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Heavy Rain is now a text adventure! photo

PC people, rejoice! Sick and tired of hearing Playstation owners talk about their "interactive movie" game Heavy Rain? No longer are we left out in the cold -- Heavy Rain is now available to play right on your computer! Well, kind of...

The fine gentlemen over at Rock, Paper, Shotgun have uncovered a text adventure version of the game, Lots O' Rain, that you can download and play right now, for free! While text may lack the emotional punch that bad voice acting brings, I'm confident that Lots O' Rain captures the core gameplay and ideas of the original.

Enjoy!








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Jonathan Ross is an Associate Editor in Los Angeles who is obsessed with capybaras. Like, seriously, obsessed. If he's not playing Team Fortress 2 or getting into arguments about why PC gaming is superior, he's either off having a fancy dinner with lots of expensive wine, or sitting on the Destructoid IRC complaining that's he's not off having a fancy dinner. Likes: Chrono Trigger, Street Fighter, Steam, everything Blizzard and Valve have ever made, playing Angry Birds on the toilet. Meet the rest of the team



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38 comments | showing # 1 to 38
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ViciousBoston's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:22
ViciousBoston
Something about being sued by the company if it isn't their creation...
ViciousBoston's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:22
ViciousBoston
Something about being sued by the company if it isn't their creation...
Kalmah's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:24
Kalmah
PS3's biggest EXCLUSIVE is now on PC.

/consolewars
wanderingpixel's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:33
wanderingpixel
YAY! Now we Xbox and PC owners can play Rain Heavy!
PixelSith64's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:34
PixelSith64
Wow! I love it! It plays exactly like Heavy Rain down to the smallest detail! Easily a GOTY winner.
Corican's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:35
Corican
If only you weren't posting topless pictures of me in the forums, I might actually be able to see past my cloud of rage and read what you've written here.
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:36
Super Drybones
A giant Whale is throwing Wizards at you at an alarming rate. What would you like to do?
PixelSith64's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:39
PixelSith64
Throw sprear
Kraid's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:49
Kraid
That was entertaining!

This is a contender for my GOTY 2010.
P-Dude's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 18:55
P-Dude
I've never had such emotions evoked by a game before, and if you think there are plot holes THEN YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T GET THE GAME AND ARE A RETARD
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 19:06
Super Drybones
@ PixelSith64

Spear has little effect on Whale as it previously used +4 spear resistance spray. Luckily the spear had a chunk of AIDS on the end. You hide behind rock for 15 years. Whale is defeated.
The Silent Protagonist's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 19:07
The Silent Protagonist
This is fun, because text adventures sometimes parody the real world. A parody of most adventure games would actually be redundant, but since Heavy Rain takes itself so seriously this actually works.
Kraid's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 19:13
Kraid
@Super Drybones : Whale AIDS sounds awesome.
TheDRMaster's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 20:20
TheDRMaster
@Super Drybones: Jump on it and ride that shit.
Xzyliac's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 20:30
Xzyliac
lolwut?
Los255's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 21:21
Los255
Love the title of the game.
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 21:28
Super Drybones
@ TheDRMaster

You jump on Dead Whale. It's not very effective. You begin to grow listless with age, forever haunted by the whale you murdered and then tried to ride for three and a half hours. You wife tries to talk you out of your shame, but you smack her across the face in anger.

You lose 3 dexterity.
DGX Goggles's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 23:15
DGX Goggles
But I can't JAZSONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN like this...

;_;
RIMoonlight's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2010 23:46
RIMoonlight
Patriot Snake is truly the greatest troll of the century.
Mr Andy Dixon's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 00:10
Mr Andy Dixon
^ This

Also, Super Drybones stole the show. Hilarious.
wedgejaeger's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 00:24
wedgejaeger
Cool, now I don't have to go through the trouble of watching a movie I have to unpause occasionally. Now I can have a movie script I can edit occasionally.
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 00:46
Super Drybones
@ mrandydixon
I do what I can for those I love.
PixelSith64's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 02:43
PixelSith64
@Super Drybones

Eat whale
Sexualchocolate's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 04:17
Sexualchocolate
How do the bewbs look in the text adventure?
TheToiletDuck's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 04:39
TheToiletDuck
@SexualChocolate:

(-)(-)
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 04:50
Super Drybones
You decided it is best to eat the whale. After consumption you have pain in stomach. You vomit out sailor bones and are haunted by the whale. You dreams becomes nightmares of being chased by giant whale shaped cakes. You can only gain an erection from watching Free Willy.

You find 5 gold in pile of flop sweat.
Sean Daisy's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 05:57
Sean Daisy
@Super Drybones

>Invest 5 gold in Panamanian steel refineries
zod000's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 05:57
zod000
Oh Zork references...I remember the first time I had to shell into a mainframe and my first thought was to try commands from Zork (was disappointed, no Grues on the servers, only buggy processes)
Sexualchocolate's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 06:46
Sexualchocolate
"RIMoonlight: Patriot Snake is truly the greatest troll of the century."

Sexualchocolate crys a single tear.

"Must try harder"
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 07:01
Super Drybones
You take your 5 gold and place it in 30 stocks of Panamanian steel refineries. You lose everything. You begin to whore yourself out for Silver pieces. It is a cold life. Until one day a MAGIC Pony who only paid half for a handy offers you a single wish as compensation. You wish for 5 gold.

You've gained 5 gold, and memories that will never wash away.
Sean Daisy's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 07:08
Sean Daisy
@Super Drybones

> Place 4 gold in envelope, send to "Cash for Gold" at 1 gold postage. While away time waiting for evaluation of gold by regaling MAGIC pony with stories about the time I invented butter and the time I did a Dragon Punch so powerful that I flew to the top of the Eiffel Tower.
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 07:31
Super Drybones
This needs to be an actual game someday.
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 07:31
Super Drybones
That way the MAGIC PONY, the sac of gold from cash for gold, the whale, and the slowly decaying pile of wizards can live happily ever after.
Enzi's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 09:08
Enzi
What the shit! When I type in "fuck" and the game tells me it doesn't know the word "fuck" then it's a pretty poor console port! Damn these indie developers and their shabby ports. Leave the ports to the big dogs, yo! Like Sega!
Sean Daisy's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 09:43
Sean Daisy
@SD Agreed. This needs to be made.
Mr Andy Dixon's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 11:38
Mr Andy Dixon
This was the greatest thread ever.

Slowclap.gif to Super Drybones and CaptainBus.

Mediumclap.gif to SexualChocolate, just because.
Sir playedallot's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 16:30
Sir playedallot
Patri-idiotic Snake
Your cant be serious! How old are you?
JimmyDanger's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2010 20:59
JimmyDanger
Amazing demo.

This'll be a day one purchase for me.
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