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Go into a vagina for the first time in this Xbox 360 game photo

A game called Privates has you controling a gang of condom-topped marines that dive into vaginas and asses to blast out the "oozy, shouty monsters." Zombie Cow Studio is really making this Xbox 360 twin-stick shooter. Don't believe me? This comes directly from the press release:

Britain. Land of Hope and Glory-holes. Where pregnant, waddling teenagers take up the full width of the pavement with their oversized triplet pushchairs, unaware that their rampant, perpetual humping has filled them to the brim with all manner of grotty infections.

There's five levels of...exploration and funk fighting in this game that will release on PC this summer for free, and then follow on the Xbox 360 for "a bit of money."

Dan Marshall, founder of Zombie Cow Studios: “We’re exploring some pretty unique gaming environments and themes… I can honestly say I can’t imagine you’ve ever played anything quite like it. These first five screenshots should give you a pretty good idea of what we’re up to, but there’s a hell of a lot more to come soon.”

This is a thing that is really happening! Gotta love the above screenshot.

Sorry about the vagina comment in the headline.

LAUNCH GALLERY (5 IMAGES)
Photo Photo Photo Photo Photo









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Dale North is Destructoid's Editor-In-Chief, a founding editor, and specialist in Japanese gaming. An accomplished musician, Dale was reporting from Japan during the earthquakes of 2011. Luckily, he got the fuck out alive and is home in America now with his wife and beloved corgi, Einstein. Dale is also a co-founder of Destructoid's sister anime site Japanator. Likes Corgis, Sega Saturn, PSP, iPhone, Photographic tools. Meet the rest of the team



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72 comments | showing # 1 to 50
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next 50 comments

HEL105's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:02
HEL105
...
infinity's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:04
infinity
i concur with the first comment.
bluemeep's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:05
bluemeep
Oh, for fuck's sake... This is going to end in Controversy, isn't it?
superjay779's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:05
superjay779
LOL PSN please.
VolksONER's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:05
VolksONER
Today's word is VAGINA!!! Spread the word.
Pudge Controls the Weather's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:05
Pudge Controls the Weather
The world is a better place now this exists.
Los255's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:09
Los255
WE HAVE FOUND GAMING'S CITIZEN KANE
fanbanta1's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:11
fanbanta1
lol
Rammstein's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:13
Rammstein
I.. This.. Words, I lack them. I don't know whether to rage or rofl.
Nyktharas's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:15
Nyktharas
Talk about a fail way to try and market to teenagers...... wow.

Way to go MS for approving this complete trash.
MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:16
MrSadistic
Free for the PC? Wow, I do believe that this will be the first time I've been inside a vagina without paying for anything.
Kalmah's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:17
Kalmah
Obligatory GOTF
SKSith's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:17
SKSith
Wait........ What?
partyvan's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:18
partyvan
Xbox 360 -- JUMP IN
Monodi's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:20
Monodi
Yes. Ok. What.
StepTangent's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:20
StepTangent
I don't know about the rest of you, but this won't be the first time for me.
Neroisonfire's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:21
Neroisonfire
Lol... Am I the only one hoping for co-op?
Xzyliac's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:21
Xzyliac
One person in these comments hates fun. Can you spot the fun hating commenter?
Mr Andy Dixon's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:21
Mr Andy Dixon
I'm gonna buy the shit out of this game. (And then I'm gonna fuck it.)
VinceNotVance's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:22
VinceNotVance
The fuck is this?

Also, it seems like I still can't get into a vagina without paying "a bit of money" first.
NotoriousBIG420's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:27
NotoriousBIG420
If I played this game, would this be considered being unfaithful to my wife?
bobyoko's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:27
bobyoko
that's disgusting, way to keep it classy,guys.
SKSith's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:27
SKSith
There is an iPhone game called Mr. Cond... about condoms...
Ramalho's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:29
Ramalho
Is the final boss the penis head?
MooImaChicken's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:29
MooImaChicken
Vaginas are overrated...
Occams electric toothbrush's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:30
Occams electric toothbrush
Susan B. Anthony approves.
AwesomeExMachina's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:30
AwesomeExMachina
This game could only be better if two of the characters formed a love connection and had a sex scene while inside the vagina.
WarZombie's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:30
WarZombie
YES.
Shane Gill's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:31
Shane Gill
" partyvan
Xbox 360 -- JUMP IN"

Give this guy a medal.
Cartman's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:31
Cartman
i dont get it
Springsteen's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:36
Springsteen
IS there a time limit for each level? I'd love it to have a time limit. GIMME TIME LIMIT!

You can even have different outcomes depending on WHERE you are. Oh, the possibilities!
Los255's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:36
Los255
If I played this game, would this be considered being unfaithful to my wife?

Well, if there is some form of multiplayer, enjoy your threesome.
NotoriousBIG420's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:42
NotoriousBIG420
I hope it has co-op and the choices could be:

1-player (Single and Ready to Mingle!)
2-players (Missionaries!)
3-players (Manag e tua!)
4-players (Orgy Time!)
Everyday Legend's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:43
Everyday Legend
Ultra Controversy Finish.
Rhuno's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:44
Rhuno
They totally stole my idea. :(
matty125's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:46
matty125
Didn't The Simpsons already thought of this idea?
Handy's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 13:55
Handy
I think the Catholic Church would technically have to oppose this game.
Jon McGuire's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:00
Jon McGuire
HAHAHAHAHAHA
13thDragon's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:04
13thDragon
Giggity. Alriiiiight.
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:04
Elsa
... and does the game winner have to pay child support??
Canthari's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:15
Canthari
@StepTangent

Not your first time into a virtual vagina? -lucky dude.
Daxelman's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:18
Daxelman
...
smurfee mcgee's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:22
smurfee mcgee
I came.
I shouldn't have.
Killrig's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:35
Killrig
Rad.
qlum's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:39
qlum
I will play it because its free
ndschroede23's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:44
ndschroede23
@AwesomeExMachina

There's an Xzibit joke in there somewhere.
Pwnstar117's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:44
Pwnstar117
Do I play with my penis?
Darren Nakamura's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/11/2010 14:52
Darren Nakamura
I'm digging the stylized pubes. And that may be the first time that sentence has ever been written.
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