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Fun for the whole family: Cornholing comes to the Wii photo

A popular college pastime will soon come to video game consoles.

Thus begins The Lantern's article on Incredible Technologies' game version of Ohio's noble pastime of "cornholing". Armed with only a vague knowledge of the strange rituals conducted by the denizens of middle(ish) America and a widely accepted definition for cornholing, I expected a whole different ball game.

Sadly, Nintendo isn't abandoning its trend of family-friendly shovelware for the Wii in favor of horrible deviant-friendly shovelware. Instead of a game in which the Wiimote is put to nauseating use, Incredible Technologies is releasing Target Toss Pro: BAGS, which, in spite of its potentially questionable title, has nothing to do with forced penetration, corn-based or otherwise. 

Answering the questions nobody asked, Andy Kniaz, executive director of Incredible Technologies, explained why they were making a game about throwing a bag of corn through a hole, "Our designers basically realized there's no reason why you couldn't really make a video game of it." An astute observation to be sure, but one that doesn't address why you wouldn't "make a video game of it."

Aside from the endlessly entertaining "throw the object through the hole" gameplay Target Toss Pro: BAGS brings to the table, it will also reportedly feature "Vegas BAGS" mode, in which players are given a card out of a 52-card deck for every shot made attempting to construct the best poker-hand possible. It's worth noting that "Vegas BAGS" is also a term with two very dissimilar meanings, and one which I would heartily advise you refrain from using should you find yourself in negotiations with a Vegas hooker.

[Thanks, Jonathan!]


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39 comments | showing # 1 to 39

MrSadistic's Avatar
MrSadistic at 05/14/2008 19:48
what
rhk's Avatar
rhk at 05/14/2008 19:48
huh?
Scary Womanizing Pig Mask's Avatar
Scary Womanizing Pig Mask at 05/14/2008 19:49
I was hoping that cornholing would be a euphemism for something else :(
Electro Lemon's Avatar
Electro Lemon at 05/14/2008 19:51
In before "I'll show you a cornhole..."
DonWii's Avatar
DonWii at 05/14/2008 19:53
I thought this was announced for WiiWare...
Joe Burling's Avatar
Joe Burling at 05/14/2008 19:55
Cornhole in Cincinnati
The west side of Cincinnati has been widely accepted as the birthplace of Cornhole.[citation needed] The first games were played in the early '60s and dubbed "cornhole" due to the bag's feed corn stuffing.

Cornhole is popular around Cincinnati and is played during family activities, like picnics, during tailgating, and other social events.
Joe Burling's Avatar
Joe Burling at 05/14/2008 19:59
Speaking of Cincinnati...
ArrestedDeveloper's Avatar
ArrestedDeveloper at 05/14/2008 20:05
Everybody's laughing and riding and cornholing except Buster.
tratch's Avatar
tratch at 05/14/2008 20:06
Everyone's laughing and riding and cornholing except Buster.
tratch's Avatar
tratch at 05/14/2008 20:07
Oh shit, jinx.
MaxVest's Avatar
MaxVest at 05/14/2008 20:11
And then they proceeded to make a game about salad tossing, because chefs around the world enjoy this healthy, family-friendly pastime.
parrothead's Avatar
parrothead at 05/14/2008 20:13
I actually love this game, but I cannot see how it would be fun for very long on a video game. There is a bar that I go to here, that has the game and I have to say that I get bored after about half an hour. Oh wait, that is like every other Wii game that is no Mario Galaxy or Zelda. So I guess this works.
c0dek's Avatar
c0dek at 05/14/2008 20:20
sure, they'll make THIS, but they won't take me up on my "fling poo like a monkey" concept. whatever.
Sharpless's Avatar
Sharpless at 05/14/2008 20:20
Niero's Avatar
Niero at 05/14/2008 20:23
I want a Wii game where I clean the back of ceiling fans. Can someone make this happen?
Eschatos's Avatar
Eschatos at 05/14/2008 20:26
Why the fuck would anyone want to play this?
Wexx's Avatar
Wexx at 05/14/2008 20:26
Ugh.......
Mxyzptlk's Avatar
Mxyzptlk at 05/14/2008 20:39
Gaybear is going to be really disappointed...
Magesx's Avatar
Magesx at 05/14/2008 21:06
SHOVELWARE
Professor Pew's Avatar
Professor Pew at 05/14/2008 21:17
Is there gonna be a Cornholio outfit?
Alexradl's Avatar
Alexradl at 05/14/2008 21:31
Don't worry. Mama will fix it.
OhJAM's Avatar
OhJAM at 05/14/2008 21:38
Yes, you too can now enjoy the thrill of virtual conrnholing, along with other popular backwoods events like the County Line Moonshine Run, the 800-meter Sibling Rape and my personal favorite, Wife-in-Bondage Boxing. Good times for all, the Arkansas way!
Tubatic's Avatar
Tubatic at 05/14/2008 22:14
jerrt's Avatar
jerrt at 05/14/2008 22:22
when is someone going to tell the rest of the world that corn hole used to mean something completely different. go and look on urban dictionary which definition is rated higher.
cannonball's Avatar
cannonball at 05/14/2008 22:23
so....cornhole gets a Wii game before disc golf does....fail
NihonTiger90's Avatar
NihonTiger90 at 05/14/2008 22:42
I graduated college. I'm supposed to be away from this shit.
cbre88x's Avatar
cbre88x at 05/14/2008 22:52
Ironic, I was actually introduced to this game while I was camping all night at a Best Buy to get a Wii. It's actually pretty fun, but a Wii game? Really?

For Shame.
Rifter01's Avatar
Rifter01 at 05/14/2008 22:55
@TUBATIC .. I love that Bevis reference..

But seriously.. It is stuff like that game that is turning the Wii into almost a complete novelty as far as disc based games go.. I find it strange that while the Wii has alot of potential, it is largly ignored. :o/ Oh well, maybe someday I make a gr8 WiiWare title and show 'em how its done. Ten Dollar! Ten Dollar!
sweetchuck's Avatar
sweetchuck at 05/14/2008 23:20
I love cornholing as much as the next guy (seriously, I'm a UC grad), but I just don't see the point of this. Granted, I said the same thing about Cooking Momma, and numerous other titles.
WastelandTraveler's Avatar
WastelandTraveler at 05/14/2008 23:23
oi :( the real thing is oh so much more enjoying. the pub that I go to has this game set up outside, along with ping pong.

This game = enjoyable in real life, while drunk. Not on wii in room ;(
Paul Soth's Avatar
Paul Soth at 05/15/2008 01:07
As part of the tradition at OSU, this then leads to more drinking, then couches and dumpsters being set on fire, cars flipped over, and general mayhem all around.

I know. I've lived in this town for 28 years.
gotdurnrite's Avatar
gotdurnrite at 05/15/2008 06:55
Where's the Cleveland Steamer game where you play as a captain trying to make it as driver in the corrupt world of steamboat racing in Lake Erie.
Char Aznable's Avatar
Char Aznable at 05/15/2008 07:27
Incredible Technologies deserves to go bankrupt for this. Fuck Golden Tee.
ToeKing's Avatar
ToeKing at 05/15/2008 09:04
@cannonball
Disc golf is one of the mini games in the monkey ball game... it's not too much fun to play though :(
SWE3tMadness's Avatar
SWE3tMadness at 05/15/2008 09:43
Jesus christ, just how hard is it to actually go out and play it in real life? My friends and I rigged up a cornhole set with old cardboard and beanbags. Far cheaper than buying this crap, and almost certainly a hell of a lot more fun.
NSNick's Avatar
NSNick at 05/15/2008 11:34
The Lantern got quoted somewhere. Man, that paper sucks.
welkstar's Avatar
welkstar at 05/15/2008 12:06
I've seen the cornhole arcade cab, so this isn't a total shock. I'm really more surprised by OSU's crappy paper getting a quote than on the game. I go to OSU and I hardly ever read that junk. My boss and I got a good laugh outta this.
Blackhat's Avatar
Blackhat at 05/15/2008 21:48
"Ironic, I was actually introduced to this game while I was camping all night at a Best Buy to get a Wii."

That isn't irony. In fact, it's the opposite of irony. Sorry this stuff bugs me.

As to the story, I see this shit, and I get scared. Are we really so devoid of ideas that this is being made for the Wii? Come on.
Necros's Avatar
Necros at 05/16/2008 23:51
...seriously?
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