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Hamza Bullets! Death Tank super tank 'shoop and haiku of death contest winners! photo

Oh, Hamza Bullets, what can't they do? I know that they can help to pick out the winners of the Death Tank super 'shoop and haiku of death contest that recently ended.

Sadly, the Hamza Bullets didn't win. Not because they aren't awesome (which they are), but because there were entries that had just a little bit more of what I was looking for, and even some things I hadn't even thought of.

Leave it up to the D'toid community to take me literally and use fish tanks, dunk tanks, Left 4 Dead tanks, and even Thomas the Tank Engine tanks in their entries. Kudos to you, folks. Kudos to you.

So, which entries won the free Death Tank codes? Follow up after the jump to see if your entry was one of the winning ten.  Also, since there were ten codes to give away, I split it up into the top five haiku, and the top five pictures.

These were judged by how much they made me laugh, inventiveness, creativity, and whether or not the entry followed the rules (mostly me laughing, though).

But, seriously, some of you may want to look up the definition of haiku. Just saying. 

Now, for no apparent reason whatsoever, the haiku winners go first!

Sup3rt3d: Star Wars is always good.

Oh Luke Skywalker
So near Death on Hoth but saved
By the Bacta Tank

hoodoo: Def Leppard reference!

Death becomes a game
As the tank rolls closer still
Armageddon it?

kittwalker: Wtf is a BBC Micro?

I used to play Tanks,
On my BBC Micro.
Death Tank looks better

portastad: Death Becomes Her was terrible. 

Death Becomes Her, yah
It was a box office tank
Straight to VHS 

drfoongoggles: I had to look up the syllable count in "towards."

Death rolling toward me
In shape of big, bad-ass tank
I soil trousers

And now for the Photoshop winners!

Electro Lemon: What the fuck is this blue shit?!

 

Eques-Ardor: It's how he rolls.

the GAMEGOBLIN: Baby tank of death!

 

sirjester: Although you don't get the haiku thing, Bill and Ted's Death is win.  

MechaMonkey: That fish is fucked!

 

Those are the winners, folks! Please don't be too upset if you didn't get one of the codes, it was hard enough deciding on the winners as it was. Special nod to Wedge's shark tank 'shoop ... I wish you had put Death in it, but them's the rules! 

Email me at dyson@destructoid.com to claim your prizes. Also, please use the same email you use to make your account, so we can verify that you are you. There some sneaky people on the Internet, and those bastards don't deserve the awesome of Death Tank.

Great job to everyone that entered! 






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22 comments | showing # 1 to 22
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Atlas's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 00:13
Atlas
I am going to cry now. Did my poor entry even elicit a chuckle?
fromagex's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 00:19
fromagex
i'm glad superted won
skull13666's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 00:40
skull13666
-dies with cries- i wanted one cause im poor and tired of bummin games off friends, ALSO the castlevania one should have won
Dyson's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 00:54
Dyson
Atlas, your entry didn't have Death in the picture :(

Rules be rules.
MechaMonkey's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 01:30
MechaMonkey
Hooray! Thanks Dyson!

I'ma blow some shit up.
Wedge's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 04:25
Wedge
You know I put another one up that had death in it just because of that, right? Also since when does death literally have to be some visage of the Grim Reaper?

Oh well, my 360 will continue to be barely used.
Wedge's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 04:27
Wedge
Also I liked Death Becomes Her. When I was 7. I will probably not go back and check why.
Sup3rt3d's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 05:49
Sup3rt3d
Ah sweet! I <3 Destructoid for shit like this, cheers Dyson
Maurice Tan's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 06:12
Maurice Tan
I'm so happy that someone used the Bill & Ted/Det Sjunde Inseglet Death guy, because I was too lazy to do it :D
RonBurgandy2010's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 06:20
RonBurgandy2010
I like MechaMonkey's shoop. That haiku is awesome.
ME4Twaffle's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 07:47
ME4Twaffle
SW33T! B]
the GAMEGOBLIN's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 08:28
the GAMEGOBLIN
Haha, awesome
Andrew Godsey's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 08:30
Andrew Godsey
Station!
Jesus H Christ's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 08:41
Jesus H Christ
Aw and I was so proud of my Norse mini-epic.

Congratulations, winnarz.
coffeesash's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 08:43
coffeesash
I had no idea this was even on ;_;
drfoongoggles's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 08:49
drfoongoggles
Whoa. I had no idea. :] I was in history class when I found out and I shouted out when I read. Nice job, Dyson. You caused many cock-eyed glares from my classmates.

I've never won anything on here before, so pardon my ignorance, but do you email us the codes, or are they messaged to us on the D-Toid community thing?
drfoongoggles's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 09:09
drfoongoggles
Oh wait. Silly me.
portastad's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 11:23
portastad
Ha ha. Thanks, Dyson. I had a feeling that awful movie was winning material. For some reason I'd still watch it again though... ???
hoodoo's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 12:02
hoodoo
Woo hoo! I win. Thanks.
Chronic Logic's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 15:58
Chronic Logic
Whoopdeedoo.
NinjaGoesWhaa's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/04/2009 17:05
NinjaGoesWhaa
Awwww, so close to a code. What about if I bribe you with Nachos? Whatabout 5 different kinds of nachos?!

Ask not for whom the Hamza bullets toll - they toll for thee!
Holyetheline's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/05/2009 13:01
Holyetheline
fuck i lose
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