How to look crazy good, by Microsoft

Hey kids youths and adults, are you tired of looking crazy bad everywhere you go? The thought entered my mind as I passed the Fiber ColonMax(tm) cereal isle and went over to the sugary kiddie breakfast options. There it was, like the Nintendo Kraft whoring of the 90's -- a Pop-Tarts -n- Microsoft schwag solution for my fashion woes. How do I get my crazy good looking Xbox 360(tm) hat? Apparently I have to spend $20 in pop-tarts. Each family-sized box brings about 12 and you'll need three of them, so its about a month's daily regimen of the stuff. In exchange for your narrow breakfast endurance Microsoft will send you a 100% acrylic advertisement you can wear on your forehead in 4-6 weeks, while supplies last, actual design may vary, and it may even be delivered just in time for the 90 degree winter in Miami. But by the looks of that miniature gal, all the ghastly ladies with flying severed heads and no elbows will think you're cool. Crazy cool. [ via Biscayne Publix, Isle 4 ]