Michael "Next, I'm going to bang your mom" Bay has just been revealed as the director for the Prince of Persia movie. Jerry Bruckheimer, the producer of such hits as Pirates of 21 Jump Street and CSI: Miami, has been slowly putting this whole thing together, and earlier today, IESB.net got word that Bruckheimer has tapped Bay to sit in the fancy chair for the film, which is now slated for a Summer 2009 release.
You might have heard of Mr. Bay from his past hits, such as The Rock or Pearl Harbor, or perhaps you will recall that he's the guy drawing the ire of the Internet for utterly corrupting our beautiful, innocent childhood memories with his upcoming cinematic abortion: Transformers. While we, the Internet, can agree he has a history of making things 'splode real nice, his latest venture is mind-numbingly idiotic; the man is trying to top Orson Welles' final films, with Tyrese, and a "reimagined" Megatron who epitomizes the term vagina dentata.
The problem with a Michael-Bay-helmed Prince of Persia lies in the fact that the series has always been about puzzle-solving, as opposed to stabbing everyone's head off with a rocket launcher. I'm almost positive that Bay's version of PoP will star Vin Diesel, Ludacris, and Andy Richter, and that the Prince will have no less than five exploding sex scenes.
As for what an exploding sex scene is, you'll have to see it for yourself; only in theaters, Summer 2009.
Contest:
6:03 AM on 04.16.2007
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[BORAT PAUSE UNTIL 2009]
Zzz...
NOT!
anyway, it's a movie about giant fucking robots. i'm thrilled. you can't dumb that down no matter how much you think the original was complex because it wasn't. giant robots that transform into things. children's play things.
as far as a PoP movie goes, if they make a movie akin to the pirates of the caribbean films it could be totally amazing and everyone knows it. a movie like that, one that is big on fantastic action and adventure would be real cool. i like to think that michael bay can easily redirect his pension for fast-paced explosive action scenes and translate them into breathtaking wall running/jumping/puzzle scenes. you hafta admit the guy can make a great chase scene. now imagine those chases being across entire castles and especially their walls and such. it could be cool. just give it a chance.
Although, I'm really hoping they don't keep with the lips the whole movie. He has a face plate for battle. If he realizes how awkward his lips are and becomes very self concious about his appearance, I'll be fine.
The thing people need to remember is that the new Transformer movie is not G1. It's just another retelling. Hasbro has been doing this since the franchise started. Constantly rebooting to sell new toys.
although, you do make a valid point about game movies. but i think you meant BAD game movies need to die. studios need to take their time and do the IPs justice. *cough*doom*cough*
And I firmly believe the Transformers movie is going to turn out pretty cool, despite the legions of manbabies crying about how their childhood is being raped because Megatron turns into an alien jet instead of a gun and Bumblebee is a Camaro instead of a VW Bug. No offense, manbabies.
Also, as stated before, giant boxes making goofy noises as they impossibly squish and squash to fit a 30 tonne robot into a 2 tonne machine would look goofy on screen.
Formula for a Transformers movie that is faithful:
1) Giant robots crash into Earth. -- check
2) Bad Giant robots follow as well. -- check
3) Giant robots turn into vehicles(or later, animals) -- check
4) Giant robots fight each other either in the presence of children or young adults -- check
5) Cheezy "You've got the touch" music -- okay, not check(thankfully)
that is all.