Well it doesn't take him long, does it? The Halo 3 beta was released only last week and that pathetic scavenger Jack Thompson has already leapt upon Microsoft, penis erect with rage, in an attempt to try and take the spotlight away from games and place it firmly back upon himself -- because watching this disturbed old jester masturbate for our viewing pleasure is clearly the most important thing in the world.
Jack Thompson, the middle-aged man who thinks about children playing in their bedrooms, has issued one of his insane, dribbling demands to Bill Gates himself. That's right, the twatspanner is threatening Bill Gates with legal action.
It's the usual deal: Thompson once again seems to believe that it's up to the games industry to make sure that the retail industry do their jobs by not selling games to minors, and issues yet another ill thought out, preposterous legal threat. But ... this is Bill Gates. This could be hilarious. For more, and for the words of Jack Creepy McCreepy Thompson himself, hit the jump.
[Via GameAlmighty]
"Here’s the deal, Mr. Gates: Either Microsoft undertakes dramatic, real steps, through its marketing, wholesale, and retail operations to assure that Halo 3 is not sold, via the Internet and in stores, directly to anyone under 17, or I shall proceed to make sure that Microsoft is held to that standard by appropriate legal means. I have done that before successfully as to Best Buy, and I shall do so again as to Microsoft and all retailers of Halo 3."
The usual garbage, right? Yes it's annoying to read, and infuriating on many levels that this ignorant, possibly psychotic individual is shooting his mouth off in yet another desperate ploy for TV time, but this is something I've been waiting for. This is the day that Jack Thompson tries to threaten Microsoft. With any luck, they are going to slaughter him for this.
Now, I'm no fortune teller, but if I may, I'd like to try and predict Microsoft's unofficial response to Jack's little letter:
"HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
AHA!
AHA!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
That is all.
Contest:
3:33 PM on 05.22.2007
| 
Just, Ugh
On topic: Jesus Jumping JackThompson...what a tool.
Its almost like Don Quixote, fighting dragons that aren't there.
I hope this windmill stops him.
That man needs a hug.
Devs and publishers rating games apropriately, check.
Retailers respecting those ratings and carding folks buying M-Rated games, check.
Parents not purchasing M-Rated titles for little 8 year old Johnny, . . . check?
The only way M-Rated games are getting into the hands of kids these days is from the hands of irresponsible parents. And god forbid someone take some personal responsibility. "The best course of action is to let the government decide what is right for my children! I'm too busy driving my Luxury SUV to overpriced dinners with my trophy wife to raise kids, what do I look like? My illegal immigrant nanny?"
Amerika and their increasing reliance on the government and the courts to raise their children are really starting to piss me off. Almost enough to go on a Crackdown-Style rampage in south Florida.
Man I wish we had Libertarians in England.
i hate to tell jack this, but bill gates has the power to make sure he never "practices" anything ever again.
quick question for jack if anyone wants to forward this to him: when is he going to start attacking parents for not doing their job as parents. i mean seriously, this, plus this law i was reading about earlier today, makes me really wonder when people are going to start addressing the problem that these items over look: parents are the ones responsible. don't buy you kids a game that has a mature rating. i mean yes, i'm sure some id's don't get checked, but parent's buying their kids grand theft auto circumvents the entire perceived problematic system.
What a pathetic human.
and if me messes with M$oft and master chief, he will indeed get pwned like no man hath been pwned before.
Please, Bill Gates will have his pack of lawyers simply legally tear the attention-whore a new one.
I don't have the energy to care about Jack Thompson anymore, hopefully Microsoft takes him down. And i agree with most of you, its time for parents to start taking responsibility...
done and done. Just for you Mxy!
Best I could do on short notice Mxyzptlk
My hero! I didn't realize JT was so hittable from the neck down!
SOMEONE GET THIS MAN LAID!
Phear my amatuer Photoshop skillz
Sure wish there was a Douche Bag clause in our law, because right now he's in the running for stealing away John Edwards BDIU
Sure, but that was when he was still vaguely credible with the majority of the public. Now it's like watching retards in a boxing match, you know you should feel outraged and ashamed about what you're seeing, but you just can't help laughing at the guy. I have the urge to get popcorn every time he opens his mouth now.
(snzzzzzzz)
Thught I'd join the fun, it's too bad Russel Crowe dosen't fight Jacike boy to the death that last scene in Gladiator made me want more...
I doubt he'd go away. All you have to do is talk about "saving the children" and it's all of a sudden unacceptable to even question your platform. "What? You disagree with Jack! You hate kids!" The fact of the matter is that these new initiatives, (as outlined in the next article about the NY State legislature) aren't anything new at all. Jack just better be careful that Microsoft doesn't eat him. There's actually another potentially interesting boiling point that could come about in teh next couple of years. All of Jack's whining could actually bring the film industry into this. You all play halo, right? There's really not a whole lot of blood in that game. In the movies, you need blood and mutiliation for violence to reach an R-rated level. I mean, look at the body counts in all the Bond movies, and all but a scant few of those are PG-13. If JT and the unparents driving this movement can draw a bead on Halo (arguably one of the least graphically violent shooters) Hollywood should certainly ethically be next. Amirite?
Anyway, I'm hoping for a very cocky response :>
Awesome. :)
@ TheStripe:
The difference is Hollywood has been around a lot longer than video games, and everyone alive today has grown up with the cinema. Video games are still a relatively new medium, and a lot of people still think of them as a children's activity. They can grasp the idea of a movie made for adults, but somehow a video game made for adults doesn't register. As today's gamers get older, this will stop being an issue and the media will find a new whipping boy, like those new fangled rocket skateboards.
While we're talking about 007 movies, why can I see Bond kill two dozen bad guys a flick and follow up each death with a bad pun, but I can't see one set of Bond girl tits?
We need to get Jack Thompson laid.
Think about it; sure, he's got a serious bug up his ass, but why? HE'S NOT GETTING ANY.
If we all chip in and get him a hooker, all our troubles could be solved. Who's with me?
...oh, and not a trannie - he's pissed enough as it is.
Yeah, there's a fun editorial in the works on the events of today. Stay tuned, kiddies. It's gonna be a fun fun ride.
I would kill to interview this guy myself. Tell him that. Tell him I want to talk to him!