[Editor's note: jackal27 writes about how much he hates the Water Temple for his Monthly Musing. -- CTZ]
As I tried to think of something to write about for this article, a good many things crossed my mind, possibly things that I'll write articles about later on. However, the majority of the things I thought about were annoyances rather than things I hated. Things like friend codes, XBox Live, Zelda: Twilight Princess, every Final Fantasy game after 9, etc. Then, it hit me: The Water Temple.
There was only one problem with writing an article about this: trying to keep the swearing to a minimal. It's a risk I'm willing to take! Let's get at it!
Where the hell do I begin!? Here I am, a 10-year-old boy who's been experiencing what I considered to be the greatest adventure ever, The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time. There were so many secrets and wondrous things to discover that I literally thought that somehow the game had to be magical. This game could do no wrong. I had already been blown away by the big twist that Link gets locked away for seven years, scared to death by the Forest Temple and the dirty feeling that I got from having the life humped out of me by zombies. Then there was the fact that I had triumphed over a huge dragon in the middle of a volcano by smashing it's head with a FREAKING HAMMER! What could possibly top it?
God ... Oh God ... I had no idea what I was in for. I conquered the small Ice Temple and received the Iron Boots. Then I was given a Blue Tunic, which I thought was so awesome at the time, and off I went to the Water Temple! What mysterious item could await me!? What deadly creatures would I face off against!? All these questions and more would soon be answered.
As I entered, my brother and I quickly realized what the gimmick would be for this dungeon: raise the water, lower the water, and then raise it again. Simple enough, right? WRONG. DEAD WRONG. It also quickly became apparent that we would be entering and exiting the menu a lot to change in and out of the Iron Boots. Not only that, but when the Iron boots were on, Link walked SO SLOW.
HURRY UP!
How about the damn Tektites that waited on top of the water for you to try and climb up to nearest ledge, only HEADBUTT YOUR ASS BACK INTO THE WATER!!
I SEE YOU OVER THERE DAMMIT!
Oh man, but maybe the item will still be cool! Maybe?
WRONG KID! All you get is a longer Hookshot!! MWUHAHAHA!!
UP YOURS!
Oh yeah, remember that annoying little tramp Ruto that you had to drag around all through Jabu Jabu's belly? She's here too! Oh, and by the way, she wants to have your children!
DEAR GOD.
Give me a freaking break. I can't remember how long it took me to beat this place as a kid, but I remember my brother and I switched off constantly for days looking for just ONE switch and it turned out to be hidden underneath one of the platforms that floats up when the water rises. That would probably be fine if you could SEE IT FROM WHERE YOU'RE STANDING. But you can't! They just expect you to say "Hmmm... I wonder if there's a switch under this platform."
FAIL.
Oh and the boss? Don't even get me freaking started on the undulating tentacle of skeet that is Morpha.
BALLS.
The only cool part about this dungeon? The battle with Dark Link, and even that's flawed! I mean come on guys, we all know Dark Link is cool and his entrance was totally creepy, but for a kid, he was nearly as hard as the dungeon itself. Also, if you die when you're fighting him, he is BITCH to get back to.
STOP COUNTERING EVERYTHING!
You know what, I try to watch my language but FUCK THIS DUNGEON.
RIGHT IN THE EAR!
Contest:
6:22 PM on 09.09.2008
| 
I bought the thing and played through the first Zelda, then a few days later I started on Ocarina. I thoroughly enjoyed the game, up until I got to this damn water temple. It infuriated me so much, that I just quit playing the thing. I have never quit playing through a Zelda game in the history of all Zelda games!!
It still haunts me at night. "One day water temple!!"
Also, you need to come out and play video games with me and Addison. JOMO FnF! :D
However the boot problem was solved as easy as assigning it to a C-Button if I remember correctly. Then you didn't have to go into the start menu you just put them on and off. It was a very challenging temple which I didn't really find any of the others to be so I can't hate it too much as it did increase the play time and make me think.
"Oh yeah, the fuckin' Water Temple!"
It was just horrible!
As for the iron boots, try equipping them before a cutscene to hear Link stomp around. I didn't mind going to the pause screen so I'd take them off when I was underwater to swim faster, then put them back on to sink, etc, think you save time this way. *looks for OOT speedrun*
OH GOD. I know. I replay this game annually and that happens every time. EVERY. TIME.
Side note: The Dark Link battle is probably one of the most interesting scenes of that entire generation. Just sayin'.
1. first attack - blocked by sword
2. second attack - blocked by sword
(stop and look in menu for a minute... ah, there's my giant hammer)
3. dark link gets his ass kicked
But yea, this dungeon sucked BALLS my first time through, took me about 12 hours.
I never beat the Water Temple.
I had to get a friend to do it for me, maybe one day I'll be good enough at this gaming lark to go back and complete it myself. Then I'll be able to die a happy man.
OOT's water temple and MM's every temple backlash.
PEOPLE LIKE YOU KILLED MY ZELDA
Also, Dark Link cried like a little bitch when I whipped out my hammer. I'll have none of that standing on my sword bullshit.
I put the game down for a day or two (a very strong act considering my otherwise potent love of OoT) and came back to it with 'just fucking get it over with and move on' determination later in the week, got that ship back on course and continued to be amazed by the rest of the game.
Water temple was the worst part of a great game - if it had been a dungeon in a less-amazing game, then it wouldn't be as big of a deal, but in OoT it was like DaVinci dragging his sleave across still wet paint on the Mona Lisa - an objectively small blemish that marred a masterpiece.
Alas, they tried to make another mind boggler out of the water dungeon in twilight princess, but that will only fade into obscurity like that entire game.
But as much as it sucked, the water temple refused to let go of me. I HAD to keep playing till I got the heck out of there!
In fact I'm going to go as far as to attribute Ocarina of Time (and the water temple specifically) to helping me develop patience and problem solving logic at an early age.
I've been rather shocked to hear that level get such a bad rap since. Maybe it was because you were ten? Although the younger I've been, the more patience I've had. Your diet growing up wasn't sugar water was it? :P
I remember refusing to turn the game off to sleep because it would ruin the momentum I was building in the temple, and I didn't want to start over from the entrance. Took me a couple hours but the sense of accomplishment made it all worthwhile.
Fuck the water temple