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"My name is Ash, and I am a slave…."

That line is a quote from a classic film, and yet sadly it is also used as a hook for a story all too often. Being the eternal pessimist that I am, I immediately braced myself for the worst while stepping into the world of Funcom's massively multiplayer online game, Age of Conan: Hyborian Adventures. Oddly enough, though, as I continued to wander through the storyline and explore this new world, I became less skeptical of that overused plotline. It seems that Funcom did a fairly good job of incorporating that beginning into at least the first six levels of the game, as you go through chasing down your former slave master with the eventual goal of having your slave shackles removed.

Once this little slave subplot is pretty much completed, you nosedive into the real storyline, which can be summed up as:  I was a badass fighter/mage/rogue/priest who got whacked by a bad guy and now I forgot who I am and what I could do before so will have to remember what I could do and what kind of person I was little by little as I progress through the rest of this game! Yay! Run-on sentences rule! This new storyline will guide you through a series of quests that eventually have you departing the starting isle of Tortage, and leaving a few hundred corpses in your wake. Oh yes, by this point you will likely be level 20. 

I’ll conclude this "mini-walkthrough" and move on to the rest of my hands-on impressions with the private beta of Age of Conan. But first, a tiny bit of the game's background...

Age of Conan is set in Robert E. Howard’s fictional fantasy world of Hyboria. Many a novel, comic book and graphic novel have been written about this world and the iconic characters that live in it. Yes, there were the two Conan movies starring the infamous Governator Arnold Schwarzenegger himself, although they didn’t truly portray Conan or his world in all its true gore and glory. Suffice it to say that there are more than enough resources out there to fill an MMO world, and many expansions to come. This is obviously a good thing for us, since this gives Funcom plenty of room to grow and also sets up guidelines and history for them to work into the game's design.

My impressions of the game were surprisingly positive, considering I was expecting to ridicule it pretty badly. I was not disappointed by the graphics or the audio tracks in the least. The audio actually sounds like something you’d expect to hear in a new Conan movie. The storytelling, the character voiceovers, and most definitely the visuals met my approval.

To expand a bit on the graphics, the game can be visually stunning if your system has the power to play on the highest settings. The flora, terrain, and objects in general were very well done. The character models are well rendered and extremely detailed. And yes, there are many character customization options available when you are initially creating your character in Age of Conan. The closest comparison I can make would be that the graphics remind me of Vanguard's visuals, but they are not as resource-heavy for whatever reason.

Speaking of graphics, what Age of Conan discussion or review can be complete without mention of it being a game intended for a mature audience? So what exactly do we get to see with the current ESRB rating of M, you may wonder? The answer is everything they had promised in the beginning -- RED blood, gore, heads flying off, spraying blood, cuss words, curvy hotties ... and did I mention nipples? There had been considerable controversy over this that went on for quite some time. Fortunately for us, Funcom went to bat for our "adult rights," and after going a couple extra innings in overtime, they managed to get all of those aspects of the game approved by the ESRB with that Mature 17+ rating. Go team Funcom!

The gameplay is very different from many of the MMOs that I have played. The combat system seems far more interactive than other titles, and your skill with the attacks, defenses, and combos were as important as your gear in many instances. Each class has its own particular style and set of combo moves, but in general all classes have to be actively monitoring combat and adjusting their strategies accordingly, or else they will get a nasty case of "dead." To put it simply, folks, this is not your typical "target mob, click auto-attack, go fetch cup of coffee and come back to find the mob dead" type of game. It does take some getting used to, but it is more than worth the learning curve time investment. Ah yes, the joy of seeing your very first severed head flying off of an opponent. Boo-yah!!

So Funcom took the challenge of bringing Conan’s world to life for our gaming pleasure. The real question, though, is whether they managed to create a playable game that did the legend of Conan justice. During my time with the beta, I was able to reach level 20 and found myself fully enjoying the game in that time period. Now my disclaimer is that the lower levels of any MMO are typically very refined and polished at the time of release, so I can only base my opinions on those first 20 levels; one can only hope that the other 60 are just as developed.

Now, being in beta comes with certain understood problems that I have purposefully left out of these impressions since they are not a true reflection of what the release version of the game will play like (i.e., numerous server resets, lag, frequent patches, etc.). So based solely upon gameplay, the interface, NPC interaction, and general playability, I am inclined to say that Funcom has done a good job of capturing the Conan legend and making it a fun MMO out of it.  Keep up the good work, Funcom, and learn from the mistakes of the various MMO blunders that we have seen in the recent years.

So it looks like Funcom are on the right track to delivering a solid and compelling experience within the Conan universe. In fact, my business partner was so interested in the game that he sat down and coded up a fansite, http://www.aocclasses.com, for it in a week, just so that he could get involved in the game.

Age of Conan is scheduled to hit stores on May 20, 2008 -- I look forward to seeing it on the shelves and joining in on all the carnage!


LAUNCH GALLERY (7 IMAGES)
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53 comments | showing # 1 to 50

Coonskin05's Avatar
Coonskin05 at 05/05/2008 17:40
Who the fuck is Shane Phelps?
Nick Chester's Avatar
Nick Chester at 05/05/2008 17:41
He's the guy that did the hands-on preview of Age of Conan.
bleep's Avatar
bleep at 05/05/2008 17:43
Go team Funcom!
Hamza CTZ Aziz's Avatar
Hamza CTZ Aziz at 05/05/2008 17:43
Read the byline at the end!

Lifebane is a Destructoid contributor and webmaster of AOCclasses.com, a fansite dedicated to Age of Conan.
Samit Sarkar's Avatar
Samit Sarkar at 05/05/2008 17:43
Touché, Mr. Chester. Anyway...“blood, gore, heads flying off, spraying blood, cuss words, curvy hotties -- and did I mention nipples?” Count me in!
power-glove's Avatar
power-glove at 05/05/2008 17:44
Lifebane is a Destructoid contributor and webmaster of AOCclasses.com, a fansite dedicated to Age of Conan.

It's pretty obvious who this guy is.
ChillyBilly's Avatar
ChillyBilly at 05/05/2008 17:44
So far i'm enjoying the beta, the combo system is definitely something that us old school MMO'ers are going to have to get used to. I think as long as Funcom pumps out additional content on a regular basis then Conan will be around for a good little bit.
Scape's Avatar
Scape at 05/05/2008 17:44
@coonskin
"Lifebane is a Destructoid contributor and webmaster of AOCclasses.com, a fansite dedicated to Age of Conan."
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps's Avatar
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps at 05/05/2008 17:45
damnit, I should have used smaller words. sorry :)
Professor Pew's Avatar
Professor Pew at 05/05/2008 17:46
Who the fuck is... ah!

It all sounds very sweet, maybe it's a good thing that there's no way in hell I'm gonna be able to run this game. I'm glad there's gonna be a big MMO that focuses on skill instead of just the amount of time you have.

And will it have bare nippled goldfarmers? G.I. 5 dollah!
king3vbo's Avatar
king3vbo at 05/05/2008 17:48
Who the fuck is Shane Phelps?

I dont care. Hes awesome
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps's Avatar
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps at 05/05/2008 17:48
Me farm you long time!
Scape's Avatar
Scape at 05/05/2008 17:49
Sorry I didn't read the two other comments saying the exact thing I did....
Coonskin05's Avatar
Coonskin05 at 05/05/2008 17:50
Goddamn a guy can't use a DToid meme around here anymore without getting reamed. :(
razerangel's Avatar
razerangel at 05/05/2008 17:50
Nipples you say? Im there!
Primo's Avatar
Primo at 05/05/2008 17:52
I thought he was an Olympian.
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps's Avatar
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps at 05/05/2008 17:53
no sweat there Coonskin05, reaming is also in the game! wowzer!
Colette Bennett's Avatar
Colette Bennett at 05/05/2008 17:53
Nice job Shane - this was a great read.
mix's Avatar
mix at 05/05/2008 17:55
Maybe, MMO's are not my cup of tea.
Big Z's Avatar
Big Z at 05/05/2008 18:00
Great write up Shane! I've got the collector's edition pre-ordered already. It comes with five buddy keys so some friends can give the game a shot, I may whip up some sort of contest or just plain give them away once I get the box, haven't quite decided yet.
Mxyzptlk's Avatar
Mxyzptlk at 05/05/2008 18:02
Oh hey, I remember you from your hands-on preview of Age of Conan. That was pretty cool.
bleep's Avatar
bleep at 05/05/2008 18:04
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps: reaming is also in the game!
NOW IN EXTRA WITTY FLAVOR!
Teta's Avatar
Teta at 05/05/2008 18:10
A MMO that needs a NASA machine to run is not my type of MMO.
Reeper's Avatar
Reeper at 05/05/2008 18:25
Wtf? I was just getting adjusted to the new Neiro guy or whatever, now we have -Lifebane-? I can't keep up.
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps's Avatar
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps at 05/05/2008 18:34
we are legion.....
DynamicSheep's Avatar
DynamicSheep at 05/05/2008 18:36
This is bullshit... you've got a relatively normal name, your avatar is not a self-portrait that is easily made fun of, and your first article was well written... how in the hell are we supposed to break you in?
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps's Avatar
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps at 05/05/2008 18:37
umm.... send me nude pics of niero?
Teen Idol's Avatar
Teen Idol at 05/05/2008 18:42
The monthly fee makes my penis get small..
adultswim810's Avatar
adultswim810 at 05/05/2008 18:57
sweet, ima get it for da nipples =P
matmanx1's Avatar
matmanx1 at 05/05/2008 19:01
Open beta has been much better than expected. I'm actually considering a purchase on this one. Go figure!
MissHinasaki's Avatar
MissHinasaki at 05/05/2008 20:44
I only came here to find out who Lifebane was...

And the rest of you probably did as well.
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps's Avatar
Shane -Lifebane- Phelps at 05/05/2008 20:51
who is Lifebane though? Oh wait.. that's us.. err me I mean.
DryvBy's Avatar
DryvBy at 05/05/2008 22:14
Note from TWB: Game does not look THAT good. Screen shots you see are doctored.
Niero's Avatar
Niero at 05/05/2008 22:17
We didn't take these screenshots; they were supplied with the fan kit. That's what the game is 'supposed to look like' when it's done and your computer rules, I guess.
Qraze's Avatar
Qraze at 05/05/2008 23:11
first you want to kill me, now you want to kiss me. i love the evil dead/ army of darkness movies.
007's Avatar
007 at 05/05/2008 23:16
Who the fuck is Niero and Lifebane?

AND JUICE?!
MechaMonkey's Avatar
MechaMonkey at 05/06/2008 00:02
Lifebane? More like... Nevermind, I got nothing.

Anyway, nips and decapitations FTW.
Electro Lemon's Avatar
Electro Lemon at 05/06/2008 00:05
Who the fuck is Li- oh, damn it Coon.
mistic's Avatar
mistic at 05/06/2008 00:45
i hope they create a free trial, I'd love to give it a try, but just not so inclined to pay a monthly fee...
TheGameCritic's Avatar
TheGameCritic at 05/06/2008 00:49
The game actually DOES look that good. Not doctored. I'm running it maxed out and it looks unbelievable. They did a really good job capturing the vibe of Hyboria.
flabzilla's Avatar
flabzilla at 05/06/2008 02:16
All sounds a bit shit and meh to me.
ScreamingScarab's Avatar
ScreamingScarab at 05/06/2008 06:24
I hope this comes out on 360 in September like the paper at the Gamestop says. I've been waiting to grind some lvls.
necrozen's Avatar
necrozen at 05/06/2008 08:02
Man I can't wait for this game. I'm not really into MMO stuff, but I like the comics, so I think I'm gonna like this as well.

Plus, lately my PC has been jealous of my Wii, and that is never good.
nademagnet's Avatar
nademagnet at 05/06/2008 08:21
[size=huge]GO TEAM FUNCOM![/size]
nademagnet's Avatar
nademagnet at 05/06/2008 08:21
[FAIL]DAMN IT![/FAIL]
Demtor's Avatar
Demtor at 05/06/2008 09:10
Warhammer will crush Conan like a leetle girly man >:-) Muwaha!

In all seriousness I would love it if this game AND Warhammer were successful because I appreciate the hard work and love they are so obviously putting in to this game. That and I HATE World of Warcraft so win win!
DryvBy's Avatar
DryvBy at 05/06/2008 09:54
No the game DOESN'T look that good. I'd post the screen shots but that's a violation of some gay EULA. This game will fail, like Conan did.
Lightthrower's Avatar
Lightthrower at 05/06/2008 10:41
Go Funcom! Go Anarchy Online! Go Conan!
Crunshii's Avatar
Crunshii at 05/06/2008 10:56
lol Shane Lifebane Phelps, you can start a whole family of evil sorcerers with that name. Cool stuff can't wait for Conan O' Brian Barbarian! also, registering right now @ aocclasses :D
desaturated's Avatar
desaturated at 05/06/2008 15:10
@Demtor, I doubt Waaagh is gonna touch Conan....seriously play both, then commment on them. AoC > Waaagh in practically every way.
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