Note: iOS 9 + Facebook users w/ trouble scrolling: #super sorry# we hope to fix it asap. In the meantime Chrome Mobile is a reach around
hot  /  reviews  /  videos  /  cblogs  /  qposts

Fallout 3 rewards you for 'pulverizing women', claims critic

11:40 AM on 05.20.2009 // Jim Sterling
  @JimSterling

God-fearing Web site Every Day Christian has today published a handy little guide for idiotic parents, giving family-focused videogame critic Bob Waliszewski's thumbs-up and thumbs-down on a variety of videogames. Now parents will be able to know which games are suitable for their little cherubs, because Lord knows they can't be expected to think for themselves. Let's take a look at what Bob had to say!

Strangely enough, war-themed videogames are A-OK by Waliszewski's standards, endorsing both Empire: Total War and Tom Clancy's H.A.W.X as completely child-safe games. The lack of blood makes Total War fine, because apparently violence is acceptable if you don't see any red. Wii Music and LittleBigPlanet also score big with Bob. 

Naturally, Grand Theft Auto gets a thumbs down, with Chinatown Wars criticized for allowing gamers "to rip the heart of a person in graphic fashion, be exposed to detailed information and glorification of drugs, and the liberal use of cuss words."

It is Fallout 3, however, that has the best summary of all. According to Bob, there is no opportunity for the player to make compassionate choices, instead only choosing to reward players for "pulverizing women and leveling cities with atomic weaponry. It includes upper levels where cannibalism is part of the game." There is no talk of the karma system or ability to save cities from the aforementioned atomic weaponry. Apparently Bob only takes notice when cannibalism's mentioned. He must have a keen interest. 

Resident Evil 5 and MadWorld also come under fire, but frankly if you need an online Web guide to find out if any of these games are bad for children, then you are officially a complete moron. The article itself makes excuses for incompetent parents (oh they work so hard, they can't understand game ratings), but it's really not that difficult to work out that a game called Resident Evil may not be suitable for your snot-filled little brat.



Jim Sterling, Former Reviews Editor
 Follow Blog + disclosure JimSterling Tips
Destructoid reviews editor, responsible for running and maintaining the cutting edge videogame critique that people ignore because all they want to see are the scores at the end. Also a regular f... more   |   staff directory



 Setup email comments

Unsavory comments? Please report harassment, spam, and hate speech to our community fisters, and flag the user (we will ban users dishing bad karma). Can't see comments? Apps like Avast or browser extensions can cause it. You can fix it by adding *.disqus.com to your whitelists.

 Quickposts
Status updates from C-bloggers

Gamemaniac3434 avatarGamemaniac3434
It just occured to me that given the 99% probablility of there being an update pack to XCOM 2-ala Enemy Within-waiting for a while may be a better option, so that when I do get the game I get it in its optimal form-and on sale, to bring it below 90 total
Dr Mel avatarDr Mel
My mustache froze while walking home from work. Fun!
Sir Shenanigans avatarSir Shenanigans
I've discovered Fangamer... This stuff's amazing!
Jed Whitaker avatarJed Whitaker
No comment.
Parismio avatarParismio
Omg i love the internet
Mike Martin avatarMike Martin
Iron Paladin avatarIron Paladin
Jed Whitaker avatarJed Whitaker
I can't wait to mute Niero. #NoRules #ThePurge
Joe Parlock avatarJoe Parlock
I spent all last night playing Day of Defeat: Source. If only Valve gave it even half the attention it did to TF2 or CS:S...
BaronVonSnakPak avatarBaronVonSnakPak
Nearing Platinum status.
CoilWhine avatarCoilWhine
THIS IS THE BEST EMAIL I'VE EVER GOTTEN HOLY SHIT
Parismio avatarParismio
Sheesh i played metal gear rising before and Platinum ruined the franchise.
Fuzunga avatarFuzunga
Toonami is running a poll right now at [url]www.toonami.com/poll[/url] where one of the questions is which show you'd want un-cancelled. Oh, Teen Titans is included? That's curious...
SlyTAdvantage avatarSlyTAdvantage
"The Ravagers dropped the giant insects and waited for them to evolve ... it's clear. This is their plan from the start" -EDF 4.1 scientist So dragons are evolved forms of ants, spiders and/or wasps ....... what?
Ckarasu avatarCkarasu
Every time I hear "I don't understand why people like _____ game", I get annoyed. Of course you understand, if you've listened to what those people were saying. You just don't agree, and that's A-OK. I HATE Twilight, but I understand why people like it.
RadicalYoseph avatarRadicalYoseph
Just tried playing the first Bayonetta game... it was really bad. Honestly I don't understand why Platinum games are so well regarded. None of them are really worthwhile.
StriderHoang avatarStriderHoang
The first person I block is the person who talks shit about Platinum
Torchman avatarTorchman
Even though your waifus are shit
Darth Wachen avatarDarth Wachen
Finally, a blog that I can call my own, I feel accomplished somehow.
Nekrosys avatarNekrosys
Gonna be honest; this really made my day.
more quickposts


Contest!


Seriously

Invert site colors

  Dark Theme
  Light Theme


Destructoid means family.
Living the dream, since 2006

Pssst. konami code + enter

modernmethod logo



Back to Top


We follow moms on   Facebook  and   Twitter
  Light Theme      Dark Theme
Pssst. Konami Code + Enter!
You may remix stuff our site under creative commons w/@
- Destructoid means family. Living the dream, since 2006 -