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Brittoid: Our UK Podcast
with Hollie Bennett









Here's some A for your SoulCalibur T photo

Voldo's lower horn may not have been a legit SoulCalibur V print ad, but this one is. Surprise, surprise. It's the perfect complement to the original boobalicious ad. These things always happen in pairs.

I'm glad Namco Bandai has acknowledged the peculiarities of "ass men" such as our own Jonathan Holmes. It's not always about breasts, you see.

Also, now I have an excuse to post this 100% tasteful song.

Ivy Sells Soul Calibur V: Take 2 [Andriasang]

LAUNCH GALLERY (1 IMAGES)
Photo









More gaming stories around the web. Got news? Submit yours to tips@destructoid.com

Tony Ponce (aka megaStryke) is a culturally confused, Canadian-born Puerto Rican who grew up in Japan and South Florida ... yet can only speak English. He specializes in writing features and maintaining an immaculate goatee. Likes: Any and all things related to Mega Man, Contra, Castlevania, 2D, PB&J sandwiches, applesauce, and candy corn. Meet the rest of the team



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53 comments | showing # 1 to 50
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next 50 comments

joeman098's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:38
joeman098
that song is now stuck in my head
Themuad's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:38
Themuad
But when will the destructoid staffs foot fetishists get their time
Daze's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:39
Daze
That ads got class.
SirNinjaFace's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:41
SirNinjaFace
Classy AND sexy!
TurboKill's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:42
TurboKill
That is the most sublime song I've ever heard.
AriesWarlock's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:43
AriesWarlock
Covering her ass is one of the things some Japanese were mad about. Check out the first image:
http://3d.skr.jp/3d/3d.php?res=224385
Joe Ess's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:43
Joe Ess
Joe Ess's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:44
Joe Ess
@Themuad

Yeah, and the staffers who are into water sports! Don't forget them!
Epic-Kx's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:50
Epic-Kx
ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS!
[Go stupid, go stupid]
----

Jokes aside, you gotta love Japan.
GlowBear's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:50
GlowBear
......they may as well be selling a game about anal bleaching.
comeonboeltsy's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:56
comeonboeltsy
GUYS, POOP COMES OUT OF THAT.
Shane Saiyan's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:58
Shane Saiyan
Ahhhhhhhh Ass and Titties. I have that on vinyl. Got Assault to sign it when he was here in like........2001 I think? 2002? Something like that.

Good tune. Love booty house. =D
ShadeOfLight's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 11:58
ShadeOfLight
"I’ll tell you what. This steel thong? I’m having second thoughts. It’ll take a team of spelunkers a week to get this thing out of my ass. Do you hear what I’m telling you? It will be an ordeal. Canaries will go in first. Accidents will happen, and men will die. I am talking about a chunk of metal so far up my ass it’s a Goddamn tourist attraction. Families will point and take pictures as their tram winds through my unique internal geography. Alright? The scenario I’m describing takes place in my colon."
arkane9's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:00
arkane9
What about some ads focusing on the abdominal area?
I lurve me some bellybutton action.
manasteel88's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:07
manasteel88
I'm good now. Thanks Namco.
Occams electric toothbrush's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:07
Occams electric toothbrush
Sigh. These ads make me opposite smile.
Sir Tobbii's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:15
Sir Tobbii
This is mostly sad, especially since the game is really good, they could have had a proper ad campaign for it instead. Oh well, if it helps sales I guess I can't blame them
HEL105's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:16
HEL105
I approve of both the ad and the Futurama reference.
VegasDropkick's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:29
VegasDropkick
Shameless marketing is the best marketing. I mean when you have an average rock, paper, scissors fighter coming out, may as well use tits & ass as a selling point.
tekbunny's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:29
tekbunny
Poor ivy. They've turned her into a Hugh Hefner playboy bunny.

Oh well, at least she still has a badass weapon that is in no way a representation of a phallic object.
Nephrite's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:34
Nephrite
That is one FLAT ass!! ...and with that, Soul Calibur 5 FAILS!!!
Corduroy Turtle's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:39
Corduroy Turtle
Isn't Ivy like a hundred now? Gross.
AriesWarlock's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:44
AriesWarlock
@Cordoy

Ivy is eternally 32.
Laharl-KOTNW's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 12:59
Laharl-KOTNW
That ass is terrible. It's flat as hell.
fetusmilk's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 13:16
fetusmilk
i was always a side boob fan, but man i love me some under knuckle.
Gamescook's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 13:35
Gamescook
These ads are still saying, "this game wasn't made for you" if you aren't a straight man. And with the Voldo one not being real, I wouldn't be surprised, not one bit. The status quo of man caves and boys clubs must be maintained. Typical.
STRYKIE's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 13:36
STRYKIE
nfm1337's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 14:06
nfm1337
Perfect example of how to get me to not buy a game. Nice.
Jawmuncher's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 14:21
Jawmuncher
All I could think was

Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
Bracey's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 14:21
Bracey
Could not give a single fuck how they advertise it, but I cannot wait to finally play it!
PrinceHeir's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 14:29
PrinceHeir
FuCK YEAH THAT ASS :P
AceFlibble's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 14:36
AceFlibble
AceFlibble's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 14:43
AceFlibble
Great, and now I feel bad for buying this game.

These adverts are so... beyond words. They're insulting, pathetic, horrifically cynical and a shame on the industry, community and games media.
Captain of the Zanarkand Abes's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 15:05
Captain of the Zanarkand Abes
Blahblahblahblah's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 15:08
Blahblahblahblah
That's... that's not even a nice ass..
KtMack23's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 15:08
KtMack23
A$$
Rammstein's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 15:46
Rammstein
I just pre-ordered this game and I don't even want it. Dat's how powerful DAT IVY ASS is. <3 Ivy.
Nitex's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 15:48
Nitex
It's so shiny and sexy, can... can I lick it?
BS3 Owner's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 16:22
BS3 Owner
Hello I'm BS3 Owner...
& I Approve This Advertisement!
The Cast's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 16:38
The Cast
It's understandable why you would make that song a guilty pleasure...>_> <_<
fightmejimmy's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 17:05
fightmejimmy
They should do one of a gaping anus, too, shitting a carrot
tigervomit's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 17:25
tigervomit
I thought flat ass was the new thing now. I have excite for this game, will be maining Aeon fo sho.
Henriquegds's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 17:42
Henriquegds
Hot?
tigervomit's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 18:17
tigervomit
@Gamescook I totally get your message. I just see it as an unintentional joke. Really poor advertising.
Gorescream's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 19:13
Gorescream
obligatory dat ass comment
Humpty Dance's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 20:08
Humpty Dance
Confirmed Jonathan Holmes is mostly black.
Handy's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 22:04
Handy
Ugh, Namco, don’t make me feel like an asshole for wanting to play this game.
Handy's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/29/2012 22:04
Handy
No pun intended.
caraleo's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2012 06:14
caraleo
the musical references are rocking today man, awesome
GameQueen's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2012 09:16
GameQueen
oh jeez...

So ridiculous.
prev next 50 comments

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