple, and doing the whole "rounded edges and glossy white EVERYWHERE" design thing. That will probably sound fantastic to the boardrooms and marketing people, but will only mean that now I hate Microsoft for everything I hate about Apple.

The face-to-face dedicated, earnest customer service effort is something to pick up, though. I really do think that sort of thing could do wonders for Microsoft's image.
FinalFist's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:03
FinalFist
LOL'd @ "value proposition". Hookers!
Shoop's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:07
Shoop
Microsoft isn't a monopoly. There are other OSs and productivity software out there.
vexed alex's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 13:26
vexed alex
I don't see the point of all this.
argon's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 13:36
argon
So are we talking biscuits like popeye's chicken-biscuits or biscuits as in american crackers/England biscuits?

Cuz Popeyes biscuits walls would be fucking win
Char Aznable's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 13:55
Char Aznable
Argon, I concur. Popeye's Biscuit Walls would be amazing.

That was the most random sentence I've ever typed.
welkstar's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 13:59
welkstar
That's wild. I hear the stores will mostly be focused on demonstrating the OS, and Windows Mobile.

All I know is, we have a Sony store here that rarely gets business because it is next door to an Apple store.

Best of luck Microsoft!
Wexx's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 14:19
Wexx
They're taking a step backwards. Digital Distribution is the future, they need to be funding ways to make that more widespread.
Drach's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 14:58
Drach
hey.. Last time I checked, Apple stock was stomping MS's stock into the ground. This will not make your stocks gain value. If your stores fail, your stock will decrease in value. Look at Circuit City. They opened a store here in the 90's They used an old vacant department store for their storefront. A few years later they left that building, leveled a forest, and built a new building less than a mile away... Now they're going out of business? LOL. making new outlets for consumers does not boost your business. It costs money to make a new store and storefront. I only own 3 disc games for my 360, and a few downloads. I see this being a huge mistake on Microsoft's part. There are already a ton of retail chains that sell these games.. we don't need another. Are they going to ask me for $59.99 if I come in with a question about Windows, like they do with their telephone support? Service is a good question everyone brought up.. Are these stores going to be a hub for Angry Video Game Nerds that have broken Xboxes? Honestly MS, people don't have the money for this.. and you as a large company should work on something that will help the economy, and not divide more of it amongst yourselves... What am I talking about? They LOVE seeing people squirm for cash.
Then again, a place like that means newer jobs... >thinks<
Johnny Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 15:03
Johnny Justice
I wonder if they'll have Songsmith demonstrations.
Syn's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 16:04
Syn
Well it's not the first...or even the second time M$ has ripped Apple off. I mean...look at WINDOWS!
If there is one thing Bill Gates is good at, it's ripping people off. He's the most successful, and accepted thief in all of history.
Barcode's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 16:10
Barcode
I wonder if they'd make one in Ohio. Whether it be in Columbus or cincy.
Thomaticus's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 23:56
Thomaticus
The store needs to set up Tournaments, and other community events. Parties, tournaments, meetups, etc. I don't want to say that its a bad idea, because these stores could actually do some good w/ the MS brand. But it all comes down to prodcuts offered, and the deals available for them.
Purringturtle's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/15/2009 00:08
Purringturtle
I am so excited by this! I can get a brown Zune, a console that will break in three months, and an overpriced buggy OS all at the same time! Why didn't they come out with this sooner?

Sorry, just can't get excited by this. I almost never am excited by "boutique" stores. They are almost always more expensive and pretentious than they are worth. I'm done badmouthing MS.. for now.
prev next

Comment with Facebook





Click connect and comment instantly!

Comment with Dtoid





New? SIGN UP - it takes 5 seconds

Comments policy

Destructoid is an open discussion community. You don't need to "audition" to post a comment - just speak your mind. We respect differing opinions on the site, so have at it. Be smart, funny, insightful, clueless, or cute -- but back it up with substance. Keep your cool, keep it fun. We only ask that you act respectfully and above all: don't be a troll and ruin it for everyone else. Don't bring down gamers or we'll, you know, gently shoot you in the face and stuff you into a flaming mailbox. Each comment is your opportuntity to make this community awesomer. Is that even a word?

Avoiding the banhammer only requires common sense: spamming, trolling, racism, NSFW stuff, and other forms of sucking will not be tolerated. If anyone is griefing please report abuse. Be good. Don't suck!