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Jenna Jameson videogame incoming? photo

Jenna Jameson is a star. How do I know? Because my girlfriend has her on her MySpace top 48 ... before me. Somehow that's okay and doesn't make her bi-curious with a crush on that chick from the EB Games down the street, but when I put Jenna on my friends list I'm suddenly a pig and just like "Ethan", whoever the hell that is. Whatever ho, I created you, I can destroy you!

Um, so anyway, Jenna Jameson was at Comic-Con last week pimping out her new comic book. The AIDS aura emanating from her booth kept me at a distance, and seeing several of her fans run in that general direction and then abruptly disintegrate like in Mars Attacks! didn't help either. The best I can do is this intelligence-soaked video where Ms. Jameson describes feminism as a "fun, mythological story". You go girl!

Now that she has decided to hang up the vagina and reap the rewards of her many years of hard, throbbing labor, it's inevitable that things like a book, a movie based on that book, a comic book, a clothing line, a toy line, a Best of Jenna soundtrack, an extremely ironic Tito and Jenna sex tape, and eventually a video game, will all make their way to store shelves. 

After all, they made a game based on VIP, and that show could have had Pamela Andersen reading "Green Eggs and Ham" to a bunch of retarded burn victims and it still would have been awesome. Personally, Jenna's looking a bit dried up lately. I'm gonna hold out for a Jesse Jane comic / videogame / pillow case.

So, what kind of game do you think Jenna should have? Have you seen her ping pong trick? It should definitely be included as a mini-game. 


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32 comments | showing # 1 to 32

Lewzr's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 02:26
Lewzr
How's about a sandbox-style, GTA-type thing, where instead of climbing to the top of your mob / gangland empire, you climb to the top of...wait for it...a PORN empire. Oh, you saw that coming?

You start out on the lowly streets of...wherever Jenna grew up. You work as a stripper, so there'd be little rythym based mini-games while you bump and grind on the stage. All the while you make contacts who gives you little missions to do -- deliver this batch of drugs, service this icky porn producer, etc. etc.

While it would never happen, it would definitely be a blast on the Wii. Just imagine what you could do with the Wiimote in a game like this. Or, you know, don't. Because, come to think of it, that's sort of disturbing.
William Haley's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 02:38
William Haley
You realize you'd be playing as the chick, right?
tazarthayoot's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 02:46
tazarthayoot
She already has a game, kinda, right? She has that 3d sex game with her likeness and "voicework" in it.
Detry's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 02:49
Detry
An .flv file download? Tsk tsk.

I You Tube'd the "intelligence-soaked video" for ya. :D


Lewzr's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 02:58
Lewzr
Well, of course you'd be playing as the chick. But chicks can do things with...well, things. You know? Those things. Starts with a D, ends in ILDO. Just saying.
William Haley's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 03:02
William Haley
Yeah dude, but then YOU would be doing those things too. Like when you play a game of Bomberman Live and own three people at once, you don't turn to your girlfriend and go "Did you see what Green Bomberman just did?!" No, you say "Did you see what I just did?"

Thats gross.
Detry's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 03:07
Detry
Lol.


Shaking the Wiimote to get top score for sucking a cock is not..


I refuse to even finish that sentence.
Detry's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 03:09
Detry
*refuse to even finish that sentence


Correction - I threw up a lil bit in my mouth and decided not to finish my post.
Lewzr's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 03:11
Lewzr
I quite agree. Which is why I closed my original comment with "come to think of it, that's sort of disturbing." One of those ideas that seems great when it starts, but after a few moments contemplation, doesn't seem so fantastic anymore.

Or do you mean the whole game in general, and not the just Wiimote part? Okay, I can sort of see that point. But is it really any better to say, "Hey, wow, look what I just did!" after blowing up two dozen cops, stealing a car, and racing back to your hideout in GTA, than it is to say the same thing after screwing a dozen different guys and successfully avoiding a crippling STD?

I think a more interesting question would be, if it was released on the 360, what would the achievements be?
SeventhSense's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 04:05
SeventhSense
Whoever cropped that picture is a bastard.
Rezbit's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 05:25
Rezbit
One of the few funny VGCats.

Anyway, this chick used to be a smokin' hottie. Now she's just old and plastic surgery-ed up. Ain't that a bitch?
Tron Knotts's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 05:39
Tron Knotts
I'm guessing this game will be AO, and for the PC.

But I would play the sandbox game as defined by lewzr. That would be nuts.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 06:45
Jim Sterling
A bit dried up? She looks fucking hideous these days.

Were this videogame based on Penny Flame, Felix Vicious, Susana Spears or Belladonna, we'd be talking. Based on Jennator however? Big fat pass.
JonDarkwood's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 07:20
JonDarkwood
Am I the first person to point out the irony of this comic being published by Virgin?
PwnyBownz's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 07:29
PwnyBownz

I'm thinking the game could be Trauma Center-esque wherein you unbotch a botched vaginoplasty. Now you can make Jenna's vag the way YOU want it. I smell millions of post coital dollars in that venture.
William Haley's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 07:30
William Haley
Darkwood, are you suggesting that Jenna has... done "it"?
Ritalin Twitch's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 07:33
Ritalin Twitch
Before we go casting stones at whores, we must first remember they are the reason most of us get laid.

God bless the whores, may they continue to provide many a nervous nerd their first handjob.
bloodylip's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 07:34
bloodylip
@Jon

I think Virgin publishing the comic is suitable. After all, it will be all those lonely, virgin, man-children who will be buying it.
Johnny Blaze's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 07:48
Johnny Blaze
Yea, for side boobs.. Wrinkled botox side boobs i might add...
Bound's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 08:28
Bound
A videogame based on Belladonna? That would be freaky...
BigPopaGamer's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 08:29
BigPopaGamer
wait...she's not dead? Wow, I'm behind in my whore news. I need to catch up.
NightDehumidifier's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 08:29
NightDehumidifier
I can't belive we're about almost two dozen replies in and still no one even said a thing about Virtual Jenna. Hell my friend who worked at a porn shop at one point in time told me they had the Virtual Jenna game with "attachment".
Oni's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 08:30
Oni
So, how's that heroin workin' out for you? Not too great, eh?

Botched vaginoplasty my fat white ass.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 08:33
Jim Sterling
"A videogame based on Belladonna? That would be freaky..."

Freaky AWESOME, you mean.
tazarthayoot's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 09:24
tazarthayoot
@Sterling

No, just regular freaky. Infact, I find it odd you know so many pornstars names.

lol I remember a few years ago Belladonna was on dateline nbc to talk about how the pornography industry had ruined her life because she "was alienated from her family, and friends and blah blah blah" but they spliced this image of her crying about it with blurred images of her sucking off a black guy. Classy NBC, real classy.
phamtq's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 11:21
phamtq
@tazarthayoot:

"but they spliced this image of her crying about it with blurred images of her sucking off a black guy. Classy NBC, real classy."

HAHA. That made my day.
Diomeneus's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 11:24
Diomeneus
Suprisingly she didn't give the stereotypical model interview. Basically she wasn't a COMPLETE moron in front of the camera... although I've yet to see a model interviewed about something that didn't try to take on that whole "independant and strong women" approach...
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 14:02
Sharpless
@Distrato
MILFs are where it's at, dawg. Come on.

I've never been into any of these popular porn stars, really. Not that I wouldn't fap, or haven't fapped, to them, of course. They're just not my thing, though, in general. I had to turn the interview off because it was getting too vapid.
RWarrior1CO's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 18:17
RWarrior1CO
She actually does have a game already. Sorta. No, I'm not linking it. Screw you.
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/01/2007 19:32
Sharpless
I, uh, played an old demo. Meh. It wasn't the real thing, let's just put it that way.
Orionsaint's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/13/2007 05:06
Orionsaint
She's slowly becoming that girl from gold finger

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