ESRB: Final Fantasy XIII has side-portions of breasts

7:00 AM on 12.17.2009   |   Jim Sterling

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Hot on the heels of yesterday's glorious Mass Effect 2 content descriptor, the ESRB returns with a wonderful summary of Final Fantasy XIII. The latest Square Enix RPG has finally been rated for North America, slapped with a T for Teen rating thanks to skimpy leotards, deep cleavage and side boobs. 

Yes, the ESRB is at it again, pointing out every little sexual detail it can find and making us all giggle in the process. Here's what the rating board has to say about the SICK FILTH to be found in Final Fantasy XIII:

Cutscenes occasionally depict female characters dressed in revealing outfits: Holographic dancers -- clad in bikini tops, skimpy leotards, and backless chaps -- glide above the city during a festivity performance; flying-motorcycle models wear skin-tight tops that expose deep cleavage. And during one elaborate sequence, a female character transforms from a crystal statue back to her human form -- sparkle effects, camera panning, and shimmering lights partially obscure the nude character, though side-portions of her breasts are visible (fleeting—one-to-two seconds).

Deep cleavage, skimpy leotards, side-portions of breasts and fleeting, partially-obscured nudity? Sounds like the perfect night in, right? One again, the ESRB has completely sold me on a videogame. Publishers need to just start putting the ratings on the back of the box, because they make every game sound brilliant.

Hit the jump for the full rating.

Players assume the roles of heroes caught in a war between two opposing forces in this fantasy role-playing game. Players travel between the planet Pulse and a moon named Cocoon to engage in missions for magical beings called the "fal’Cie. Missions involve battling enemy soldiers and creatures by using melee attacks (swords, knives, staffs, etc.), firearms, and magic spells (lightning strikes, fire blasts, etc.).

Combat is executed through a modified turn-based system in which players select various commands from a menu while freely moving one of three heroes through the battlefield. Players can also summon elemental creatures to battle an assortment of goblins, golems, zombies, wolves, frogs, bats, and robots.

The game’s cinematic cutscenes contain the most intense depictions of violence: machine gunfire from space ships strafe human characters below; humans and robotic soldiers exchange gunfire—aboard vessels, on the ground; a slow-motion gunfight depicts the cracked lens of a robot shot in the head by two semi-automatics.

Cutscenes occasionally depict female characters dressed in revealing outfits: Holographic dancers—clad in bikini tops, skimpy leotards, and backless chaps—glide above the city during a festivity performance; flying-motorcycle models wear skin-tight tops that expose deep cleavage. And during one elaborate sequence, a female character transforms from a crystal statue back to her human form—sparkle effects, camera panning, and shimmering lights partially obscure the nude character, though side-portions of her breasts are visible (fleeting—one-to-two seconds). The game also contains the expletives "a*s," "damn," and "hell"; however, it is the violent content, the suggestive themes that account for the Teen rating.