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Leaked pages from the Asteroids movie screenplay photo

[vitaminh stumbled upon the greatest find on the Internet ever! More pages may show up in the future too! -- CTZ]

I know I'm not the only one eagerly awaiting the upcoming movie based on the classic videogame Asteroids, so when some random pages from the script ended up in my mailbox, I knew I had to share. Keep in mind that this is a mere taste of the buffet of awesomeness we have to look forward to gorging ourselves on and, even though this is probably an early draft, there may be SPOILERS.

You have been warned.

 







This movie needs to be released right now.

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50 comments | showing # 1 to 50

MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 03:18
MrSadistic
the asteroid needs to wear a black trench coat, dark shades and be able to pull off bullet time maneuvers!!!
vitaminh's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 03:23
vitaminh
Maybe he trades his cape for a trench coat later in the movie and does that stuff... or maybe he has a badass henchman who pulls off sweet kung-fu moves in slow motion. The possibilities are endless!

Can you see why I'm so excited about this movie?
Monodi's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 03:28
Monodi
Oh hey Megan Fox!
MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 03:31
MrSadistic
the asteroid also needs to have all these awesome combat maneuvers he got during his years in a secret government program!! his dad also needs to be Liam Neeson!!
vitaminh's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 03:41
vitaminh
Maybe the asteroid not only has awesome combat maneuvers from his years in a secret government program, but also bionic implants so he can shoot lasers from his eyes! And a jet pack!
PhazonYoshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 05:08
PhazonYoshi
I would pay to see that film. :awesome:
Endstiem's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 07:00
Endstiem
As long as the fight sequences are shot in black & white vector graphics, this baby is taking home the oscar!
The Prodigal Son's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 08:24
The Prodigal Son
Well, I knew it was bullshit, but was worried somebody might take it seriously until I saw "Megan Fox" as a character... If we rebranded the movie as "Assteroids", this script would make for a great start to an excellent adult video.
Justin Villasenor's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 09:25
Justin Villasenor
Best screenplay ever!
Doomsday Forte's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 09:44
Doomsday Forte
I laughed. I cried. I got my money's worth. =P
DocHaus's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 10:48
DocHaus
Does anyone have Michael Bay's number? I smell an Oscar!
Qraze's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2009 23:31
Qraze
go fucking die bitch. its independence day you fuck. celebrate or be a coward faggot.
Hindesite's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 14:03
Hindesite
I literally laughed out loud. Awesome! :D
GoldenGamerXero's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 14:26
GoldenGamerXero
Now this is the worse thing I have ever read but it could sadly happen. I now worry for the fate of Shadow of the Colossus )=
Crunshii's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 14:39
Crunshii
omg.... in other words... its a shitty movie with a hot ass babe.

/fail
Syn's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 14:51
Syn
Wow...if they wanted to fool people they could have made the dialogue not sound like some cliche out of the 50's
Son of BaconSandwhich's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 14:53
Son of BaconSandwhich
I'll take two please.
Hamza CTZ Aziz's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 14:54
Hamza CTZ Aziz
Haha, I think some of you missed that vitaminh made this :)
Dexter345's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 14:56
Dexter345
Bravo!
Drach's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 15:12
Drach
If it weren't for Hamza I would have called shenanigans.
Jon B's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 15:15
Jon B
YES. I WILL TAKE 20 COPIES.
Brandnamecommercial's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 15:26
Brandnamecommercial
BRILLIANT!
DinnertimeNinja's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 15:33
DinnertimeNinja
I guarantee this is better than the real thing.
vitaminh's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 15:35
vitaminh
@Hamza - No way, this came straight from my top-secret Hollywood source ;-)
mikeyed's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 15:39
mikeyed
Megan Fox is such a versatile actress.
whatisdelicious's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 15:40
whatisdelicious
So much YES.
Blackhat's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 16:06
Blackhat
Good God, how many people here actually thought this was real?
Ganjookie's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 16:07
Ganjookie
LOL this is better then the actual movie will be!
brimtastic's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 16:33
brimtastic
Wow make this naow!
foolishwolf's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 17:18
foolishwolf
"You're the best Dad of all time!"
"And you're the best son of all time."

LMAO. So ridiculous and hilarious.
MrFwankie's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 18:29
MrFwankie
Bravo.
Celdurant's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 18:40
Celdurant
Two thumbs up. I'd pay to watch this twice!
Banana Kid's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 18:44
Banana Kid
If they're actually going to make this movie, THIS is how they should do it. Just make it as stupid and awesome as possible.
Furyfire's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 19:22
Furyfire
WOOT!
Jack Maverick's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 19:23
Jack Maverick
"Kickin' some asteroid ass?" I was expecting "Kickin' some ass-teroid" or some type of silly play on words. Other than that, this is nice.
Clarke's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 19:40
Clarke
The "An Air Force officer(COLONEL LOGG) and DAAAAAAAAAAD!!!! gave it away.
xe-cute's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 19:44
xe-cute
Honestly, what a load of crap. What is is with America and crap movies?
Rigby's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 21:07
Rigby
If I were to do a drinking game on the number of commenters who totally missed that this isn't real, I'd be pretty smashed right now.
TheCleaningGuy's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 21:30
TheCleaningGuy
The fact that Megan Fox's character is just named Megan Fox is sheer brilliance.
CRAZYAPE69's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 22:03
CRAZYAPE69
'I AM LORD ASTEROID, AND I AM HERE TO DESTROY YOUR WORLD HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH' that instantly deters me from ever producing my wallet to buy tickets for this film.
Chronic Logic's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 23:02
Chronic Logic
Ah, Megan Fox. The only reason the Transformers movie is alive.
JohnnyJustice's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/05/2009 23:53
JohnnyJustice
Fuck that, I know Bob Page is responsible for the asteroid attack.
Brilliant screenplay!
Justmitch's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2009 00:16
Justmitch
Hahaha wtf T.R.Iandle wing fghter cant wait to see how that looks like.I guess they didnt go for tri fighter so as to not copy star wars.?
MechaMonkey's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2009 01:28
MechaMonkey
I would watch this over whatever Hollywood produces.
Emrah's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2009 06:36
Emrah
Anything with Megan Fox is instant win. Tho she can't act to save her life. But she'll learn.
Themightylebeau2009's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2009 06:58
Themightylebeau2009
So you have the script but can your hollywood source get 'concept' art?
Would like to see the T.R.I.Anglewing in pre-production.

Very entertaining read. Im going to go and start on my Arkanoid script before Hollywood picks that one up too.
whormongr's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2009 11:28
whormongr
I don't understand the concept of making an asteroids movie- if it sticks to the game it will be boring and if it doesn't it'll be stupid- you seriously could have a better movie with just about any other arcade game from the 80s- hell you caold make a better movie out of dig dug
Holyetheline's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2009 13:06
Holyetheline
Script is pretty juicy looking... So far I like what I see.
mekklesack's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2009 16:50
mekklesack
"Megan Fox."
ikiryou's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/12/2009 15:26
ikiryou
Megan who? I just want to watch asteroids destroy 90% of humanity. 'Damned hollywood military better not interfere....
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