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ESRB: Super Street Fighter IV has 'flexed gluteus' photo

Time for yet another hilarious ESRB rating. This time, Super Street Fighter IV has been submitted for approval, and North America's ratings board has yet again written a brilliant summary of the game, focusing needlessly on perceived sexual content with amusing consequences.

What I love about these summaries is that they look like sixteenth century puritans wrote them. I know that's not the ESRB's intent, but the attempts to appear clinical and unbiased makes the whole thing sound funnier. It also gives rise to brilliant phrases like "flexed gluteus." Check out the ESRB's sexy content selection:

Some of the female fighters' outfits are form-fitting and accentuate their breasts and buttocks; before battle, the camera occasionally zooms-out from close-up views of flexed gluteus. One of the fight stages occurs in a distillery with equipment used for brewing and wooden casks labeled "Scotch-Whisky." The expletives "damn" and "hell" can be heard in the dialogue.

Absolute genius. I hereby decree that "flexed gluteus" shall be the official words of my family, house and lords bannerman. It shall be inscribed on my coat of arms. Ad Honerem Flexed Gluteus. In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Flexed Gluteus. I'm going to say it again, just for kicks: Flexed Gluteus!

Full rating after the jump.

Platform: PlayStation 3, Xbox 360

Rating: Teen

Content descriptors: Alcohol Reference, Mild Language, Suggestive Themes, Violence

Rating summary:

This is an arcade-style fighting game in which players engage in one-on-one combat with a large international cast of human characters. Players mostly kick, punch, and use special abilities (e.g., fireballs, flying moves, and electrical strikes) to drain the opposing player's life meter. Special moves (ultra combos and super combos) are displayed in animated sequences in which characters react to being punched, kicked, or stomped on. Some of the female fighters' outfits are form-fitting and accentuate their breasts and buttocks; before battle, the camera occasionally zooms-out from close-up views of flexed gluteus. One of the fight stages occurs in a distillery with equipment used for brewing and wooden casks labeled "Scotch-Whisky." The expletives "damn" and "hell" can be heard in the dialogue.








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51 comments | showing # 1 to 50
prev next 50 comments

KingSigy's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 11:54
KingSigy
Sure. Why not, ESRB? Because I've used gluteus in a sentence in the last 21 years of my life.
CrocBox's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 11:58
CrocBox
You everyone doesn't speak like this?
Jumbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:00
Jumbo
Flex Gluteus needs to be a new hidden character.
DJDuffy 's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:02
DJDuffy
I'll flex your gluteus! Seriously though, ESRB? My spell check can't even find gluteus as a real word, although I'm sure you're making "cool slang" of gluteus-maximus.
BalloonFighter's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:07
BalloonFighter
That Cammie has a nice gluteus. Am I right fellas? sigh
CrocBox's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:08
CrocBox
Flex Gluteus sounds like something that would follow names like Bold Bigflank and Punch Rockgroin.
Mooshywooshy's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:10
Mooshywooshy
Well it must be pretty accurate since it gives me suggestive thoughts when I see the suggestive gluteus
Anonymouse's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:11
Anonymouse
I'd flex HER gluteus.
Paviel's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:11
Paviel
"It shall be inscribed on my coat of arms. Ad Honerem Flexed Gluteus."

I usually wouldn't care about Pig Latin, but this is VERY easy to turn into proper Latin: Ad Honorem Flecti Glutei. Literally, to the honor of the flexed gluteus.
Xzyliac's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:14
Xzyliac
@CrocBox
I lul'd hardcore.
Mr Wrighty 987's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:16
Mr Wrighty 987
Flexed Gluteus.
KrazyKraut's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:21
KrazyKraut
damn....gluteus.. learned a new word today
VGFreak1225's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:28
VGFreak1225
Wasn't Flexed Gluteus the Roman warrior who defeated Hairliess Dongicus?
Brian Szabelski's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:29
Brian Szabelski
I love that ass so much.
Joseph Leray's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:49
Joseph Leray
In nomine Patris, et Fili, et Glutei Sancti. Hymen.
aZZmodan's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:50
aZZmodan
Ohhh... I had an instant boner with which I bumped my desk and knocked two beer bottles to the floor waking up my dog that was sleeping in the adjacent room in the process... More please...
aZZmodan's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:54
aZZmodan
Also, what Joseph said...
aZZmodan's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 12:58
aZZmodan
Also, for those wondering, "gluteus" is actually a word, derived form the Greek "gloutoi" meaning, well... butt-cheeks... No, really...
Diverse's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 13:01
Diverse
I want Cammy to sit on my face and flex her ass muscles.
Reeper's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 13:37
Reeper
@ Diverse: I lol'd
Anastu's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 13:43
Anastu
@CrocBox Don't forget Big McLargeHuge

Do we have soccer moms running the ESRB now?
sleepingagain's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 14:00
sleepingagain
Cammys ass is NSFW
Pic0o's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 14:02
Pic0o
*awaits the day I see 'Panty Drop' in an ESRB description*
Emrah's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 14:03
Emrah
Nice angle.
Niero's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 14:10
Niero
we should make that a new tag on Destructoid
aZZmodan's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 14:30
aZZmodan
"we should make that a new tag on Destructoid" I second that...!
VGFreak1225's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 14:34
VGFreak1225
@Niero, aZZmodan:
Third that!
TurboHyperFighting's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 14:41
TurboHyperFighting
What an unflexed gluteus might look like:

aZZmodan's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 14:48
aZZmodan
@Turbo...: I think I can live with that... 8D
RAB's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 14:56
RAB
yes, yes, this is delicious.
readbigwordsisgood's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 15:02
readbigwordsisgood
@TurboHyperFighting

if that is not included under 'Nsfw' what is?

i thought Saturday and Sunday was fair game, but today is Tuesday.
Animated Toupee's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 15:07
Animated Toupee
These two Cammie pics may have enticed me to buy SSF4.

Errr... I mean ... the one ... in-game... Cammie pic. Just the one. Right.
TheTruth's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 15:15
TheTruth
Are the words damn and hell uttered while the flexed gluteus was zoomed in on?
QJD's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 15:20
QJD
Ooh!Ooh! I wnana say it too!

Flexed Gluteous.

Yaaay!
whatthi's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 15:27
whatthi
sorry cant understand what youre trying to say Jim im zooming in on Cammy's flexed glueteus...

dang!!even my PC cant understand what glueteus means in the spelling correction, are they still using 11th century dictionary?

someone fetch my whale oil lamp
whatthi's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 15:31
whatthi
nice Cammy pic btw TurboHyperFighting..

my Homo just got an Erectus
moominsean's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 15:45
moominsean
i think the ESRB website should have an ESRB rating of M for its lewd descriptions of video game content and excessive use of expletives.
RAB's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 15:50
RAB
seriously. I got a boner just reading that description.
TurboHyperFighting's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 16:50
TurboHyperFighting
@realbigword:

I don't see any genitalia exposed, do you? No more than the in-game pic jimmles posted.

Go read your bible.
atastysammich's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 17:33
atastysammich
I'd flex Cammy's gluteus, if you know what I mean.
j3tbl4ck's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 17:38
j3tbl4ck
LMFAO!

*pause*

LOL

they say 'damn' too?

GOTY.
Doobles's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 17:54
Doobles
Hmm, how old is the girl in that pic? Not that I'm complaining mind you...
Wedge's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 21:01
Wedge
Wait, this is already being submitted for ESRB approval?
taiki's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 21:21
taiki
@Doobles she's nearly 30. if not 30 now. That pic is like 10 years old.
ErigBurger's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 21:39
ErigBurger
Dirk Hardpec

Roll Fizzlebeef

Buff Drinklots
surpman18's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/01/2009 23:38
surpman18
Is it me or does "Flexed Gluteus" sound like a gay porn.
GohanGVO's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/02/2009 00:38
GohanGVO


RAWWWWWWWWWWWWK THAT FLEXED GLUTEUSSSSSSSSSS!
Ball Buster's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/04/2009 14:30
Ball Buster
Capcom: Your #1 provider for Deep Cleavage and Flexed Gluteus.
IncipitOmega's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/07/2009 04:31
IncipitOmega
Sterling,u're a genius...
Nice article..I loled.
TheOGB's Avatar - Comment posted on 12/17/2009 17:24
TheOGB
How did I miss this?

Flexed Gluteus is the phrase of the month. Course if I was the ESRB I would've just called it 'dat ass', but I'm not the ESRB.
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