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Matt Hazard will lead to our 2012 demise and other facts photo

You really ought to commend the folks at Maverick PR (and Vicious Cycle Software) for their work on Matt Hazard. They've done a tremendous job of creating a back-story for the videogame character who's got a fictional past, both in and outside of the games.

If you haven't come to grips with the fact that game characters have their own Facebook accounts, I honestly don't blame you. But you know what? It makes sense for Matt Hazard to be involved with social networking.

His page has hit the 1,000 follower mark, which is cause for celebration, apparently. Basically, it's an excuse for us to get more Matt Hazard fiction. Don't have a Facebook account? That makes two of us. Thankfully, we have the full "fun facts" located past the break.

Go take a look; they are pretty amusing.

Matt Hazard’s Fun Facts #5:  What Equals 1,000?

Great Milestones in Hazard’s Career That Involve the Number 1,000

  • Matt Hazard has knocked virtual, cowboy, commando, rubber, space marine , pirate, racing and jack boots with more than 1,000 virtual pixelated (8-bit, 16-bit, 32-bit and beyond) babes over the course of his career.  A feat unlikely to be surpassed even by the likes of that horny dwarf in that new RPG from those D&D dudes in Canada.
  • Ancient Mayans have prophesized that on December 12, 2012, 1,000 people will play Matt Hazard: Blood Bath and Beyond simultaneously, thus unleashing an intense wave of kickassitude that could crack the earth itself in two.
  • Hazard once appeared in a little-known first person shooter called Corona, a cancelled next-gen launch title.  In the game, Matt Hazard plays through the same level more than 1,000 individual times, as he is forced to backtrack repeatedly through the space in separate missions.  While the game was never shipped, the design was noteworthy and was later copied by other companies.  This became known as “Bungie-Jump Gameplay” for its relentlessly repetitive back-and-forth style.
  • Matt Hazard once set a World Record for “Easiest Way To Achieve 1,000 Achievement Points.”
  • In Matt Hazard 3D, Matt Hazard quotes more than 1,000 lines from a single cult classic horror/comedy movie.  With the writing staff seriously hungover from the “Marathon Keg Marathon” Holiday party, the lead designer resorted to copying an old movie script, and in the process set a new definition for “homage.”  The historic line that put Hazard over 1,000 was: “Good… Bad... I’m the guy with the BFG.”
  • In the hit series starring Matt and Dexter, 1,000 cheats were hidden in the menu system for Murder Force.  By entering the passcode “1K” at the menu, you were then allowed to enter one of several codes, including: MSDQD (God Mode), MSKFA (All Weapons and Ammo), MSMSC (Give Matt Double Muscles) and MSFIN (Game Plays Itself To Completion With Perfect Score)
  • “The Tentacle Beast of Tramm” in Conflict of the Deities originally boasted 1,000 Armored Tentacles – so large that the concept art had to be drawn on the outside of the 4-story Marathon office building. Given the limitations of 16-bit processing, however, the tentacle count was reduced to only 2, creating a more manageable battle.  The revised concept art for the new creature was drawn on a bar napkin in Vegas casino, and traced the outline of a spilled “Cape Codder.”
  • It takes 1,000 gallons of virtual blood to fill one exploding Giant Penguin.  Which may explain the yakking Penguin inability to keep it all in.

Continue: More PR Nightmare! stories





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8 comments | showing # 1 to 8

Zombutler's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/23/2009 18:57
Zombutler
If only his game wasn't a pile of shit.
RenagadePanda's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/23/2009 19:00
RenagadePanda
Matt Hazard once set a World Record for “Easiest Way To Achieve 1,000 Achievement Points.”

Hardly. Although I did 1000 point it, I don't know of many who did. Some of them were just plain frustrating.

Oh wait, they're kidding? Well, thats kind of funny I guess.
Solid Squirrel's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/23/2009 19:07
Solid Squirrel
Man, I wish there was more humor in video games like this. Not a lot mind you--last thing we need is a parody video game surge not unlike the overdone zombie genre.
ArrestedDeveloper's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/23/2009 19:23
ArrestedDeveloper
I actually just picked this game up for $10, I'm glad I didn't pay $60.
Birdman the Friendly's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/23/2009 19:36
Birdman the Friendly
@ RenagadePanda
I got all of them but one- for completing the game on the hardest difficulty. Seriously, fuck that.
RenagadePanda's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/23/2009 19:55
RenagadePanda
Birdman the Friendly

Yeah, I had more trouble with the Check the Grenade achievement, the thing failed to register several times and I just randomly got it. Bedlam Basher wasn't much better.
shinigamiDude's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/23/2009 22:43
shinigamiDude
They only expect 1000 people to play their game? lol
Turbofail's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/24/2009 08:13
Turbofail
lol @ Corona joke
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