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Japanese Gears of War viral ads; the Japanese are wacky! Who knew?
2:33 AM on 03.30.2007, Nex 29 comments

     Gears of War

Microsoft has never had the kind of kitten-smashing success in Japan that it has enjoyed here in America, but with the release of its Xbox 360, and the system's mega-smash-hit Gears of War, the company is looking to reach out to the Japanese gamer with the oldest trick in the book: viral ads propagated via Youtube featuring an adorable female lead, and unlikely, yet endearing situations!

The above video is the first in the series of girl-meets-monster, girl-befriends-monster, girl-and-monster-hump-like-bunnies videos that Microsoft has thrust upon an unwitting (and all too used to monster-on-girl action) Japanese public.

Hit the jump for more.

[Mad love to Siliconera for bringing this insanity to my attention.] 

Ok, so, here's the recap; Yunnie, Microsoft's adorable, Japanese tentacle-target, talks cheerily into the camera (possibly about Totoro) before hearing eerie noises. Glancing around nervously, one begins to wonder just what lurks on Channel X in her closet. Once the initial sense of dread has passed, she relaxes for a moment, only to have a green, scaly hand pull her off-camera. Pro Tip: There is no shame in admitting you have wet yourself at this point.
Part 2: Yunnie turns out to be a huge attention-whore, and as much as our monster (who I've taken to calling 'Todd') tries to remain hidden in his lair under her bed, she berates him for not coming out to join her in the unrelenting sunlight. Fearing the agony the light would cause, Todd tries vainly to drag the cheery bitch into his subterranean hole, if only to jam a sandwich in her mouth to silence her annoying yammering.
 
The series trails on and on, and at the moment, it has fifteen seperate episodes, all of which are vaguely erotic if you've had enough to drink. Yunnie and Todd eventually become friends, but Todd, overcome with a sense of insecurity formed early in childhood, never gets over his fear of the limelight. Fans of the series have been hoping from day one that Yunnie and Todd would, as the Japanese say, "do it", but so far there has been little to no coitus (that wasn't imagined on message boards, drawn into a series of erotic pictures, and furiously masturbated over).
 
Before I end this post and put a gun squarely against my head, I want to leave you with the greatest video of the series. In it, Yunnie and Todd have formed a deep bond; the kind of bond that can only exist between a beautiful girl and the scaly thing that lives under her bed. Todd retains his trademark bashfulness, and Yunnie her trademark look-at-me-I'm-the-kind-of-girl-who-forensic-scientists-would-say-"was asking for it"-ness, and, by the end of the clip, they, like Felix and Oscar, have learned that opposites sometimes do attract.
 
Heartwarming, no?

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Pangloss's Avatar
Pangloss at 03/30/2007 02:38
The mind, it is blown.
WmV337's Avatar
WmV337 at 03/30/2007 02:43
great find nex!

This is SOO much better then the sony viral marketing, and much more attractive as well.
toast!'s Avatar
toast! at 03/30/2007 02:52
BAHAHAHAHAAHHA

oh man.. that's some good shit

and yes, i did pee myself on the first one :( i kept looking at her door expecting somethin to come flying thru
Husky Hog's Avatar
Husky Hog at 03/30/2007 03:00
oh my god what the hell she clawed herself with her own hand

That's remarkable

<3 the sound effects
Mxyzptlk's Avatar
Mxyzptlk at 03/30/2007 03:01
Needs more tentacle rape.
WmV337's Avatar
WmV337 at 03/30/2007 03:05
as mxyzptlk said, moar!
Dr Hairy Dwarf's Avatar
Dr Hairy Dwarf at 03/30/2007 03:25
How bout a dancing mini game in gears 2 ?
maybe no.
Teamjesus's Avatar
Teamjesus at 03/30/2007 05:21
The last one made me lol, and why don't Japanese people enjoy the hit games we have, like god of war, GTA, halo and gears?
repsode's Avatar
repsode at 03/30/2007 06:51
Japan advertises GoW with a Locust's hands doing Para Para.

That's F**king awesome!!!
Roryzilla's Avatar
Roryzilla at 03/30/2007 07:00
God damn that first one scared the shit out of me. Screw this I'm not watching anymore.
DalaiLiam's Avatar
DalaiLiam at 03/30/2007 07:06
I just ruined jeans. thanks japan.
king3vbo's Avatar
king3vbo at 03/30/2007 07:15
leave it to japan to brighten my morning with yet another fucked up vid

good find nex
908peruvian's Avatar
908peruvian at 03/30/2007 07:35
Urosukidoji: Legend of the Overfiend!!

i saw this yesterday...
that stupid shiet made me JUMP !!
topcow's Avatar
topcow at 03/30/2007 07:44
I blame Japan for spilling my frosted flakes.

I demand restitution.
Brad Rice's Avatar
Brad Rice at 03/30/2007 08:23
Bah Nex, I sent this to you a long time ago. Way to show me love.
Snaileb 's Avatar
Snaileb at 03/30/2007 08:29
I'm with Mxyzptlk

BlindsideDork's Avatar
BlindsideDork at 03/30/2007 08:37
That video i feel is old and lame though!

This is better....

teknohed's Avatar
teknohed at 03/30/2007 09:12
Unfortunately I watched the first one at work. And jumped and screamed like a little girl. Kind of hard to say you "working on the self assessment form" when your screaming like a little bitch. Needless to say I was outed for watching videos of monster on Japanese school girl humping.
Gameboi's Avatar
Gameboi at 03/30/2007 10:20
Gotta love those quirky Japanese folk, and their outlook on what is entertainment. This is one of the more reasonable ads, it seems. Ever seen clips of their game shows? Now that's entertainment at it's finest.
God Len's Avatar
God Len at 03/30/2007 10:39
What's a Japanese?
Brad Rice's Avatar
Brad Rice at 03/30/2007 10:47
Nex, I send links to editors about Japanese stuff. These videos were one of them.
trydizon's Avatar
trydizon at 03/30/2007 15:03
if she was mexican, i would have laughed...
instead, i shat myself.
thanks nex.
ElementalBlazer's Avatar
ElementalBlazer at 03/30/2007 15:18
Damn at that last vid.
drdentz's Avatar
drdentz at 03/30/2007 18:41
Fuck, that scared the shit outta me. I was staring at the door the whole freakin time. GG.
Antimat3r's Avatar
Antimat3r at 03/30/2007 21:52
AHHHHh...my pants were wet 2x...
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