Six-year-old Eliso Tovar was given a late Christmas present by his mother recently in the form of a PSP. Unfortunately, it turned out to be the gift that kept on giving, when it was discovered that the console, freshly purchased from Walmart, was stuffed to the digital gills with delicious porn.
Alarm bells were already ringing when the console's wallpaper was discovered to be a woman with her bulbous funtumors hanging out. It only got worse when "hundreds of pornographic images" were found by the bemused boy. Walmart has offered a free PSP game to go with the system by way of recompense, but the mother wants a whole new PSP, apparently unwilling to touch one that has been tainted by sick filth and could now transmit AIDS, even when all the pictures are deleted.
Which is a bit of a waste of time, really. Eliso's got a taste for the stuff now, and he'll just put a load more on when nobody's looking. That disgusting little pervert.
Jim Sterling serves as reviews editor for Destructoid.com, head of the Podtoid podcast, and produces a number of news stories, original features, one-of-a-kind videos. With his passionate argumentative style, controversial opinions, harsh delivery, and dedication to brutal honesty Sterling is a name that you can't help but recognize.
Likes
PS2, iPod Touch, Silent Hill 2, Metal Gear Solid, Dynasty Warriors 3
Meet the rest of the team
| BBcode help |
| [b]Bold text[/b] |
Bold text |
| [i]Italic text[/i] |
Italic text |
| [url]http://www.dtoid.com/[/url] |
http://www.dtoid.com |
| [url=http://www.dtoid.com/]Web link[/url] |
Web link |
| [img]http://www.example.com/robot.jpg[/img] |
 |
Post a comment! You can also post a photo below:
Comment with Facebook
Click connect and comment instantly!
|
Comment with Dtoid
New? SIGN UP - it takes 5 seconds
|
35 comments | showing # 1 to 35
|
Comment with Facebook
Click connect and comment instantly!
|
Comment with Dtoid
New? SIGN UP - it takes 5 seconds
|
Comments policy
Destructoid is an open discussion community. You don't need to "audition" to post a comment - just speak your mind. We respect differing opinions on the site, so have at it. Be smart, funny, insightful, clueless, or cute -- but back it up with substance. Keep your cool, keep it fun. We only ask that you act respectfully and above all: don't be a troll and ruin it for everyone else. Don't bring down gamers or we'll, you know, gently shoot you in the face and stuff you into a flaming mailbox. Each comment is your opportuntity to make this community awesomer. Is that even a word?
Avoiding the banhammer only requires common sense: spamming, trolling, racism, NSFW stuff, and other forms of sucking will not be tolerated. If anyone is griefing please report abuse. Be good. Don't suck!
That's what the mother gets for giving a christmas present in april
Then again, one guy returned a 360 and I couldn't be bothered to set it up (no nearby TV either), so it went back to Electronics. XD
That's awesome! 'a woman with her bulbous funtumors hanging out.' You do know your way with words my dear sire.
Nowadays, kids just have to pop on the PC or get their mom to buy a PSP. Lazy ass kids...
If it were my kid, I'd be mad. Mostly because I bought a used system for new...
Kidding aside, I'd be pissed that my kid was exposed to porn before I would like him to have been. It's funny to read about it, but if it was your 6-year old, I'm sure you'd want to rip someone's head off.
I'd also be demanding a brand new PSP as well as something more than a free game; maybe a gift card or more games. They took a used system and sold it to me new, as well as exposed my kid to adult material. If I want that kind of treatment, I'd go to Gamestop.
if i got a PSP loaded with porn when i was a kid i would have shut my fucking mouth and enjoyed it.
whats wrong with kids these days?
Did you hear about the guy who bough a used GTA4 for his 12 year old son (read over 18s only) to find 4 ecstacy pills in the box?
Winner in my book! He knew exactly what they were, mitsi's apparently.
Seriously though, i would be seriously pissed buying new and getting used like that. They should give him way more than a new PSP, they've got some grovelling to do!
I can't fit porn on my PSP anymore - that cunt of a game LocoRoco2 (for the mrs) takes up pretty much my whole 2gig mem stick!
Is that the best you could do?
Also an actually pretty good reason to want a replacement. They paid new money for a used PSP. And that's used in the worst sense- there could be spunk on that screen for all she knows.
Also, if that PSP is tainted, mine would be the devil itself. ;)
Good times.
Fun stuff.
My roommate found a playboy from 1993 in his PS3 box.
I hope this becomes a trend